small rant and ob appointment update..

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Newlywed630's picture
Joined: 07/20/07
Posts: 770
small rant and ob appointment update..

Well, I went to see my ob yesterday and he said that my spotting is completly normal. Congradulated me many times for my weight loss and asked for tips! LOL I love my ob, he is amazing.

as far as my rant goes.
I do not have middle child syndrom, I promise! I have a jerk for a older brother and my younger brother while a amazing person, is a spoiled baby.. I really feel bad about saying that but it is true.. not that I blame him if I was handed everything, I would do the same thing..

Yesterday my mom was gonna watch the kids for me while I went to the doctor. My appointment was at 9:45 and she calls me at 8:50 to tell me that my older brother called and "before she could catch him to tell him not to":rolleyes: was gonna drop my nephew off. My brother works construction work, while his wife has a full time job. She said, I will just tell him to drop him off at your grandma's house. My grandma is 80 and doesn't need strep throat either! So then she suggests that to him and he got all pissed off and told her that he would drop him off at 11. I told her that my apointments with my doctor take a hour already and that I may not be back by then.. so then she tells him and I guess since he had a minute to cool off because "gasp for the first time my mom isn't kissing his butt!" he said that it didn't matter. While all this was going down, my mom had the "oh poor him" tone to her voice. It pissed me off! I actually told her the second time she called me that I would just reschedule but that I was having issues and was worried about it, but whatever.. that finally clicked something in her head to finally act as if she cared at all.
It hurts me so badly that my own parents treat me this way. I mean, I matter too. I shouldn't have to reschedule a doctors apointment that she has known about for 2 weeks just so my brother can drop off his really sick kid with no notice at all. This isn't the first time. My mom has called me before while dh and I were on a date night to tell me to "come get your kids" because my brother was bringing my sick nephew over. I am not scared of my kids getting sick or anything but that was the time that Trevor couldn't because his surgery was in a few days. They missed most of Trevors birthday party because my nephew had a baseball game Sad Which really hurt, he will only ever have one 4th birthday! and I didn't even bother to ask for my mom to watch Chloe today because I already know that she is my brothers baby sitter number one.. so I get to drag two kids along to sign him up for preschool today.
My dad too apartently does not like dh's talk about us moving into a trailer some day. He is all pissy with me because of that (or maybe it is because my brother missed work for stupid me, who knows) I really don't see how it is any of his business. He told me if I shopped less that we would have more money for a decent house :o well, since I am not handed ANYTHING it is kinda hard.. my kids could go without but I am not that kinda parent! My parents take my nephew shopping for things like clothes and stuff and if I happen to come around my dad tells me "I know you take care of your kids" so since my kids get taken care of by me that means they don't have to care about them.. they can go without. Same rule applies for Christmas. While my nephew is still opening gifts upon gifts, Trevor is done already watching! This was before I had two. It has always been this way. My dad has never offered to help me out.. not that he needs to. I don't give a crap. It just pisses me off that he is for my brother 100% but if we really need his help it is always on a pay me back soon type of deal. I know that we had a family and we should support it, I do. We do, even if we are broke we do. I am no way saying that I think my dad NEEDS to help me.. I am just annoyed with how he acts towards my brother and then how he turns around and acts this way towards me.
I love my parents, they do help us out SOMETIMES.. well by they I mean my mom, but it is not often. I just feel like they shouldn't spoil only one grandchild. That isn't how is works! I guess in their world it does.
Sorry this was longer than it needed to be.. I just needed to get that out. I hope ya'll don't mind.

alwayssmile's picture
Joined: 08/26/07
Posts: 14483

:grouphug:

Glad your appt went well.

AnnaRO's picture
Joined: 07/06/08
Posts: 7033

I'm glad that your appointment went well and your doc isn't concerned about anything. And congrats again on the weight loss! In a couple of weeks I'll be trying to do the same thing.

I'm sorry that your parents play favorites with their kids and grandkids. I hate to see stuff like that. My IL's baby DH's oldest sister and it really annoys DH's other sister that they are so interested in taking care of the oldest one. But in their defense the older one is a MESS all the time and always making really poor decisions. DH's other sister is well off and lives far away, but she wishes they would at least come visit her like they did the older when she lived far away too. It's not fair to you that they prioritize one of your brothers over you. If they have prearranged plans to watch your kids then your brother should be SOL, IMO.

KittyRN's picture
Joined: 02/03/09
Posts: 1260

ERG! I hate family crap like that!!! Sorry you have to deal with it. I also get the shaft from my family. We are the only ones who live far away, and also in need the most (though we do ok). When my parents come here they buy all sorts of stuff for the other 6 grandchildren, then gripe about how they have no money and cant buy Simon much. I just want to back hand them. He's my son and MY number one, the other grandkids can eat crap for all I care. LOL! (not really but you know what I mean). They'd rather my mcdonalds for the other kids then say, help me buy him shoes he NEEDS!!

Newlywed630's picture
Joined: 07/20/07
Posts: 770

Sad I hate that families have to be this way. I don't even bother arguing with them about if they call and say come get your kid, I am not gonna leave my babies somewhere they are unwelcome. I don't know if that is my fault for not sticking up for myself or what. I see it as they are doing me a favor so I can't complain. The time we were already in the car on the way to our date night and they called me saying to come back and pick up the kids (this was also planned btw) my brother called and they immediately agreed to watch my nephew. Their excuse? Because they "know I take great care of my kids"... really? My brother would just take my nephew (he is 6) to the party they are going to anyway.. which is crap but whatever. They are right in a way but still it is messed up because I never know if my plans are set or not.. oh well. My mom did offer to help pay for Trevor's private school if for some reason he isn't accepted into pre-k.. that was nice of her. Go figure the day I complain to ya'll Smile
Anna I will be here to cheer you on!! I feel so much better! I wanna say I am down 25lbs almost now but I have two scales and the one that says I am heavier I believe. Even though I originally started with the other one so I guess I should go by it.. either way I fit into a pair of blue jeans -comfortably- from high school!! YAY!

alwayssmile's picture
Joined: 08/26/07
Posts: 14483

"Newlywed630" wrote:

either way I fit into a pair of blue jeans -comfortably- from high school!! YAY!

Yahoo

WTG! Keep up the hard work!

AnnaRO's picture
Joined: 07/06/08
Posts: 7033

"Newlywed630" wrote:

I fit into a pair of blue jeans -comfortably- from high school!! YAY!

That is awesome. I have a pair of jeans that is about 10 years old that I am aiming to fit into. I'll have to lose about 40 to get there. . .

Newlywed630's picture
Joined: 07/20/07
Posts: 770

Thanks Jackie and Anna!
Anna you can do it. It just takes about 6 weeks or so to really settle on a lifestyle change. Those first few weeks are hard but you'll get used to it. I never thought is fit into these pants again. Now if only the size 12's fit Smile I bet ill still be dieting because I want to get down to 130. I'll be happy to help you once your ready. We can keep eachother motivated Smile

laurensmitty1982's picture
Joined: 07/30/06
Posts: 1117

Ashley, that sucks but I can say that my mom does simliar things with grandchildren.. She favors more than others. Its really pretty sad, and over time I have come to the point that its their loss.. BUt I really think that you should be honest more.. It may make her realize that she is favoring your brother/brothers child over your and yours.

My sister has been really heartbroken since christmas with my mother and is finally starting to move on from the idea that her kids will have a great grandma or grandparents. She knows that its just going to be her and her dh. I realized this 10 years ago so I didnt have to suffer for so long. Dh parents are similar but more in being involved. They typically spend the same amount on our child but never spend time with them or can babysit so I had to deal with that a few years ago.

My new mind set is, well when they are old and grey and lonely it is because of themselves. THey are teh grandparents and its up to them to step up and be involved and I think there should be no favortism because kids notice that..

Newlywed630's picture
Joined: 07/20/07
Posts: 770

Lauren I completely agree. I hate that I can't ever depend on them when my brother is involved.
But your right. It's their loss not mine. Sorry you've gotta deal with this too.

KatieWantsABaby's picture
Joined: 06/19/07
Posts: 229

It sucks when families are like that FOR SURE. Mine are the only grandkids, and because my dad favors my brother, and my mom is... well... yeah. and Dh's parents favor HIS brother my kids get the short end of the stick so to speak.

However! CONGRATS on the weight loss!!! I've been using the ItWorks! wraps and LOVE them. I've lost a bunch of the loose skin that has been hanging around despite my best efforts working out and eating well with them.

KatieWantsABaby's picture
Joined: 06/19/07
Posts: 229

It sucks when families are like that FOR SURE. Mine are the only grandkids, and because my dad favors my brother, and my mom is... well... yeah. and Dh's parents favor HIS brother my kids get the short end of the stick so to speak.

However! CONGRATS on the weight loss!!! I've been using the ItWorks! wraps and LOVE them. I've lost a bunch of the loose skin that has been hanging around despite my best efforts working out and eating well with them.