Go the F*%$ to sleep
So remember how I posted that Teagan put herself to sleep that one night. Yeah. The past two nights its taken over an hours and a half for her to fall asleep. 45 minutes used to be long. 1.5 hours is unacceptable. How do you put your LO down for the night? Have to had to work to get him/her to go the F%&# to sleep on their own? What did you do?
Ooh, yuck. I'm (clearly) no expert on sleep, but we NORMALLY get her down within about 15-20 minutes these days (that's from lights out). We alternate nights, but here's my routine:
-Daddy cleans her up, brushes teeth, puts pjs on, fills up water, etc.
-I read 3 books, the last one always being a "good night" book (Goodnight Moon, Time for Bed, etc.)
-I turn off the light and sit next to her bed on the floor and sing 4-5 lullabies. About 60% of the time, she's asleep by the time I finish. Otherwise, I stop, and she'll say "Mommy, sing!" and I'll say "Shhhhhhh" and repeat this until she falls asleep. That's maybe another 35% of the time. Sometimes she makes me hold her hand until she falls asleep, which is fine.
The only difference when we switch roles is that instead of singing, DH will quietly tell her made up stories with the lights out.
The other 5% are the GO THE F#*&$^ TO SLEEP nights. I hate them. I loathe them. On those, I get fed up after sitting in the dark listening to her thrash around forever, and leave the room while she's still awake. Half the time, I get out, she cries, I go "SHHHHHH" through a crack in the door, and she actually does. Sometimes this requires repeating a couple of times, but eventually she falls asleep. The other half of the time, she just freaks out if I leave, and I end up HAVING to sit in there until she falls asleep. I think 1 1/2 hours is probably the worst it's ever been, but that is AWFUL. Once or twice I've just laid down on the floor and fallen asleep myself, occasionally waking to go "SHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" when she starts talking to me.
I really, really hate those nights. But, if there's a silver lining, it's that they've proven to be just as unpredictable as the easy "omg she let me leave the room AWAKE!" nights, meaning it's probably not your new normal. Just a terrible, terrible blip.
I sure hope so, for your sake!
DH and I alternate rolls each night. We do potty, teethbrushing, PJs, 5-10 books, then call the other parent to come in and put her down. DH lays there and pats her. I nurse her to sleep. Around minute 45 last night, all I could think was "OMG, I'm never getting out of here! Who gave my child caffeine?!"
I'm thinking of trying having DH put her down for awhile until she's going to bed on her own. I've read methods that involve gradually getting further and further from her until he's outside the room whispering to her. Maybe we'll try that over the course of a few weeks?
I've heard that too. We actually had a stretch there where we were able to leave with her awake a lot, and then somehow we totally backslid. I don't mind waiting with her as long as she's falling asleep within a reasonable amount of time, though. But it does make it so I never want to leave her with anyone else for bedtime, because I either don't trust them to wait with her (MIL) or I don't want to make them have to (My mom, babysitters)
I think having DH do it so you get her off the nursing to sleep thing for good is not a bad plan. There's just NO WAY to extricate yourself from nursing.
Last night I got so fed up with her nursing and picking at my chest that I sat up and told her "NO more booby. Go to bed." She actually just accepted it and then insisted I pat her back like DH does. Stunned me for sure. She's much more attached to nursing in the morning than nursing to bed. I really don't mind it. Like you said, if it takes less than 20 minutes. Its the endless nursing that really gets to me. I'd never really tried just popping her off and telling her to go to sleep until last night.
Hm. Well maybe that's a good place to start, then? I always used to do that. I couldn't handle nursing for more than like ten minutes or fifteen minutes, max.
How long does she nap during the day? Simon has one nap, 2 hours max. By bedtime hes exhausted. I just put him down and he sleeps. BUT if he's not ready like he had a late nap, it does take forever.
She naps 2-3 hours per day. I have no control over it because its at daycare 5 days per week.
Wow, I think I might die. That is ridiculous, and hopefully a short lived phase.
I'm very strict about bedtime. 9pm. So every day at 9pm I gather her up and we go brush our teeth (she loves to brush her teeth so it's not hard), then we get her in her night diaper and I tell her it's night night time. She usually goes in there and climbs into bed herself with her water sippy. I put her blanket over her and give her a hug, a kiss and a high 5 and leave, shutting the door behind me. That's it. That's all she wrote. Most of the time it's enough and she'll just lay there and roll around a while and then fall asleep. Sometimes she gets out of bed and plays for a bit. Rarely, she'll yell under the door for a minute but then she always gets back in her bed eventually and goes to sleep. She knows that unless the house is on fire, nobody is going to be coming in there.
How did you manage that, Anna?