What I learned as a mother...

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jac81's picture
Joined: 11/22/10
Posts: 1131
What I learned as a mother...

I wrote this as a FB note today and thought I'd share it all with you as well even though I believe most of you are friends with me on FB, for those that are not..... Smile

What I learned as a mother....the 2nd time around!
As I was feeding the baby last night, I realized at how much I have grown as a mother and how much Sophia has taught me the past 4 months. When I was pregnant with her and raising my 4 year old almost 5 year old son, I thought that I knew all I needed to know to raise a child. Boy was I wrong!! Sometimes I feel guilty that I didn't know all what I know now with my son and I feel like he just got half of me, but then I have to remember that it's all a learning process and I did the best that I know how. So here is what I learned and realized the moment Sophia came into our lives, starting from the beginning:

1. I am strong enough to have a calm and gentle birth without the help of medication. All I need is pure determination, prayer, and the support of my loving husband. In a way, I kind of wish I just went with a home birth instead. Smile

2. Breastfeeding truly is a gift from God!

3. Not all babies are the same. Some are easy to take care of and other's are a little more challenging, but every challenging day is so worth it!

4. Attachment Parenting isn't so bad after all and will not make her into a spoiled child. It allows me to go with my motherly instincts instead of following some book trying to teach me how to train my baby to fit to my schedule.

5. It's ok to wear her in my moby all day if I want to. She enjoys being close to mommy and I enjoy being close to her.

6. I will never let her cry it out!! Period!

7. I will always feed on demand and there is nothing wrong with that even if she is using me as a "pacifier"!

8. Staying up until 3AM partying with my friends is not nearly as important than staying up at 3AM nursing my baby.

9. It's so much cheaper and healthier to make my own baby food. (Looking forward to doing this in a couple more months)

10. It's ok to let her sleep in our room just a little longer. She's only this little for a short time!

11. There are days that I am so tired and smell like baby vomit, but I am still physically able to get out of bed, get my son and daughter ready, and go to work. That's what being a working mom is all about!

12. Watching my son and daughter play together makes my heart happy. He can always make her laugh and I hope he continues to make her laugh for years to come!

13. Date night is ok once a month. I need a break every now and then and there is no reason to feel guilty about it! My children are important, but so is our marriage!

14. I never have much time for myself anymore and I'm ok with that. Smile

And last, but not least

15. I learned to stop judging other mothers on how they bring up their child and I wish some other mom's will do the same. In the end, we all strive for the same thing and that is a happy and healthy child!

wobbs's picture
Joined: 05/27/10
Posts: 1502

Love it! Thanks for sharing.

blondiess4u's picture
Joined: 11/08/07
Posts: 1450

Isn't it amazing the things you learn with a second child... you almost want to have your 1st one second if that was possible!

I did attachment parenting with the first one and continue to do it with the second, but my favorite of your list was #12 and 13. I think it's amazing to give DS1 the gift of a sibling and watch them start to interact. I also think date night is SO important. That is something I didn't do with my first and it makes an incredible difference in a relationship seeing as I am not with my DS1's father anymore.
I agree, you can't judge other people's parenting. I use to too, but It takes alot of work to raise a child and you have to do what's best for you and THAT child.
TFS!

K_Lo's picture
Joined: 11/16/07
Posts: 1201

I love it! I agree with everything you posted. I also feel like I've grown a lot as a mother since having my first, and even my second baby.

My favorite part though, was the part about not judging other moms. Being a mom is such a hard job, only other moms really know how it feels. I don't understand why we don't use that knowledge to support one another, instead we judge, belittle and criticize.

I need to take your advice on date night. I don't remember the last time DH and I went out without the kids!

jac81's picture
Joined: 11/22/10
Posts: 1131

So glad you all enjoyed it! All of this has been going through my head lately and it was so nice to finally get it all down. Smile