Not talking at all yet

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AnnaRO's picture
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Not talking at all yet

Lyla doesn't talk. At all. She babbles like crazy but as far as actually saying anything we've got nothing. Everything is 'baba' or 'dada'. If she wants something she just points and hollers, 'Dadadada!' She'll point at DH and say 'dada' but she doesn't call me mama, never has. She doesn't talk at all. FIL says it's because we give her whatever she wants and she doesn't have to learn to talk, so apparently we are supposed to deprive her of food, water or toys out of her reach until she learns to verbally ask for them. :roll: I'm beginning to get very concerned about it. Apparently, I was speaking in sentences around 10/11 months and, if you ask MIL, my SIL was practically BORN talking in complex sentences! :roll: :roll: She has her 15 month appointment on Friday, so we'll see what the pedi says.

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I wouldnt worry to much.. I think that all kids are different. My son didnt talk unti he was about 18mths. Those were random words other than mama and dada. Maybe she is saying things but because it isnt perfect you dont hear it. Sometimes I think I hear something and then blow it off because Im like no way did she just say that.. For instance, tonight Natalie is standing by the couch and reaches her arm towards the diapers and she says Di-pas. Doesnt sound exactly like diapers but it is there. Maybe just talking to her and asking her to say stuff you will notice it more.

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I've been told that they just need a word or two by 18 months, so we're not to the concerned point at all. And even then some kids still don't care to say anything till sometime between 18-24 months. I think 24 months is the true point of worry and looking into this deeper. Has her babble gotten any more sophisticated? Like more random sounds even if they don't mean anything? Have you tried any baby signing with her? Has she made up any of her own signs perhaps?
Aiden says, "this." Which he said all the time for like a week and hasn't repeated it since then. The only time he says "mama" is when he's signing "milk" and wants me to nurse him rather than hand him a sippy of milk. "Dada" has no meaning to Aiden.

Interestingly I was FB chatting with a girl I kinda sorta knew in Del Rio from church. I had been replying to a status she had put up about her toddler sleeping. She mentioned talking and said that her son has a vocabulary of 15 words at 15 months, but later in the conversation it became clear that she adds words to his list of vocabulary if he says it once. And at least 10 of those words he only said once. Saying something that sounds like a word once doesn't constitute a word to me. So I think sometimes talking at this stage is a matter of perspective. Also a lot of moms counts words that are made up words the child has, where I probably would never realize that Aiden has made up a word ya know? I'm not always that perceptive. lol.

I'm gonna look up more info.

ETA: Another thought - does she follow directions? Understand anything that you're telling her? My parents realized something was up with my sisters ears because she wasn't talking or following directions. Antibiotics and some tubes and suddenly she was talking up a storm. Blum 3
I'm not too concerned about Aiden because he does clearly hear me.

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"laurensmitty1982" wrote:

Maybe just talking to her and asking her to say stuff you will notice it more.

We do this all the time and if we get a response at all from her it's just a giggle or she'll try to shove her finger in our mouth.

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Oh! Something I keep meaning to try but keep forgetting. There's a thing in NutureShock about increasing vocabulary with nouns. Like picking up a ball and playing with it in your hands and repeating ball over and over. Then handing the object over to the child and as they play with it keep saying ball. Apparently this one on one helps them really figure out that this word means this object and kids that had little vocabulary suddenly had an explosion of vocabulary or at least understanding of the word.
(I think that's what they did. Erin, do you remember more? lol)

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"alwayssmile" wrote:

Has her babble gotten any more sophisticated? Like more random sounds even if they don't mean anything? Have you tried any baby signing with her? Has she made up any of her own signs perhaps?

Nope, just 'dadadada'. I did try to teach her some signs, but she never took to them at all. The only sign she's made up is pointing at stuff, if that counts.

"alwayssmile" wrote:

ETA: Another thought - does she follow directions? Understand anything that you're telling her? My parents realized something was up with my sisters ears because she wasn't talking or following directions. Antibiotics and some tubes and suddenly she was talking up a storm. Blum 3
I'm not too concerned about Aiden because he does clearly hear me.

She really doesn't follow directions very much. If you ask her if she wants a bath she'll go to the bathroom door and grab the doorknob. But she never responds when you ask her to 'come here', or if you ask her to get anything at all. We were at the park today and there was a woman with a 16 month old that we spoke with for a minute. She told her daughter to say bye and she waved and clearly said 'bye bye'. DH told Lyla to say byebye and she stood there she like she never even heard him. (Her hearing is fine)

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"alwayssmile" wrote:

Like picking up a ball and playing with it in your hands and repeating ball over and over. Then handing the object over to the child and as they play with it keep saying ball.

We do this exact thing with her. She has several baseballs she likes to play with and so say 'ball' over and over till we're blue in the face and get nothing out of her at all.

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Yeah, Aiden doesn't come to me when I ask him to at all. But if I ask him if he wants food, he'll go running to the table. :roll:

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Don't worry. Like Jackie said, we're not anywhere near the point where we should even begin to worry. I know lots of 15-16 month olds who don't talk and a very few who's vocabularies are very sophisticated. The range of "normal" is huge in this arena. You can start to cue in on whether or not she understands what you're saying as an indicator of whether or not her hearing and comprehension are OK. I swear, Teagan understands just about everything I say to her but she only has about 3-4 REAL words that actually consistently sound like words. She says hi, bye, mama, and dada/daddy. That's it. She consistently says something that sounds like doddie and titty for doggy and kitty but they're pretty mumbled and difficult to distinguish from the gobbledigoop that's constantly pouring out of her mouth. She randomly busts out things that sound like words or occasionally will repeat something I've just said with the same intonation. For example, we were reading and I said purple over and over again and she said something that sounded a lot like purple (more like turtle). I certainly don't count that as a word in her vocabulary but some parents might just to increase the tally. Teagan says DaDa to everything. She has her own little way of saying DaDa that means "I want that" "Look at that" "What is that" & "Mom, you crazy!".

Its so hard not to worry but that's where we're at at the moment. Jackie's suggestions are good ones to help give you something to work on with her. Nuture Shock said that it helps to bounce objects up and down while saying their names in a sing-songy tone. Apparently the movement and the tone indicate to them that you're talking about that specific object and you're talking to them. I try that all the time with Teagan and so far she just looks at me and says DaDa!

Can I also say that it drives me nuts that all the other kids in Teagan's classroom wave bye-bye and hello and say hi and bye to me but Teagan outright refuses! She'll say hi and bye and wave at anything and everything at home but never at daycare. She'll even wave bye bye and say "Bye bye Daddy!" clear as day at home but just stares at us at daycare. She'll give me kisses/hugs/blow kisses at home. Never at daycare. It makes me worried that they'll tell me she's "behind" the other kids.

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Do you sign with her? That might help close any communication gaps or frustrations you might be having, plus it's a lot of fun! I agree with the others, I think she sounds like she's doing fine. From your other posts, it sounds like she is just really big on the physical stuff - climbing, etc. I think they all have different interests at different stages. When she's ready she'll move on to verbal!

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About signing. While it may seem like Aiden does well with it, it takes weeks of me doing a sign constantly for him to pick up on it and give it back to me. Remember I started at 4 months old. They should pick up on the faster now than then, but still takes awhile. I even make DH give the signs, definitely helps speed the process on along. I always say the word with the sign and try to encourage Aiden to talk with his sign. I've been trying since last summer to get AIden to sign "cat" and he still won't do it. But milk, food, more he gets. My child would rather eat and read than talk or sign.

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Don't worry. The talking thing won't be evaluated until they are 2. By then they *should* be saying about 10 words. DS1 didn't say anything until he was well over 2 and by August last year he was talking above and beyond his normal age range. Now for a boy who didn't start talking until 6 months ago he is WAY ahead of the kids on his pre school class who are the same age. There was actually a time when both my boys had the same number of words in their vocabulary!!!

Signing is a great way of getting them to communicate. I can give you a link to a page in the UK where a man (who is like a god to the under 5's over here) teaches little kids to sign if you want? Both my boys love him. Tobey copies all his signs and after it being the only way DS1 would communicate for a long time I know loads of it. There are also full episodes on youtube if like him after I send the link.

The thing with talking at this age and until they are 2, even 2.5 is that they understand what you are saying and can express their needs either it being verbally or physically. I PT'd DS1 in 3 days before he could say a word!! And the words they say don't need to be what they mean. We were really focused on DS1 saying the right word for thing but when his ST got us to relax about it loads of "words" started coming out. Because of this I know Tobey is talking a lot for his age but it will be things like

"bay boo"-thank you (actually "bay boo" means loads of things-bless you/jig saw...most things with 2 syllables)
"keh"-cat
"deh"-dinner
"jog jog" -yoghurt
"woof woof"-dog

That kind of thing. A few I can remember DS1 saying were
"brum"-car
"eb bar"-elephant
"ange"-orange
(but this was when he was like 30 months old! like I said, almost silence until he was over 2 he just said "uh" and screamed until he was about 26 months old!!)

She is probably saying a lot more than you think Smile

Anyway, if you want to ask any more specific questions feel free to PM me

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Don't worry! But if it bothers you I would focus on that for a month or so and see if you can get her to articulate a little bit more.

I do have times when I know Owen isn't starving but wants something to nibble on, and i always use it as an opportunity to teach him how awesome it is to communicate! I model the word a couple times for him, and if he doesn't say it I just give him a bite anyway. It's easier for me when the boys can tell me what it is they want, so I put a big emphasis on language and communication here.

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I wouldn't worry yet, and like others said she probably is saying a whole bunch it just doesn't sound like anything we would recognize.

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I would totally not worry yet either.
DS1 didn't talk until he was over 2 and that is when the 1 word stuff started. It was literally just before his 2nd birthday when we heard directed mama and dada that were beyond babble. After 2 though the words took off and then the phrases and by 3 he was talking non-stop. It was amazing the speed that he picked up language and now talks and has a vocabulary like he came out already verbal. We did start signing with him when he was tiny and he really never picked up the signs until he became verbal. Like he started talking and signing at 2 so at that point I felt like it was pointless. He did sign 'light' when he was little but that was it and it wasn't very useful.

I have a girl in my preschool that is 2.5 years that is totally non-verbal and only has 1/2 a dozen signs. She does babble some sounds (similar to Odin at 4-6 months) but no words that are communicated toward anything and not even the normal babble like mamama and dadada. She has been going to speech and OT for the speech delay for a while now and comes to us once a week to help with her communication. Its totally interesting to see the difference between a child with a for sure speech delay and just a late talker. DS1's babble and sounds were so much different, with a range of sounds, from ages 1-2 than this little girl's are at age 2.5. Her sounds are more like 1 phoneme sounds (like 'eeeee') instead of consonant vowel combos (like 'ba' or 'mamama') that you hear in most babbles.

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Just had this conversation with the Dr yesterday. He said he would like at least 3 to 5 words by 18most but it isn't something he focuses on until age 2. Nathaniel only has a few solid words. He has other ones but only things we can understand not other people. You don't have anything to worry about.

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Joy, hearing about one of your preschools was very helpful for me! TFS. Smile

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Clara says dada, that's it. I'm not even sure she means dad though. My DD1 was right on time talking. DS didn't talk until he was over two and didn't say mama until he was 2 and a half. His speech has been on his own terms the whole time though, push him too hard and he clams up. I had to finally just start using more words around him, not directed at him, to get his vocabulary to increase, he's incredibly stubborn. And it seems that Clara is following the same rotten path as her brother lol. She just looks at us and giggles when we try to get her to repeat words. But she can go to the highchair when I mention food so she knows. My dr was a little worried about her vocabulary at her 15 month appt but only because her head size went from the 10th percentile to off the chart. She's fine, I assured him, the head size and the stubbornness is all hereditary.

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Off the chart as in too big now? Or below? Just curious. I'm assuming it went under otherwise that would be a hell of a head growth!!

Simon says tons that I can decipher but if you ask DH he would say he barely says anything. You just have to remember that pronuncation doesnt count. So they could be saying waaaay more than you realize. It was only today that DH finally heard that Simon replies "i dont know" when you ask him something. Because it sounds like "i du na". And he's been saying it for a couple of months now. You may just not be recognizing it.

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Those of you with talkers need to video them talking and share it! I'm wondering if DS is saying more than what I hear. I hear nothing other than an occasional "this" (picked that back up a couple of days ago) and "mama." I wonder if I'd hear the words some of you are hearing from your kids in videos. lol

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Videos would be great. I've learned that Lyla's 'baba' means different things based on inflection. If she says it quietly or whispers it then it means she wants her sippy of milk. If he says 'baba' where the emphasis is on the second syllable and she says it loud and points down the hall she's asking for a bath. She'll also start tugging on her clothes. She just started that about a week or so ago.

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"AnnaRO" wrote:

I've learned that Lyla's 'baba' means different things based on inflection.

Yes! That's exactly what Teagan does with 'dada'. Just in the last few weeks she started picking up a few more signs ('all done' & 'water') in addition to 'more' and she was saying dada different ways when she signed each one. In a matter of a week or so though she started saying things that more resemble the word that goes with the sign. So, when she signs 'all done' she'll say "ah-da" and when she signs 'water' she'll say '"da-ta". It happened really fast. I think the first step towards talking is realizing that the sounds coming out of their mouths can be rearranged into words that have meaning. Using different inflections is definitely a step in the right direction.

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"KittyRN" wrote:

Off the chart as in too big now? Or below? Just curious. I'm assuming it went under otherwise that would be a hell of a head growth!!

It went off the top of the chart. I should upload a picture of her head growth chart, it's quite hilarious actually.

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That's strange. They probably measured something wrong along the line somewhere then. It's really odd for a head to suddenly grow that much. Maybe whomever measured it did it wrong, like at a different spot??? Or she is just gaining some super smart brain! LOL!!

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"KittyRN" wrote:

That's strange. They probably measured something wrong along the line somewhere then. It's really odd for a head to suddenly grow that much. Maybe whomever measured it did it wrong, like at a different spot??? Or she is just gaining some super smart brain! LOL!!

She's inheriting her dads super fat head Smile

The nurse measured it and then the dr measured it twice, the nurse was a bit off but not by much, the dr got the same thing twice. i'll upload a picture of her chart.

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I would video Ronin talking but it can be sporadic and it's probbaly only me understanding it. He has quite a few words though and keeps getting more because he has decided he wants to be 2 like the big kids in his class.

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I totally want to see that chart for a chuckle on how different babies can be!

See, that's why I want videos! I want to hear what you hear. Maybe it'll help me realize that Aiden is saying more than what I can decipher. Like even though I won't know what word(s) he's saying, the fact that you know it's word(s) may help some of us who hear nothing.

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I'll try to get Simon saying something, but he usually does not do what I want him to do when I turn the camera on. LOL!

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Speaking of talking...lol....we were watching big bang theory and you know at the end where they say "BANG!"? Simon i guess picked up on that and kept yelling BANG for several minutes after. LOL! Little weiner. But he rarely says what you ask him to. He listens to tv more!

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OMG that is so cute!

I should try getting one of Lucas talking. He hasn't been doing it on demand lately although last night he would not stop saying kitty.

I think he might have been saying thank you the other day. I kept saying thank you and he was saying "eh gooooo" back ROFL I could probably def get some video of him going "ndatndatndatndat" when he wants something. He says that all day long.

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I'll see what vids I can get/find of Tobey talking. I think there is one of him when he was about 8 months old says "nana" (banana) but I'll have to see what I can find Smile

Also I know the second I get the camera out he'll stop talking Wink