DH and I were on our way to a funeral yesterday and my MIL calls us (my car has the bluetooth feature so we can both talk through the car speakers) and ask what our plans are for this weekend so we tell her we are doing nothing on Friday, DS has T-Ball practice on Saturday and then we're going to a crawfish boil, and Sunday we are going to the March for Babies walk. She proceeds to tell us that she will pick DS up from pre-school on Friday, take him to practice on Saturday, and bring him back Sunday morning. I told her that I have to take him to practice on Saturday because the mom's are making poms poms for the next game and I helping and I told her that he is going to the crawfish boil with us and that I need him Sunday morning for the March for Babies walk. She says this real long drawn out okaaaaayyyyy. Like that is the mose unreasonable thing she has ever heard of. I could tell that she was starting to get upset so DH tells her that he will spend the night with her Friday and she will bring him back Saturday morning before practice.
After I got off the phone, DH and I got in an argument about this. He thinks I have it out for his mom, but really the only thing that upset me about his mom is that she told us what she was doing with OUR son, she didn't ask. She is very pushy and controlling and I have to make sure she knows her boundaries. Otherwise, she will make it seem like DS is her child and we're just occasional babysitters. I cannot stand this! I've even had to explain to her before that being a grandmother is not an entitlement, it is a privilege and she does not get to make decisions for our son. The other thing is that I feel like I do not have to explain myself about the fact that I want to be with my son. I feel like time is too short and since I'm a working mother, I don't get to spend enough time with him. If anything was to ever happen to my child, I don't want to regret the time that I could have spent with him. I mean I know there will be occasions where he will have to stay overnight with grandma, but when he doesn't have to, I would like that time to be spent with us.
I just know things will hit the fan when the new baby comes. She is going to want the baby to come over all the time. I am already kind of freaking out about the dangers of SIDS since my niece passed away and I'm going to be very uncomfortable about the baby staying the night somewhere else. It will probably be an issue that I know I will need to work out myself, but the first year, is going to be very stressful on me.
Am I overreacting? Please be honest because as of right now I'm lost at what I should do. I can't talk to my MIL because it goes in one ear and out the other. Last time we had this discussion, she even went as far as to criticize the relationship I have with my mom just to get the attention off of her. I'm planning on talking with DH about it again tonight, but since he's a mama's boy this always turns into a fight.