feel like i dont know anything

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KAYMYA's picture
Joined: 09/18/07
Posts: 230
feel like i dont know anything

So here I am 24 weeks (tommorow) with twin boys....i feel like everything with this pregnancy is.out of my control and with no clue what to.expect....all I really know is that I don't know anything LOL..
I've asked my doc a few questions to try to help me feel a little more in the know....I have no clue.how far along I might go and when I ask more detailed questions to how far.they will let Me go, its almost as if they don't think I will go close to term....granted I get they don't really know when I will give birth...ive also asked questions regarding type if delivery I will have and all I really get.is that they don't know until.we get there..which once again anything can change and depends on babies postion blah blah blah lol..
I feel like I really don't know what to expect.....i think I may take a list of what if questions to my next appt, would that be silly?? Like in what scenario will thy induce me.before say 37ish weeks, what complications will call for.bed rest, or off work etc....

I just feel so clueless to.this pg...

Joined: 02/20/11
Posts: 865

I think with any birth its hard to know exactly what will happen and when. Just as a doctor explaining to a woman having just one wont go into all the possible complications, they probably wont do that with you either unless you are very explicit. I dont think they want to worry you. For example, I got my perscription for a GD test and the doctor didnt say, if you have GD your baby could... instead they will wait and see if its necessary to talk about it or not.

If you have no particular health concerns, there is no reason that you shouldnt have a normal vaginal birth with the boys in the 37 to 40 week range. I know four friends with twins who all had vaginal births at 39 to 40 weeks.

Relax, take a deep breath. This not not like a normal delivery but neither is it something completely unheard of or cause for concern. (In Canada multiples are one in fifty, so pretty common!) If knowing all the possibilities will help, then bring your questions and get them answered. If they have not brought anything specific up with you, feel confident in the knowledge that they arent worried and that everything should proceed as normal.


JenPelto's picture
Joined: 11/23/08
Posts: 73

I ALWAYS took a list of questions with me at every Doctor's appt with my first pregnancy. (I'm no expert now, of course, but I feel like I have a lot less questions and fewer complications popping up).

I sometimes waited an eternity (or so it seemed) before the Doc actually came in to my room. He was always rushing and brushed me off, it seemed. So I started to write down questions and I discussed each item with him. It worked out well!

When the doctor answers the question for you, and if another question pops up, ask them on the spot! Like let's say you want to know under what conditions you will be induced early, and they say "it's hard to say...maybe if your babies are in a weird position" --

Stop them and ask "How common is that?"

You know what I mean Smile

Joined: 04/10/11
Posts: 1703

I've been asking for the "typical" twin scenarios in my OB's practice. I can tell you what I've heard, but obviously yours will be different and you'll just need to keep pressing for info. They're always somewhat reluctant to share "typical" scenarios for the practice because of the extra unknowns with twins, but for my OB the information I was able to get was:

- Typical bed rest (at least just stop working) is 28 weeks and that seems likely given my early contractions at 16-18 weeks and the one small bleeding episode at 20 weeks. By 32 weeks I should expect to do practically nothing. I just signed up for all of my baby classes today to get them done before 28 weeks. They suggested I NOT sign up for the prepared childbirth classes, which makes me a little nervous, so I'm only doing the caesarean birth class instead (and infant care, parents of multiples, and breast feeding classes).

- Very early pre-term labor (before ~32 weeks) and I definitely need to go to the hospital with the level 3 NICU, otherwise I might be at a different hospital with a level 2 NICU (I still have no idea!! But for the bleeding I went to one with the awesome NICU since they're both close to home.)

- Before ~34 weeks they'll try to stop labor. After 34 they won't.

- The OB guesses mine will most likely be born at 35-36 weeks.

- My baby B is bigger than baby A so a vaginal birth is not very likely. Plus, I probably cannot get an epidural (which is required for twin vaginal birth so they can get the second one out by c-section quickly, if necessary) so vaginal is probably out for that reason and I still need to meet with an anesthesiologist to find out if I'll have to get general anesthesia.

I know it sucks not knowing. And so often they'll start to give you some sense and then be all, "Oh wait, twins? Yeah, I don't know."

KAYMYA's picture
Joined: 09/18/07
Posts: 230

Thanks ladies....I am starting to write a list of questions for my next appt on the 8th. I am going to ask what theory twin protocol is , besides what I know already . My doc does bi weekly appts after 22 weeks and cervical checks at all twin appts..

Starryblue702's picture
Joined: 04/06/11
Posts: 5454

It's absolutely NOT silly to take a list of questions with you to your next appt. They tell all first time moms to do this with their initial OB appts, and this is your first set of twins (lol!) so why should you be any different? I do agree with your OB, that there's really no way of knowing when to expect to go into labor, but that's the case with any pregnancy. I also agree with them not knowing how you might deliver, as it does depend on how the babies are positioned in those last few weeks... not to mention the fact that they could always turn around up until the last day! I know it's hard not to be 100% prepared, but I would say just try to relax and go with the flow. Are you looking to try and deliver them vaginally? Is your OB open to that?

MelanieP's picture
Joined: 09/25/09
Posts: 882

I agree...take as many questions with you as you want. Obviously no one has a crystal ball but it is nice to get an idea of things. It can be pretty overwhelming. How are you doing?

KAYMYA's picture
Joined: 09/18/07
Posts: 230

I have been going good... hard to move around with my pubic hurting me a.lot at times, and the.fact that my.hooha has officially disappeared LOL...had and u/s and baby a weighs 1lb2oz and 1lb 6 oz..