Its kinda going to be a sad Christmas

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SoCaliLover's picture
Joined: 12/07/06
Posts: 1591
Its kinda going to be a sad Christmas

I knew this day would come eventually -- but I am still sad.

Sounds like for the first time in 10-12 years I will not have all my children under one roof on Christmas. For years, we always have all the kids home at Christmas -- we have a bunch of traditions and things we do every Christmas eve, the girls always sleep in the same room Christmas eve and wake up together Christmas morning. The elf comes at night, we open presents, have waffles and hashbrown casserole --we have this planned down to the T.

But they are all older now and off with lives of their own. In the last week, two of my girls (Tiff and Age) told me that since they are with our family for on Thanksgiving, they will be with His families for Christmas morning. Age and Jon will come over in the afternoon on Christmas for Christmas dinner but they will sleep over at his parents house. And Tiff, well she just wont be able to come home Sad So I don't know then what Ash will do.

I did know this would eventually happen. And it is okay for a couple of reasons -- this year because we won't be settled in and maybe even still moving -- and it also give me more freedom to start (or restart) some traditions with Zayden -- the older two girls aren't religious so we stopped doing Christmas eve service (though we did last year) and then as they got bigger, we stopped some of the other more little kid traditions that I can pick back up.

But it still makes me sad to realize last year was probably one of the last years ALL the kids were home for Christmas. And Z won't have his sisters there to wake up with on Christmas morn.

SID081108's picture
Joined: 06/03/09
Posts: 1348

Aww, Amy, that is sad. I remember the first year we were not able to go home to be with my family at Christmas (because of DH's job), I was heartbroken. One of DH's friends told me "but he is your family now" and I was like "NO HE ISN'T"!! I hate being away from them on Christmas. I'm getting used to it now. Change is inevitable, but still so hard. At least you will have the move to take your mind off of it. And like you said, it will be great to start (or restart) some new traditions with Z. And I bet in the future you'll have all your kids under your roof for Christmas again (and even more people with all of their families!) We are somehow able to coordinate it every few years, even though we are spread out across the U.S.

Joined: 01/12/09
Posts: 658

ROFL lol okay i'm not laughing at you.. well maybe I am.... cause I remember not too long ago you complaining about all the ADULT children living in you house and wondering when they would leave lol and now???

I get what you mean, but just think of all the new traditions with all the new grandbabies Wink

momaof2boys's picture
Joined: 10/14/05
Posts: 741

That is sad Sad I miss being able to be with my parents christmas morning...LOL I know I have my own family now & we have our own traditions we are setting but that still doesn't make me miss my parents on christmas day. I haven't spent christmas day with them in over 6 years & it still gets to me. Hang in there like Carrie said I bet you all will be back under one roof in the future Smile

SoCaliLover's picture
Joined: 12/07/06
Posts: 1591

"mama22Girls" wrote:

ROFL lol okay i'm not laughing at you.. well maybe I am.... cause I remember not too long ago you complaining about all the ADULT children living in you house and wondering when they would leave lol and now???

I get what you mean, but just think of all the new traditions with all the new grandbabies Wink

LOL okay fair enough! ROFL I didn't want them living under my roof forever -and yes I definitely remember wishing they would move out and start their own lives- but not having them home for Christmas will seem weird.

But yes, we will have those grandbabies to spoil --if we get to see them. I am also sad to think Tiff will be living so far away so I won't get to see that one very often.

SoCaliLover's picture
Joined: 12/07/06
Posts: 1591

I didn't have the issue with not being with my parents -- I spent a lot of Christmases alone or with friends, so when I did get this huge family, I really worked at creating traditions and memeories. I think that is why it is sad.

Though that said, I think maybe I will be happy this year that everyone is not home cause we will be right in the middle of moving. YIKES

jlildrip's picture
Joined: 01/24/08
Posts: 269

"SoCaliLover" wrote:

But yes, we will have those grandbabies to spoil --if we get to see them. I am also sad to think Tiff will be living so far away so I won't get to see that one very often.

It's actually more difficult for me that Noah doesn't get to spend Christmas (or any holiday, including his birthday) with his grandparents than it is for me to not get to.

It will be very difficult adjusting to not having all the kids together like usual. We get so caught in our traditions that the change is hard to deal with. We have very specific traditions with my family, like you do, that I try to continue in our "off" years, but it's so not the same. Sad

We spend every other Christmas and Thanksgiving with my family. So one year is Thanksgiving, the next is Christmas. Luckily, we've been able to sync up with both sides of our families so that when we're with my family, all of us are together and when we're with DH's family, we're also all together. But that only means immediate family, no aunts/uncles/grandparents/cousins, etc. on either side.

You'll find new things to do with just Zayden and then the grandbabies and all the new family you're getting. Smile

SoCaliLover's picture
Joined: 12/07/06
Posts: 1591

It is going to be a hard adjustment --for us and the kids I think. This year probably not TOO bad since we will be moving but I am not used to sharing the kids --even the big girls with their mom -- they always stayed at our house and maybe went to moms later in the afternoon-- until several years ago she just started coming over for Christmas dinner. Then about 3 years ago, the girls started feeling bad and started inviting her over Christmas eve too! But it was always at our house.

Tiff I know is upset about not being home for Christmas. Age also said something yesterday that next year she gets Christmas so I know she is sad too about it. I know its compromises but DH and I never really dealt with that so its new to us.

I guess it works-- we have fallen into this tradition where about every other year we go to my aunts (though I don't know how many more years we can do that due to her age) so if all the kids come to that and then we do Christmas at our home every other year.

ourfirstblessing's picture
Joined: 01/07/07
Posts: 1094

i am sorry, that's a huge change. maybe you can use this year to come up with some new, long distance traditions and like you said create new ones with Zayden. I am sure it will be hard though