How long do you plan on BFing?

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jac81's picture
Joined: 11/22/10
Posts: 1131
How long do you plan on BFing?

My initial goal was to one year, but now when I think of having to stop (even though a year is so far away), I get upset. Sad So now I think I may go beyond a year. I just enjoy it so much and can't imagine not bfing. My MIL is so unsupportive of bfing that it is beyond annoying. She never breastfed and apparantely has never heard of anyone bfing past 3 months. What?? My mom mentioned to her yesterday that I plan on bfing beyond a year and she looked at me like I was crazy. She said that the baby wouldn't even be taking a bottle anymore by that point so why would I want to continue to nurse. She even told me that nursing that long is a terrible habit! Oh Em Gee!!! This woman is going to make me flip my lid! Honestly, I think she wants the baby to spend the night with her so bad and it drives her crazy that she can't since I'm nursng. How selfish is that?

So I wanted to find out from my fellow mama's, how long do you plan on doing it?

Joined: 03/07/05
Posts: 1595

I like to try and give my kids at least a good 18 months of nursing. From that point on I've had one that self weaned, and two that I gently weaned as they were slowing down anyway. My one that self weaned nursed until she was 2 and then weaned when my next baby was born and she didn't like the taste of the new milk anymore. With my first I gently weaned her when she was just turning two and I was pregnant with my second. I also gently weaned my second dd (who was slowing down anyway) when I was pregnant with my 4th. I was still tandem nursing and the thought of nursing THREE kids was just too much!! I weaned her on her third birthday. So, I guess my answer is at least 18 months, and from that point on we just wait and see depending on the circumstances.

Dylemma's picture
Joined: 09/04/09
Posts: 449

My initial goal was just to be able to do it lol after my bad experience last time. Now my goal is 6 months until we start solids. If going well at that point then will continue. Still in a fair amount of pain, so even looking at 6 months seems a big goal I am not positive I can make.

irishgirl's picture
Joined: 04/10/07
Posts: 1043

I'll go until he self weans. That's what I did with the other two and it worked out well.
DD1 weaned when she was 33 months old. I tandem nursed for 7 months with her and her sister. Then DD2 weaned around 13/14 months old. I was pregnant and she wasn't ever terribly interested in nursing so when my supply started to go down a little she wasn't interested in working for it.
This is my last baby, so I hope he goes at least 18 months, but not as long as DD1. I'd love to make it to around 2.

Oh, and I've found that after a year, I just pretty much stopped talking about nursing. I didn't hide it and if someone out right asked I would tell them we were still nursing. But it wasn't anything that was up for discussion. If someone asked when I was going to stop I'd tell them when we were ready, and we weren't yet.

jac81's picture
Joined: 11/22/10
Posts: 1131

I love that there are so many who nurse beyond one year! Smile I also heard that weaning is harder on the mom than baby! LOL! I can only imagine!

Joined: 02/20/11
Posts: 865

Ten months for us! It was the same for my first daughter. I'll have to go back to work and for me that's when it's time. I might change my mind but for now that's the plan.

Joined: 10/24/10
Posts: 470

I would love to make it to a year, but I am willing to wait and see. I've made little goals all along to keep myself going. 3 weeks, then 6 weeks, then 3 months - After three months I have to go back to work and plan to keep going, but I will have to see how it goes. We are at two months and finally (mostly) off the breast shields, so I am optimistic. Smile

wobbs's picture
Joined: 05/27/10
Posts: 1502

My goal is until she self weans. Hoping for longer than her sister, who weaned just before a year.

blondiess4u's picture
Joined: 11/08/07
Posts: 1450

I felt the same way with BFing with DS1 that I didn't want to stop because I enjoyed it so much and so did he. I breastfed for 23 months with him, but was pretty miserable after he turned a year because he never slept more then 2 hours at a time until I weaned him before his second birthday. So with DS2 I have been expressing and feeding him with bottles during the say so he drinks more and sleeps more at night and I have enjoyed it more this way so I can get more sleep. I will probably BF for a year with him give or take a few months. I have also been freezing 5 oz a day just in case I want to stop close to a year, that way he is still getting the breastmilk. I plan on having more LO's so I won't be afraid to stop with this one.

Sorry your MIL is being like that. She must be from the formula days where women thought breastfeeding was inappropriate, so I wouldn't worry about it, BFing has come back and is alot more common now and she will just have to accept that. We all do whats best for our LO's. You probably wouldn't let Sophia spend the night even if you wern't nursing right? LOL

Joined: 07/15/07
Posts: 630

I don't *enjoy* nursing. But it's free and it's a hell of a lot easier than mixing/cleaning bottles 24/7, and we aren't having any problems so I have no reason to stop.

I'll probably BF until he gets teeth and starts biting, at which point I hope to be able to pump and bottle feed him breast milk. I'll do that until he can drink cows milk, which is what, 1 year? I can't remember when it's safe to switch them.

wobbs's picture
Joined: 05/27/10
Posts: 1502

"rbrooks14332" wrote:

I don't *enjoy* nursing. But it's free and it's a hell of a lot easier than mixing/cleaning bottles 24/7, and we aren't having any problems so I have no reason to stop.

I'll probably BF until he gets teeth and starts biting, at which point I hope to be able to pump and bottle feed him breast milk. I'll do that until he can drink cows milk, which is what, 1 year? I can't remember when it's safe to switch them.

They can start cows milk once they are 1 year, and have a fairly balanced diet which includes iron sources. And I'm sure you know, but teeth don't always mean biting ... if they are latched properly they won't bite ... Annabelle never bit me while nursing.

K_Lo's picture
Joined: 11/16/07
Posts: 1201

Both of my kids self weaned. DS1 weaned about 9 months because I was pg with DD and he didn't like my milk after that, I guess hormones can change the taste. DD weaned at almost 16 months. I was going to try weaning at 18 months, but I knew she was slowing down and getting less interested. I guess with her it wasn't completely self weaning because I stopped offering and I refused her after bed time after her 1st b-day. I never refused her during the day though. I plan to do the same with Caleb. I don't think I'm comfortable going past 2 years, 18 months feels like enough to me. But honestly who knows at this point! He's my last so I may not want to stop!

I'm sorry your MIL is annoying about Sofia nursing. I just don't see how people can consider it their business. And I can't believe she's already thinking of taking her overnight! My DS will be 4 in March and I still don't let him spend the night with anyone, unless I'm busy giving birth to his sibling lol.

jac81's picture
Joined: 11/22/10
Posts: 1131

Yeah...we have my company holiday party on Friday and I told her that my mom is watching the kids since she lives across the street and I can easily get them when we get home. She kept insisting they spend the night with her and I explained its not possible with her nursing and with me working now, I miss them and don't really want them gone for a long time. We spoiled her by letting DS stay with her when he was a baby, but times have changed and she'll just have to get over it.

Kate83's picture
Joined: 01/04/11
Posts: 587

12-18 months is ideal, but I will be opening a daycare center next summer and wont be able to take Aisley until she is 18 months old, so she will be giving pumped bottles while with the sitter.

kmm123's picture
Joined: 12/13/08
Posts: 1839

Nov Lurker Smile I nursed my first about 13 months. I don't know that it was 100% self weaned but it was gentle, I just slowly dropped sessions and by 13 months he was only nursing before bed, one day I just tried laying him down w/o nursing and he had no issue and that was that. It was very natural for both of us. I also got preg shortly there after and it was nice not to be preg and nursing. I intend to nurse at least 12 months. I enjoy nursing but around the 13 month mark I was ready to have my body totally back, I hope to have an easy time hitting the 12 month mark and will play it by ear from there, if I can wean around then I probably will if he's really attached we'll do whatever works. My family is not super supportive of the whole nursing thing, I was a formula baby so it definitely kind of weirds my mom out but she doesn't say much. We do what's right for us and that's what matters to me Smile

kittenchan's picture
Joined: 08/12/07
Posts: 1118

I will breastfeed until my son tells me he's done. My daughter stopped wanting to breastfeed at 7 months on the dot.

pobaby477's picture
Joined: 10/02/08
Posts: 210

I bf'ed Zara until she was about 13/14 months which was around the time I got preg and I was so sad it was over. I'm assuming she self weaned bc of the change in taste but even so, she onli fed in the am and when she went to sleep.

As for ur MIL, she will get over it. No one in my fam has bf'ed so it was new to them with Zara and I had to stand up against a lot of criticism. But I kinda enjoyed her not being able to stay over/with MIL for 3+ hours since she was on the boob Dirol lol. Whoops! Did I say that hahaha

pobaby477's picture
Joined: 10/02/08
Posts: 210

Oh and to answer ur ?, I plan on nursing Zaylee until at least 1 but not after 2.

Joined: 04/05/06
Posts: 870

"rbrooks14332" wrote:

I don't *enjoy* nursing. But it's free and it's a hell of a lot easier than mixing/cleaning bottles 24/7, and we aren't having any problems so I have no reason to stop.

I'll probably BF until he gets teeth and starts biting, at which point I hope to be able to pump and bottle feed him breast milk. I'll do that until he can drink cows milk, which is what, 1 year? I can't remember when it's safe to switch them.

You took the words right out of my mouth. I feel better knowing there's someone else out there that feels the same way. Sometimes I feel like I'm a "bad" mom for not "enjoying" it.

Dylemma's picture
Joined: 09/04/09
Posts: 449

"L.Miller" wrote:

You took the words right out of my mouth. I feel better knowing there's someone else out there that feels the same way. Sometimes I feel like I'm a "bad" mom for not "enjoying" it.

Add me to your club I do it, but don't love it. I don't want to stop due to that though as I know it is best. But definitely not the enjoyable lovely thing I expected.

Joined: 03/07/05
Posts: 1595

"Dylemma" wrote:

Add me to your club I do it, but don't love it. I don't want to stop due to that though as I know it is best. But definitely not the enjoyable lovely thing I expected.

You know, that was definitely me with my first! I was just trying to make it one more month, then one more month. It wasn't until she was a year that I actually enjoyed it! Smile Anyway, I found that pumping and doing "extras" made it harder. Also, trying to schedule feeds and such. Also, I was nervous about nursing in public with my first. That being said. It just gets easier and easier as time goes by. I know some of you have other issues that you are trying to deal with too... that definitely has to be hard. Hang in there girls!!

jac81's picture
Joined: 11/22/10
Posts: 1131

I love nursing, but hate pumping. I really wish I was a SAHM just so I wouldn't have to deal with all of the daily pumping. It just makes it so much more stressful and now I'm dealing with a supply issue. I just ordered some "mother love more milk plus" capsules which I have heard is awesome so I'm hoping that will help. BFing is definitely more challenging then bottle feeding, but I guess with this being my last baby, I'm just trying to enjoy all the little moments.

pwbattist's picture
Joined: 02/04/11
Posts: 235
Had I replied yesterday....

I would have said that I planned on breastfeeding for five more minutes after the two day cluster feeding, broken up only by intermittent screaming and crying.:D But seriously, I really do want to make it to one year. Then I want my boobies back. Of course, I'm being realistic. I return to work in January and I'll be pumping three days a week for as long as 10 hours at a time. I'm not sure how my milk supply will hold up. So far so good.

kmm123's picture
Joined: 12/13/08
Posts: 1839

FWIW I enjoyed BF'ing as time went on. It's exhausting at first! And I'm lucky in that both my babies have had good latches and my nipples never cracked or anything. But just the CONSTANT nursing at first makes it hard for me to enjoy. I mean Rory would nurse every hour if I didn't occasionally distract him! But as they get older and the feedings space out I really found I did enjoy it with Evan. The last session before bed when it was often the only snuggle time my active baby gave me in a day.....at that point I really did love it. But by 13/14 months love it or not I was glad to get my boobs back Smile And it's free.....I do love that it's free

Dylemma's picture
Joined: 09/04/09
Posts: 449

Makes it hard to love something when every time you do it you are in some degree of pain, and yes I have seen several lactation specialists. Really makes it hard when people tell you how easy it was for them too. This is my third and the first time I have been somewhat successful breastfeeding and it still isn't right. Again hard to love something that also makes you feel like a failure.

jac81's picture
Joined: 11/22/10
Posts: 1131

"Dylemma" wrote:

Makes it hard to love something when every time you do it you are in some degree of pain, and yes I have seen several lactation specialists. Really makes it hard when people tell you how easy it was for them too. This is my third and the first time I have been somewhat successful breastfeeding and it still isn't right. Again hard to love something that also makes you feel like a failure.

Awe! Emma, this makes me sad. Sad You are not a failure! I know that you are doing everything you can to make sure your baby is happy and healthy and that right there does NOT make you a failure! :bigarmhug:

Joined: 07/15/07
Posts: 630

See I don't have any pain. No problem BF'ing in public. I was even reminded a few weeks ago of what a PITA it is to take bottles. I tried pumping before I went shopping with my mom and grandma so that I could give Owen a bottle while we were in a store shopping. Disastrous. So I just fed him.

I don't hate BF'ing, but I don't love it either. It's one of those things that I could go with or without. Maybe I feel that way because my first was FF due to tummy issues and she's a normal, healthy, smart, loved little girl. So I know from personal experience that while BF'ing is best, formula isn't poison.

My two best friends cried and cried when their little ones weaned, and I just don't think I'm going to be *that* mom.

Emma, the fact that you've tried makes you not a failure :bigarmhug:

nori_garsi's picture
Joined: 10/31/06
Posts: 2069

I'm pumping but I've had such a hard time with it...I've had mastitis twice, thrush, and recurrent plugged ducts. Right now I'm just going day by day. My goal is at least six months but I don't know that I'll make it that long, so I'm just taking it one day at a time. My smaller goal right now is 3 months...and then I'll go from there.