Kelly - luv2bmom

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Jenn0113's picture
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Kelly - luv2bmom

What's up with the BFing post on FB?

1aBABY's picture
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Last seen: 4 years 2 months ago
Joined: 12/05/06
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I saw it as well. Thinking of you...hope you're doing okay.

SoCaliLover's picture
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Jenn beat me to a post here but I saw your posting.... I cannot believe your employers is being like that.

luv2bmom's picture
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Last seen: 5 years 2 weeks ago
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okay guys...my sucky job is over. Part of me is thankful. I can concentrate on school. I am taking an online course now and that is why I disappeared. I hate to admit, but between school and FB games...ya'll lost. Please don't beat me up! xoxo

Today sucks b/c I specifically had a discussion with my previous boss several times about wanting advance notice on outside meetings to accommodate my pumping. Hell there were times I didn't even get lunch. I am sure some of ya'll remember how draining breast feeding can be and then if you are not eating properly you dry up. I wasn't asking for the world...just trying not to dry up. I practically cried when we had a conversation a few weeks ago. It was humiliating to have to discuss in detail why I needed to eat regularly and needed to know when to travel with my pump if I was going to be expected to be out most of the day with a man that could care less.

Last week he was going to tell one applicant not to bother interviewing because she was due in August. He loved her resume and loved her references. He asked me to schedule the interview. I called her and told her how much we wanted to meet and interview with her. She told me she was due in August and asked if that would be a problem. I couldn't tell her yes it was. That is illegal. I emailed him the Fed law and told him he was better off either A) calling and saying I am sorry someone was hired to the position directly by the physician without my knowledge or Dirol interviewing, not saying anything other than we will call you with the decision and just go with someone else. Basically do anything but call her and say no you can't interview now just because you are pregnant.

I sat through meeting after meeting listening to him talk to doctors running their practices about how they don't need to hire young women or pregnant women or women with kids b/c they are out sick a lot. He told me he understood what I was going through b/c he remembers his wife being pregnant...REALLY?! His kids are older then me and his wife was pregnant...not him...he never had a clue. He used me and when I tried to put my foot down he kicked me to the curb. He even said breastfeeding was difficult for his daughter b/c she just had a baby and she was a stay at home mom...like I shouldn't even try?! I don't feel proud to say this...but I hate him and I want God to get him...God forgive me.

Jenn0113's picture
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JERK! Seriously - I hate men (or bosses in general, or PEOPLE even more general) like that. They think their way of thinking is the only way and the best way and everyone else is idiots. I hope his entire staff and everyone he knows gets pregnant at the same time, lol.

luv2bmom's picture
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That would be nice...but I was his only employee. He is a medical consultant and doctors / practices around here hire him to help run their practice b/c most doctors don't have good business sense. Sad part is that they don't know they hired someone with no HR training / experience and someone will get sued eventually. He is a slick weasel. I took the job with him because I was laid off right after I found out I was pregnant and he was the only one willing to offer me one. He gave me no benefits. When I first worked for him I was a 1099 employee. During that time I took a vacation and therefore didn't get paid. I worked until the day before I had Marcella and went back 2 weeks after my c-section because of pressure from him. The day after I was back he told me to document all my time off including sick on a spreadsheet he created and not forget my first vacation. I had to remind him I wasn't his employee yet and he didn't pay me for that. He wanted to "dock" me for it and have me owe him in my accrued time. He hired me and then tried to take advantage of me b/c he knew I was desperate. He is a bottom feeder.

Jenn0113's picture
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O....M....G......he seriously is a sleaze!

kit1024's picture
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I cannot believe all that! How horrible to have to work for him!

luv2bmom's picture
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"kit1024" wrote:

I cannot believe all that! How horrible to have to work for him!

I felt horrible working for him...part of me feels even worse that I couldn't figure out a way to eat more sh*t so that I could continue to make it work. We are not poor or destitute by any means, but the little extras are nice to provide and it has been nice to save a little. I also don't like stressing my poor husband out and making him carry all the weight. He took me to lunch today though and has been very sweet about it all. I should be able to do anything and deal with just about anything for my kids right?! I just couldn't give up bfing...it was a principle I couldn't back down on and he didn't like it when I told him I wasn't apologizing for having a family. He said that was disrespectful and insubordinate for me to say. I guess....

AshnBill's picture
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You are doing the right thing and you shouldn't feel bad! Family comes first! Have you told him you're done, and how did he take that?

luv2bmom's picture
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oh no Ashley...he told me I was being insubordinate and my demands didn't fit with this business and that "we" couldn't get along. I had complained before. He had me out running around at meetings for over 6 hours one day that were not planned. He was driving and I was stuck riding with him. I was so engorged and sore and hungry. I told him I couldn't do it anymore. I needed a break and that going for so long without pumping was painful. He told me I was being disrespectful and argumentative. That he "understood" my problem b/c of his experience with his wife and daughter and that I was making a bigger deal of it then it was. He fired me this morning saying that my complaining to him that day was just the beginning and because I couldn't let it go it was too much. I would have never quit unless I had another job lined up or my DH and I "planned" it. It was humiliating. I have never been fired before. Once I had a job not going well and thought perhaps things might end badly if I stayed...but I found another one and transitioned before it got bad like that. I have been laid off before and negotiated a nice severance (my job before this one)...but never fired. I just feel so bad. I can't believe he fired me. He just gave me a raise right before I had Marcella telling me what a great job I was doing. I guess his opinion changed pretty quick.

Vstarr's picture
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OMG, what a serious a$$hole!!! First of all, good for you for standing up for yourself and sticking to your priorities, and do not feel bad about not laying down and letting that awful man walk all over you! I know how hard it is to keep pumping at work, even when you do have an employer that supports you w/ it. I am proud that I went 6 mo, but I just couldn't do it any longer than that. I had days where we were so busy that I barely got to eat or got to pump more than once during a 10 hr day, and that's was w/ a supportive boss. (Well she had to be b/c of the law, but still.)

Second of all, I believe if you really wanted to pursue it, you might have the grounds to sue him. One, for unlawful termination, depending on the reason that he documented on your termination paperwork, and if he had any documentation leading up to that. Even if he didn't put your "complaining" about needing to pump and eat a lunch as the reason, you still might have grounds based on his comments to you about it. And the second reason I was thinking of maybe doesn't apply. I think employers only HAVE to give you time and a place to pump if they have more than 10 employees, now that I'm remembering the law correctly.

Anyways, you may not even want to go down that road, but at the very least you could file unemployment. I happen to know that if he didn't document everything PERFECTLY, and especially if the reason he actually let you go is unlawful, you could challenge the fact that he let you go and they do everything they can to side w/ the employees, not the employers in this case. I'm just so sorry you had to deal w/ that, and so glad you don't work for him anymore!! (Sorry, that went kind of long.)

3inpink's picture
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Kelly I am so sorry you had to deal with such a loser! I'm thinking you could sue him also. How dare he say all of those terrible things to you! The facts make me so angry for you!

I know how hard it is to loose a job and please do not beat yourself up, in a case like this you really didn't ask for anything that any other reasonable person would see is normal. Making the adjustments to continue working and sucking it would have killed you! There are somethings that are just going over the line and no one should have to deal with anything like that!

XOXO