Push Present?

**blondiess4u** · 08-10-2011, 01:37 PM

Anyone thinking about asking or expecting one from your DH?
I have teased my SO about this but alot of people think it's alittle ridiculas. He offered to get me the Coach Diaper bag I wanted but I dont consider that as a "push gift". He is not really romantic, but it would be nice to get some flowers or a nice mothers charm braclet.
I don't want to ask for it but I know men don't usually think of these things. I guess I don't want to ask because it's more about the thought then the gift and I don't want to make him.
Maybe I'll have my mom hint at it to him! LOL

What are your ladies thought on this?

CanadianaSally · 08-10-2011, 01:56 PM

For me I'm so thrilled about having this baby I think a *push present* is ridiculous! However, I do expect to at least have flowers when baby comes... DH brought me some when we had our Clara

I definately think every woman should have some form of a gift whether flowers, etc. after everything you go through but men aren't always on the same level with this stuff!! LOL I think I just hate the term "push present".

**AimeeLynne** · 08-10-2011, 02:40 PM

I think it would be awesome to get one! Considering you are pregnant for 40ish weeks, the hell your body goes through, and the trials of labor, I think we deserve something! lol DH wouldn't ever get me anything like that...I bet he's never heard of a push present. Hell, I just got my 1st mothers day gift last month!! (he didn't consider the mother's day when I was pg to be one, even though DS's birth date is 6/1!) I think anything done or given is nice, at least to recognize everything that you went through.

**rbrooks14332** · 08-10-2011, 02:41 PM

Here's my thoughts on that (hope I don't offend lol):
We got into pregnant together. And yeah, I have to do the physical part of it (from carrying the baby to getting the baby out), but I agreed to it. And DH hasn't exactly 'done nothing' during the pregnancy. He's had to step in majorly to help with things around the house that I normally take care of. He's doing MORE than his fair share of caring for our DD. He's been there for me physically and emotionally for the past 9 months and he's going to be there for me physically and emotionally after the baby is born too. So to expect him to get me something ON TOP of all that he's already doing would be selfish of me, IMO.

If he really wants to get me something, he can get me an Edible Arrangement (gosh I love those things!) but I certainly won't be suggesting or hinting that he has to/should get me something and I certainly won't be upset if he doesn't get me anything.

He didn't get me anything after DD was born and I"m glad he didn't. I mean, come on. There's a brand new baby. OUR brand new baby. No amount of gold and diamonds in the world could have been more important to me! (not suggesting that they would be to anyone else, more saying that i'm glad he didn't waste his money because honestly I probably wouldn't have noticed the sparkly new necklace because I wouldn't have been able to take my eyes off the baby)

**Freesia34** · 08-10-2011, 03:06 PM

The ONLY time in 16 years that my husband has not said, here's my credit card by yourself a gift for a holiday or birthday was the day I had Mélodie. He surprised, and I mean shocked me with a Canon Rebel!! I don't expect anything this time around but that gift touched me more than anything else I've ever received!

**wobbs** · 08-10-2011, 03:08 PM

Originally Posted by rbrooks14332

Here's my thoughts on that (hope I don't offend lol):
We got into pregnant together. And yeah, I have to do the physical part of it (from carrying the baby to getting the baby out), but I agreed to it. And DH hasn't exactly 'done nothing' during the pregnancy. He's had to step in majorly to help with things around the house that I normally take care of. He's doing MORE than his fair share of caring for our DD. He's been there for me physically and emotionally for the past 9 months and he's going to be there for me physically and emotionally after the baby is born too. So to expect him to get me something ON TOP of all that he's already doing would be selfish of me, IMO.

If he really wants to get me something, he can get me an Edible Arrangement (gosh I love those things!) but I certainly won't be suggesting or hinting that he has to/should get me something and I certainly won't be upset if he doesn't get me anything.

He didn't get me anything after DD was born and I"m glad he didn't. I mean, come on. There's a brand new baby. OUR brand new baby. No amount of gold and diamonds in the world could have been more important to me! (not suggesting that they would be to anyone else, more saying that i'm glad he didn't waste his money because honestly I probably wouldn't have noticed the sparkly new necklace because I wouldn't have been able to take my eyes off the baby)

I have to say I agree completely! The only things I want are a healthy baby and some brie and grapes and westfalian ham after delivery.

**abh413** · 08-10-2011, 05:42 PM

I guess it depends on your relationship. I have friends that have gotten expensive jewelry to nothing. I also have friends that feel like some of the PP about gifts. So it just depends on your situation. If your SO would be offended by the asking for a gift, then don't ask. If not, & you have something you would like, then ask.

For us, my DH is pretty clueless when it comes to gifts. He means well but... He's also a procrastinator. So, if I want a specific gift for any reason/holiday, it has to be written down. Otherwise, he will waste money at the last minute buying crap. IMO, wasting money is worse than asking for a gift.

When DD was born, I asked for a charm for my charm bracelet. Now, I didn't get it til almost Christmas, but I did get it... he chose a baby shoe with her birthstone. We never called it a "push present" (although, I've heard the term)... it was more a commemerative gift of a special time in our lives... fit perfectly with the point of a charm bracelet IMO.

I told DH this time I would like the same... A charm with DS birthstone for my charm bracelet. If I'm lucky, I will get it before Christmas.

**Mrs. Mac** · 08-10-2011, 05:46 PM

Originally Posted by rbrooks14332

If he really wants to get me something, he can get me an Edible Arrangement (gosh I love those things!) but I certainly won't be suggesting or hinting that he has to/should get me something and I certainly won't be upset if he doesn't get me anything.

Now this s a great idea. Takes care of a) a thoughtful, practical gift & b)gives you something delicious to eat besides disgusting hospital food. THIS is what I'd like! And I agree about the term "push present". It's sounds...yucky to me.

**L.Miller** · 08-10-2011, 05:51 PM

DH rarely buys gifts. If he has the chance he'll stop by a store on Valentine's day and grab chocolates b/c he knows that's all I really want. He does so much else for me. Grilled all summer long and I get to stay at home now so that's a pretty big gift. I'll just be thrilled if it all works out for him to make it to the hospital. Every day he takes off during harvest counts as double, so it's not like he'll be taking off any time other than when the baby comes. Flowers would be nice, but I'm not counting on it.