chat x34

620 posts / 0 new
Last post
irishgirl's picture
Joined: 04/10/07
Posts: 1043
chat x34

Finally and stuff. Smile
also, my children are awesome and Egan sat in the high chair and fiona and rowynn helped me clean the kitchen. So that was nice. Smile

Joined: 07/21/09
Posts: 1198

That last chat thread seemed to take FOREVER!!!!

Yay for the kids being awesome and helping clean!!

Joined: 05/04/09
Posts: 1316

Yeah I think the last thread took like over 4 months. I think this one will go faster. The chatting seems to have picked back up.

Yeah I think the world is designed for like 2 parents and 2 kids which is kind of stupid. I agree about all the different toys and crap too. You really thought that out Ann-Marie lol. The stuff already drives me insane with one kid and having to store some of the baby stuff. I just dont' have room for all that.

I got off early today! Yay. But it sucks b/c Tom has to work 5-9.

kilahmaree's picture
Joined: 08/28/09
Posts: 951

Aaah! High chair! Jaime put Lio in the high chair for the first time this morning and I was like "Whoa! Why did it *not* dawn on me to do that earlier?" I mean, I know H was in one before this, because she was drinking from a sippy at 4.5 months, and she'd been playing with it for a while before that in the high chair...I feel like I am so behind with Lio. But I don't *want* him to be bigger yet either. I'm not ready for each new step. Jaime was lamenting that H could sit up unassisted at 4 mos and Lio's so not there, and I was like, Waaah! Let him be a baby!

lmh101979's picture
Joined: 07/05/09
Posts: 966

I know what you mean about the world being designed for a family of 4. Try buying stocking hangers for the fireplace, they all come in sets of 4, or you have to buy individually. Needless to say, our stockings were hung in the general vicinity of the fireplace with care. Maybe next year. I asked a friend of mine who has 3 kids what I should know about having 3 and she said that it was always loud. Smile I think I'm pretty used to that by now. I can't imagine that it can get any louder. Smile 3 was always our number. I got super lucky and got the spacing I wanted and so far have gotten the sex's I wanted as well. We'll see if Fin cooperates and grows a penis as instructed. Wink
Tomorrow is a super exciting day, Belle starts her new preschool, MA has her first mommy and me gym class, I have mentoring, and my first 2 week appointment. Fun! I am actually really happy because hanging around the house makes me a little crazy. We'll see how I feel tomorrow afternoon.
Oh and YAY for a new thread!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I'm so sorry I haven't been able to post as much lately here... I read as much as I can but Markus is such a fussy guy and I am so busy!! When I'm nursing I'm able to read and make the odd one finger post, it's slowly getting better as he's getting older. Clara was such an easy baby and it is so much different having a new baby with a toddler!!! Combined with the fact he never slept the first 12 weeks (I completely wigged out at 10 weeks and was crying all the time from complete and utter exhaustion. Do you know what it's like to get 1-3 hours of sleep per night for 12 weeks??! It's HORRID!!) I'm just starting to feel like myself again now that he's been sleeping 7 hours at night for the last two weeks. I didn't want to start getting back into a fitness routine until I was getting regular sleep and the treadmill kicked my *** tonight, so looking forward to getting back in shape!

Kilah, Markus enjoys sitting in the highchair but his favourite thing is still to be carried around the house. He's definately a "slug" compared to Clara, really doesn't make any effort with tummy time (just lays face down), not the best neck control and definately no sitting ability. He needs a lot of stimulation though and if he's on the floor I have to entertain him the whole time or he cries and goes red in the face. I can't wait for him to be older... I'm so sick of the breastfeeding honestly as it takes sooooo much time away from the other kids. I feel like I have no time for anyone, nor myself Sad Clara was sick for the first time ever today and woke up with a high fever. She laid around all day and I barely had any time to comfort her as I was so busy with the baby. She seems to be back to normal now though Smile

I'll try to post more and keep up with everyone Smile

Joined: 06/05/09
Posts: 313

Two times.... TWO TIMES NOW I have hit that purple button of death and deleted my response...

CRY I guess I won't chat with you ladies tonight!!!!

irishgirl's picture
Joined: 04/10/07
Posts: 1043

hahhaha purple button of death. I just had to LOL at that. I have to finish getting us ready so I can take Egan to the doctor. Rowynn doesn't have a fever so I don't guess I'm taking her. I'll take her this afternoon if the fever starts again. but i'm not taking her and saying "well she's run a fever randomly for the last 4 days (okay, maybe like..6?) but she doesn't have one now, so fix her.
bah. stupid sickness.

Joined: 05/04/09
Posts: 1316

Whoa that's crazy Sally, I'm glad to hear Markus is finally sleeping for you. Boo for Clara being sick. Yay for being able to get back on the treadmill!

Ann-Marie, hopefully Rowynn's fever is gone for good.

Brittany, that sucks. you should try again to post Smile

Lindsay-let us know how preschool goes for Belle. I'm thinking about her today!

My visit got canceled tonight too. I'm starting to worry about my hours this period. I'm probably going to have to testify at a termination trial coming up in a couple weeks and I'm really freaking nervous.

kilahmaree's picture
Joined: 08/28/09
Posts: 951

Sally - I am glad thing seem to be getting better for you. I'm glad Markus is sleeping better. Lio doesn't really sleep at night anymore, ha ha. He sleeps from about 8-11...then he nurses all night. But, eh, what can you do? lol. I'm sorry that Clara is sick, but yay for the treadmill! That's impressive! I'm doin stellar if I can get a 20 min workout in 2-3xs a week, ha ha.

Lindsay, I hope Belle likes her new preschool!

Whitney - whats a termination trial? Like terminating parental rights?

So we went to a playdate this morning, and I freaking love this group of moms! They are so nice.

We are going o Aruba in March, just a few days later than we intended. So we will ge home like 1 day before H's birthday.

Speaking of which, I have decided I'm going to do an owl theme for her birthday because I found a kickass cookies and cream cupcake recipe and you make owls on top of the cupcakes with Oreo's and M&M's (which Halloway calls her "yummy nummy's!" - the natureal version, whatever they're called) and I think H would ge a kick out of that. I can't figure out *how* to do her party this year. Do I invite our family and friends like I did for her first party, do I invite her little friends, both? I'm not sure what you do here.

Joined: 05/04/09
Posts: 1316

Kilah-yes that's exactly what it is. I think you should invite a few little friends, how cute!! On the other hand you might not want to do all that esp. right after you get back from vacation.

lmh101979's picture
Joined: 07/05/09
Posts: 966

I will always think of it as the purple button of death from now on!

Belle did good today, but this is a MUCH more laid back program and I don't think they expect to much work quietly time. I really had to laugh when my dear friend suggested homeschool. Me and Belle 24/7 would be a horror story for us both. Maybe MA since she is more laid back, but honestly I need time in the day without people in my face.
Which brings me to Sally. OMG girl, I would have lost my mind LONG before 10 weeks. Sleep deprivation is a form of torture outlawed by the Geneva Convention so it must be really bad. I honestly can't imagine how hard that is. I'm glad that things are getting better, but that really sucks about Clara getting sick. I truly hate sick babies. MA has only had what I think are allergies so far and I have no desire to see what it's like to have a truly sick one. Hugs and come back whenever you can. Oh, and it sucks that he is being such a little stinker because he is just as cute as can be! Love the FB pics!
Whitney, why are you nervous about the termination hearing? Is it just the whole being in front of a judge thing, or are the circumstances making you nervous. I would think that it would always be nerve wracking to be a part of that. You picked a tough profession my friend. I hope your hours work out. It seems like you are always feast or famine in your job.
Kilah, I think you should only invite her little friends whose parents you like. If you invite her whole playgroup chances are 90% won't come anyway, at least that has been my experience so you can really only count on family.
Speaking of birthdays... I don't think I am going to do one for MA this year. Yes, I know, I suck at life. But it will be 11 days until my due date and she will NEVER know! Just the idea of putting it all together makes me feel tired let alone hosting it. Originally Jason said he would do it, but now that it's crunch time he's backing out as well. Do you think I'm totally going to parenting hell or just purgatory?

Joined: 06/05/09
Posts: 313

Ok try number 3

I don't think it's bad not to do a party! Especially when your 9 months pregnant Smile

I'm lying in bed sick today. I was up all night throwing up. This is the pits!!

I can't remember what else I wrote... We had some family drama at Christmas. According to my sil I drug Ava and that's why she is well behaved and a good sleeper. Nice right?

We are planning a trip to Dallas for Easter. 24 hour drive. We will stop over night but I'm not looking forward to that. But we will get to see baby Asher so it's good.

irishgirl's picture
Joined: 04/10/07
Posts: 1043

Kilah, that's awesome that you had a good playgroup. You can do either with the party..whatever you want. I really don't want to doa "friend" party for Fiona for so many reasons this year, but I feel awful if I don't. Bah.

Whitney, I agree with everything that Lindsay said. Wink

Lindsay, I'm the same way with Fiona. She needs too much that I can't give her. She's too much like me, and we need time apart. I could totally homeschool Rowynn, but that wouldn't be "fair". Wink

Lindsay, I would order her a cake and invite close family over and be done with it. Have someone pick up some chick fil a or something. That's what we usually do.

Brittany I'm sorry that you've been so sick. ;( Also boo to your SIL, that makes absolutely no sense that she would think you were drugging Ava. So dumb.

So Egan is gigantic. Like 87% for weight and 45% for height..haha. I also put some of his robeez on today (because it was freezing this morning and i hate socks) and they fit PERFECT and they're 0-6m. Like he may have another few weeks where he can wear them. He got his shots and he was mad earlier, but is sleeping again.
Rowynn never started runninga fever again. I asked them about her fever and they said if it was still going on Friday to bring her in so we could check for a UTI, but it was fine to wait till then.

lmh101979's picture
Joined: 07/05/09
Posts: 966

Ann-marie, I was thinking teeth for R, but I guess that's why I'm not a Dr. Smile And cake and chic-fil-a would be perfect for her birthday. Since they both got so much crap for Christmas my mom didn't give MA the bitty baby, so she will get that and some clothes for it and that's about it. Oh, and another YGG video, I am loving having one for the car, now we can have one in the car and one in the house. And how funny on Egan being so big! I think it's better to have larger children, bigger stomachs and more sleeping, but sad that your maybe last is growing up so much. I fully think there should be a pause button on all kids.
Brittany, your SIL seriously didn't say that. Seriously? Maybe it's because you and Dad are both nice, low key people that you had a nice low key daughter? Just a guess here, but she is high strung, not very nice and her kids are just like her? I know what B's problem is and she is just like me! The apple and the tree and all. Blah, I hope you didn't let that noise get to you. And I hope you feel better, you seem miserable and that is VERY unlike you.
OK, I'm finally uploading my terrible New Year's pics to photobucket so I will add them to the pics thread.

Ladybugsteph's picture
Joined: 06/21/06
Posts: 2975

Hey everybody! I took a quick glance at the thread to try to get caught up with everyone.

Lindsay, I know that Belle was having some trouble at the other school, but I missed exactly what happened. It's ok if you don't want to repeat it. I'm just glad that it seems like the new school will be a good fit.

Man, I think the sickies are going around. At least one person in this house has been sick for the past 4 weeks. Jackson wound up at the doc today, because of a fever since after nap on Sunday, and then he started stumbling around this afternoon. Fluid in the ears. Nothing too bad, but still got meds for it. Hopefully after he's well, we'll get a little break. Something's telling me that Carson's next though. I hope we didn't pick up anything else while we were at the doc today...

Other than that, things have just been trucking along. Same 'ol, same 'ol around here. Drew's working hard, the kids are hard on me, I don't get many breaks. It was really nice having Drew at home for 10 days during Christmas. He doesn't know how much his presence helps. Something is telling me that he finally realizes exactly why I need breaks once a week. lol

kilahmaree's picture
Joined: 08/28/09
Posts: 951

Sometimes I just wish I had one person who I could call and was there for me anytime, unconditionally. Today has taken such a toll on me. Everyone just kept crying. All day. Every time poor Lio would fall asleep, Halloway would wake him up. She herself only took a 45 minute nap. Finally, around 5 I got him to sleep (he hadn't slept more than 40 total minues since 730 this morning) and then Halloway took all the wipes out of the container and threw them all over the floor. As soon as I started to clean them up she started shrill screaming and immediately woke Lio up. And then I spanked her. Yes, I fail as a mother. Like I want to physically be sick because of this. So then I sat on the floor and cried right along with everyone for a little bit. When did this become my life? SEriously? I have everything I've ever possibly wanted - a beautiful house, an awesome husband, and most importantly, two beautiful, healthy, happy children. So why can't I just be happy? Why do I hear my children scream and immediately go into panic mode? I just don't know how I'm supposed to do this. I want with all my hear to be a good mom to these babies and I just feel like I'm letting them down and doing everything wrong. And I have no one to talk to. Everyone I know with kids just tells me how freaking fantastic it is all the freaking time, like they've never even for a second just hated being a mom, so I know that my feelings just aren't normal. And I didn't feel like this before I had Lio. And it's not him, and it's not his fault, I love him, but a part of me just wants everything to go back to how it was before there ever was a Lio because I was happy then. I know I can't go back in time and I just have to do this, but I just don't know how things got so messed up for me. I'm sorry for the vent, and I'm sure I'm not making any of you think too highly of me right now, but I just honestly have no one else to talk to.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Kilah, I'm sorry but you are waaaaay too hard on yourself!! Reading what you just wrote pretty much describes my days lately and I have more help than you with my older kids and Chris. I can really relate to the shrill screaming, it seems everytime I just put Markus down or he falls asleep Clara decides to go ape sh!t and wake him up... then he's fussy and I have to start all over again with nursing and putting him down. I think it's from being so exhausted and not getting much of a break.

I find the days where I get no me time or a chance to get caught up is when I feel the most frustrated and anxious. Chris is home all the time now and also with a 13 year old I get quite a bit of help and I'm still feeling frazzeled most of the time. We have set meal times so I'm doing a lot of cooking/baking and sometimes I feel like that's all I'm doing all day long.... nursing, cooking, cleaning, laundry, tidying up, etc. We stopped putting Clara down for naps and now put her to bed at 7:30 (Chris put her down for me) she's usually asleep after 10 minutes and then he takes Markus so I can have a bath or get caught up on whatever, it's a lifesaver for me. I think it's perfectly normal to feel the way you are feeling, a baby and a toddler is HARD and I think even more so if you don't have anyone to bounce off of or have daily help.

Most people never admit to how things really are so that ones that tell you how fantastic it is are probably the ones that lose it the most behind closed doors.... please do not think you are alone on this. I keep telling myself it will get better, with having a 13 year old and 8 year old I KNOW it gets better because they are sooooo easy and pretty much do everything themselves now (they put away their own laundry and can make their own breakfasts, etc.)

Brittany, sorry to hear you are so sick, do you have a bug or do you think it's possibly morning sickness!??! I was so sick with Markus, I'll never forget that feeling of being sick, it's horrible! Hope you feel better soon.

Clara only had a fever yesterday and by last night she was fine again so it was very short. I have this horrible ingrown nail on my left foot that is so painful I can't even bear weight on it. I just slabbed lots of orajel on it for pain relief! I stubbed my toe a couple weeks ago and the nail cracked and then it grew into the skin, I pulled out part of it at the top but it's still bad, hoping I don't have to go see a doctor about this Sad Anyone else ever get that? I think I've had it once before but it resolved on its own.

JDBabyHopes's picture
Joined: 02/16/09
Posts: 1149

Kilah, I don't post on here often anymore, but I had to jump in here and give you a big :bigarmhug:!!!

Like Sally said, you are entirely way too hard on yourself! I guarantee you that every single human being that has ever been a mother has hated her life at some point, and done things she regrets when it comes to childrearing. You are totally NOT alone and your feelings are NOT abnormal! I can say that from the bottom of my heart. I know a little over a year ago (before the Sleep Lady godsend), we were having a really rough time of getting Owen to sleep on his own (it was this torturous routine of rocking and swaying, sometimes for hours). There were days and days and days where he wouldn't nap and would just scream the moment I thought he was asleep in my arms. Those were really REALLY hard weeks for me, emotionally. I literally called Darin a few times bawling that I needed help, and he actually took off work the rest of the day to come home and let me feel sane again. And I used to cry to him that I hated my life and that I probably wasn't cut out to be a SAHM. I'll be the first to admit to you that I probably put Owen down in his crib a few times a little harder than I should have, and just walked out of his room to scream while he cried. It was awful. And you seriously feel like a crazy person who probably shouldn't be alone with small children. Or at least, I did. And I will also tell you that I *still* feel guilty about how I sometimes handled/felt some of those long afternoons. I obviously never hurt him, and know you would never hurt H or Lio, but the guilt feels as if you DID. I totally get that.

Seriously, if you ever need someone to talk to, we're all here. Hell, I will even PM you my cell if you want it and you can call me whenever you need to. I'm so sorry you're feeling so alone and I hope you things start looking up for you really soon.

Hang in there! :bigarmhug:

ETA: And anyone who tells you that motherhood is fan-freaking-tastic 24/7, 365 days a year is seriously delusional, or on a really high dosage of happy meds!

irishgirl's picture
Joined: 04/10/07
Posts: 1043

Kilah, I think Jen's post was really great. I went into parenting saying I would never spank, and I have to say I have. I know that hopeless feeling, and that feeling like you failed and you have no idea what else to do and you feel that is THE END of the line and you HAVE to do something. It's not something you ever want to do or admit and I get that. It feels horrible and terrible and you know it's wrong (and in the end, it doesn't work, at least with us).

I think you might be trying to do too much, feeling overwhelmed, not taking enough time for yourself. I know it's hard, but if you just sit in a quiet house doing nothing before bed it will help. or if they fall asleep when you're in the car (I know H has trouble in the car, but if it magically happens) drive around and listen to music.

Also, I get like that when I feel like EVERYONE needs me and all the touching and stuff gets to me. I finally realized I CAN'T help everyone and someone will cry. Someone will make a mess, it won't get cleaned up and someone will make another mess. Someone will get hurt, and hopefully we all eat. I count it a good day if we eat and the house isn't burned down.

I realized before Egan was born I was screaming a LOT and I didn't want them to look back and remember me and think "man, my mom sure did yell a lot". I had to make a conscious decision to stop and breathe. I would tell Fiona really calmly that I didn't want to yell at her and be "mean" but I really didn't like her behavior. I'd try to talk it out with her, which she usually won't entertain at all, but at least I tried. I usually felt better if I told her how I was feeling too, and i think it helped her see that we use words to express our emotions calmly.
I realized the other day I haven't screamed in a LONG time. I don't know what it was, but something clicked between us.

Anyway, EVERYONE feels like that, don't let anyone tell you differently. It's just no one talks about it. I don't want to admit I'm "wrong" or I "failed" (none of which is true) so I definitely don't say any of it. PLus saying it out loud makes it a little more real, which is terrible too.

You can ALWAYS message me on facebook . I'm usually near the computer and if not my phone has messenger on it and I'll respond (unless we're asleep. ;)) You're not alone, don't feel like it. Big hugs and I hope you get some rest and feel better tomorrow.

Joined: 07/21/09
Posts: 1198

Kilah, you are not alone or crazy!!! Those feelings are totally normal and we have all been there! There are always going to be people who just won't admit it to others. I have sat and cried with crying kids, I have spanked and i have put kids in their beds a little harder than i should have and walked out of the room with them screaming and locked myself in the bathroom to scream and cry myself. Calista was up till 5am last night/this morning and spent the majority of the day screaming. Dusty told her no to something tonight and she took an entire bag of chips and threw them across the room! They were everywhere. I seriously had the thought go through my head of thinking I was crazy for ever wanting kids! There are days that I wish I could go back in time before I had kids and actually had time for myself! There are days that I cry in the bathtub with both kids in there because all i want to do i have a bath by myself. I know it is hard not to beat yourself up for having those feelings but please understand that you are not alone. I also have no friends with kids that understand and Dusty doesn't get it either so most of my feelings end up inside like yours. Please feel free to PM me if you want.

Joined: 05/04/09
Posts: 1316

The other ladies are so right Kilah. Sorry I wasn't on here earlier to respond better. I think they said a lot of very true things. I definitely agree that every mom has these moments and your feelings are not abnormal. I know you've mentioned that you're feeling like you have ppd though, and I think it may really help to see someone about that. On the other hand I don't think your frustrations are out of line with reality. You are doing a very hard job and you are by yourself a lot. I'm sorry that you feel you dont' have anyone IRL that you can really talk to, I can relate to that as well. We are all here for you but I know it's not the same as having someone there who really gets it and all. Either way, it's healthy to be open about it and I commend you on that. I sure hope you feel better soon.

Joined: 05/04/09
Posts: 1316

Lindsay-Yeah I'm just nervous about being on the stand and answering questions about my client in front of her and all. Also, I worry about what if there was more I could have done. I won't get into details but it's a very intense case. Yeah my hours are all over the place and even though it usually evens out it drives me insane. I'm thinking about applying for a different job where I would actually be working for the state and I would be one of the people who goes in and investigates reports made to CPS. It would have better benefits and a regular schedule. I think I qualify and they also do extensive training. I don't know how many openings there are but I know they're hiring for it right now and I'm going to apply.

Brittany-that's crazy. Your family seems to have a lot of drama. And your SIL is naming her baby Asher?? Gah I love that name.

lmh101979's picture
Joined: 07/05/09
Posts: 966

You ladies are all making me cry with all the support and HONESTY you have all laid out there. Please add this to the pile. I feel at least once a week like I am not cut out for this and that I am being a bad mom. Ann-Marie I commend you on taking the scream out of your voice, and I am going to try tomorrow to use my words to tell Belle for the 100th time to stop being so _______ whatever. You are all so right, except for walking out of the room screaming. I like to do that into my pillow in my room. I am confident that all of your friends that say how fantastic motherhood always is are delusional or have a nanny. There is no way that spending all your time with tiny children TOUCHING you all day long wouldn't make anyone crazy. And no man can understand what it's like, I don't care how sexist that sounds I truly believe it.
You can always call or PM ANY of us Kilah and we would talk you down in a heartbeat. You know I'm almost always on the computer, or at least have FB open. If you just want to call to talk about the weather, or what going on The Little Couple, just to have an adult to talk to that doesn't need anything. You are SO not alone. I don't know how such an amazing group of people ended up having babies in March (february) of 2010, but there you have it, luck of the draw. We are here and most importantly we understand. No one but another mom can know how much you can love your kids and how much you could also punt them into next week.

JDBabyHopes's picture
Joined: 02/16/09
Posts: 1149

"lmh101979" wrote:

No one but another mom can know how much you can love your kids and how much you could also punt them into next week.

ROFL That is awesome, and so true. That sums up everything in motherhood!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I just found out about this story, can you all please take a moment and sign this petition to help this little two year old girl go back to her adoptive parents?? She was just sent to her birth father, he abandoned her at birth and she has never seen him before, she must be so traumatized right now!! This is absolute child abuse and makes me so mad!

http://www.change.org/petitions/save-veronica

Joined: 06/05/09
Posts: 313

So sorry kilah. The first 6 months of Ava's life were the hardest months of my life. I felt so guilty because I was so depressed and cried all the time. I remember bawling and wondering how I'd make it through the day and each time she cried it was like daggers. I remember feeling like everyone had it easier and were better than me. I still feel really guilty about it. I feel like I wasn't really there. I wish I could have enjoyed that time instead of being so sad. I hope it gets better

Also it is very strange ive been sick 4 days and oddly enough each day I feel better by 1 or 2. I don't think there's even much of a chance I could be pregnant but if I'm sick again tomorrow morning I'll dig up a test. I think I have some on hand. I haven't poas since the chemical pregnancy, I have like PTSD over poas lol

Edit. I hope this isn't morning sickness because I don't think I could do even one more day of this. Plus taking care of Ava. It would kill me.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Brittany, my morning sickness with Markus was like death, I honestly don't know how I survived and can't believe I was begging for a csection just to end it all. I hope you are pregnant though and if it is morning sickness it doesn't stick around!!! Fingers crossed!!

kilahmaree's picture
Joined: 08/28/09
Posts: 951

Wow. Thanks ladies. I don't even know what to say. You guys are incredible. Yesterday was terribly overwhelming and hard for me, and I'm glad you don't all hate me because of it. Wink It means a *lot* to me that you guys are there, figuratively or litterally.

Ann-marie - I like your no yelling resolution. I really should try that. I feel like I yell a lot, especially when I get frustrated with H. And especially because nothing phases her. At all. Yelling. Time-out. Etc. Maybe she will listen better if I'm more calm.

I meant to say before life made me crazy yesterday:

Lindsay - I don't think no party is bad at all! We weren't going to do a party in general this year, but then that dang mommy guilt started getting to me. Jaime still thinks I'm kidding about doing a party for H, ha ha.

Brittany - I hope you start feeling better. I've only been sick once since having kids, and luckily and was only throughout the night, I couldn't imagine being sick during the day, and for that long.

Anyway, today is a new day. And it's going to be a good day, even if it kills me. Wink

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

We won't throw anything big for Clara, just family and cake and a few gifts. I'm not really into doing themed parties unless they specifically request it, at 2 years old I know she'll go bananas for helium balloons and my older boys just like to have friends for a sleepover. We tend to have big parties for their first birthday.

Ladybugsteph's picture
Joined: 06/21/06
Posts: 2975

Okay, I haven't read anyone's responses yet to your post Kilah, but I wanted to take a moment to respond before reading (and me forgetting everything I wanted to say lol)

I guarantee that EVERY mother has felt the way that you do right now. Having more than one kid is TOUGH! So much more difficult that I ever expected. I thought that things would just double, but it's more like they quadrupled! How is that even possible? We only added one more person to the house. I'll be honest and say that part of the reason that I haven't been posting as often, is because I'm just too overwhelmed most of the time. First of all, I feel bad bringing anyone down (which I know shouldn't be, and you are all here for support), and second of all, just reading about more babies stresses me out. So I usually browse the photography stuff when I'm online during nap time. That way my mind is off of kids and babies (somewhat), and I'm thinking about something else.

The thing that keeps me going most days, is the fact that I know that eventually, my kids will be doing things for themselves, and that it won't be like this forever. I've definitely had days where I've had both kids literally screaming at me at the same time. Most of the time they trade off. Seems like I've always got someone crying. There have been plenty of times where I've sent each of the kids to their rooms so I can take a breather. I've lost my cool more times that I can count. I yell. I'll admit it. I hate it, but I yell. I feel like I need to get a better handle on my stress. What helps, is to get away once a week. Drew's been pretty good about keeping up with his promise to let me get away one night a week. It's taken a lot for me to give up that control (I'm a control freak, and it's a problem), but it really helps me to unwind, and be a better mommy.

The hardest part for me? Having Drew not understand at.all. He doesn't get it. He thinks that I don't like being a stay at home mom. He thinks that I hate it, and that I need to get out and get a job. He couldn't be more wrong. No matter how many times I tell him that in order for me to appreciate my kids more, I need to get out for a couple of hours a week, he just doesn't understand. He does it, but he doesn't understand it. Maybe he does now, after being home with the kids for 10 days with sick kids, but something is telling me that if he does, he'll forget it. I'm just like you. I would love to be able to have someone to call, who "gets it". Someone who I can be completely honest with, and who understands exactly what I'm going through, and why I've handled situations the way I've handled them. I just haven't found that person yet.

You're not alone though, Kilah. Even though they won't admit it, every mother has been though exactly what you're going through in one way or another. No one has the perfect life. Everyone has their challenges in one way or another.

(((HUGS)))

irishgirl's picture
Joined: 04/10/07
Posts: 1043

Kilah, I think H is a lot like Fiona. It gets better. I hate to tell you not until about now, but she's finally listening and responding. Nothing works with her either, which makes you just want to do ANYTHING to make her listen. I think they call them "spirited" children. Wink I think when she's old enough from pre-school she would benefit a ton from it. I don't know if that helped Fi or it's just the age or what, but it's gotten so much better. I didn't even want to kill her over break. I wanted some time with her in school so I could get more done, but I never thought I couldn't handle her, which I used to all the time.
I'll admit I've felt like a huge failure because I feel like I can't make her mind, and she has some problems with impulsive behavior. I know the impulsive behavior is more than likely ADHD and i realized after being around some other kids that she's normal in her behavior. Lots of kids kick and scream and bite their parents. Wink Doesn't make you a bad one because that's what happens.

So I went to target and publix today while Fi was at school. Even though I really want to clean. But I HAD to get diapers and a few other things. Oh well. Hopefully I can clean the bedrooms next week, or magically will be able to this afternoon.

i can't remmber what else I was going to say because it didn't do "quick reply' so I can't look back at the posts..bah

Oh, Whitney, I think that's amazing you can do the job you do. I would never be able to do anything like that (also couldnt' be a nurse or teacher...just not my personality). I'm sure you couldn't have done anything else, but I see how you could think that.

kilahmaree's picture
Joined: 08/28/09
Posts: 951

Thanks, Steph! I totally understand needing to get away. I used to go to the movies once every single week by myself before I had Halloway. It was just so I could zone out and forget the rest of the world. I think I need to start doing that again. But like you, I'm a control freak. I just don't know if I can leave them (even with Jaime) and just go do something for me. I won't know what's going on at home, not to mention I'd probably end up feeling guilty. Blah. But I hope things get easier for you, too!

And yes, Ann-marie, I am all ready looking into pre-school for her for next year. It's funny, because when she was born I swore I'd never even put my kids in preschool. The whole "I'm home with them, there is nothing they can't learn from me that they can learn at school, yadda yadda yadda." Now I'm just excited that the co-op that's 3 blocks from my house takes 2.5 year old...yeah, her pediatrician even calls her "high needs" ha ha. I mean, I love that she's so in control and knows exactly what she wants when she wants it - it will be great when she's an adult - but it really just sucks when she's not even 2 and I look like the awful parent that has no control over her kid sometimes. Oh, well.

Halloway has a fever today. Sad No other symptoms, so of course I'm freaking terrified of her having another UTI. If she gets another UTI before she's 5 yrs old, I pretty much *have* to let them cath her and check out her kidney's, which I really don't want her to have to go through. Agh. I mean, I can say no, obviously, but the likelihood there is sometime wrong is greater if she keeps getting them at this young of an age...blah. But she did take an hour long nap this morning, which was really strange, but admittedly nice.

Joined: 05/04/09
Posts: 1316

I hope H doesn't have a UTI. And I totally dont' think you should feel guilty AT ALL about getting away by yourself every so often. I think it could only be beneficial to you and the kids. That's really cool about the co-op preschool.

irishgirl's picture
Joined: 04/10/07
Posts: 1043

Yeah, I always said "What's the point of sending them to pre-school if I'm staying home, I'll just teach them preschool" yeah, that worked out well. hahaha.
I was worried Rowynn might have had a UTI too, but I think she's done with the fevers. Mine have never had a UTI, so I have no idea what to look for. but she didn't run a fever at all yesterday, so maye it was just a virus? The NP told me I could wait until Friday to bring her in to check for UTI. I told them she'd had a fever about 5 days, on and off, around 101/102, came down immediately and stayed away for a while with motrin and she was mostly playing fine as long as it wasn't when her fever was high. When her fever was high I had to hold her, but she was otherwise fine.
So they said I could wait another 3 days and if it continued to bring her in. But she seems fine now, so that's good. They said a lot of viruses were going around that sounded like that though and they understood my want to wait it out. Wink

i hope H feels better.

ETA: I also feel guilty when i leave them for more than like an hour. I also can't resonably do anything if I'm in the same house as them. Michael will take them to the playground sometimes, and I get to clean. I've found the best thing to do is to just sit in the living room in the quiet after everyone has gone to bed. That seems to have made me SO MUCH better. Also it helps that the girls go to sleep on their own now after we've read them a story. That is a million times helpful.

Ladybugsteph's picture
Joined: 06/21/06
Posts: 2975

Yes, it took me quite a few trips out by myself before I was able to fully let go, and let Drew be in control of bed time. I've finally worked myself up to letting him put them to bed when he doesn't necessarily HAVE to (like when I just go out to dinner with my friends). But, finally, I feel ok with leaving them with Drew and letting him do the whole bedtime routine by himself. Last time I went out, I didn't get back until about 9pm. I felt so good afterwards.

I don't know why I'm such a control freak. I mean, I should be super happy that I don't have to do anything when I'm not around. But for some reason, it has to be done the "right" way. I just need to let go, and accept that it's better for myself if I get out, and things aren't done exactly the way I do it.

kilahmaree's picture
Joined: 08/28/09
Posts: 951

So Halloway woke up covered in hives. Interesting. I called the pedi to see if I should be concerned, and they said it was likely a virus and the hives were her body's way of dealing with it. She seems completely unphased.

Yeah, hopefully once Lio is bigger I'll have the ability to leave if I want. Not that I really have anyone IRL that'd I'd go hang out with. I mean, honestly, all the "moms" I hang out with for playdates, even the ones I like, aren't moms that'd I'd want to spend time with without my kids. And all my friends have moved on and don't even live nearby anymore. Oh, well. I like just being with me, too! Smile

irishgirl's picture
Joined: 04/10/07
Posts: 1043

That sucks Kilah, at least you know it's (probably) a virus and not a uti. Wink
Yeah, I don't generally like being with people, so I like to just hang out by myself...or with Michael or my parents.

I'm really pleased with how productive I've been today. Something about getting up and getting everyone dressed always makes me productive. Of course i can't make us do that on a day we don't have school...good news is she'll have school every day next year so I'll have no choice. Wink

Ladybugsteph's picture
Joined: 06/21/06
Posts: 2975

Aww! Sorry she has hives Sad I swear that the entire country is sick right now. We just got Jackson some antibiotics yesterday for an ear infection. He REALLY scared me. Like really bad. He'd had a fever since Sunday after his nap. I was waiting it out, and was going to go in on Wednesday if it hadn't gone away. Well, it wasn't there when he woke up, so I didn't call. BUT, then as we were getting ready to head up to lunch, he started doing this thing where he was falling over. Like his legs weren't working, and giving out on him. So, of course, my mind immediately goes to meningitis. He stopped by the time I was off the phone with the doc. Just some fluid though. Nothing too bad, but still got the antibiotics. Guess he was just dizzy. But man, I was shaking I was so scared while it was happening. He literally couldn't walk. I hope to never see that again.

So I started watching How I Met Your Mother on Netflix, since I'm on this Jason Segel kick after watching The Muppets. Now I'm dreaming about him..... LOL! I think I could get used to that. Wink

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Seems a lot of people are missing lately, this board isn't the same Sad I wish more would keep up and post updates, Facebook has really changed forum communities I think. Vicki what are you up to? How are things with your DH?

I didn't go on the treadmill last night and can't tonight because my toe is driving me nuts, it is so sore. I keep putting the baby orajel on it to numb it up, I hope it heals up fast!!

Joined: 06/05/09
Posts: 313

Sorry H is sick Sad I hope the hives and fever go away! I have a really hard time leaving Ava with anyone. Even Dan. Which makes me feel guilty because he is great with her. I just have such a hard time relaxing away from her. I hope someday it's easier.

I'm happy that I'm not sick anymore and I tested and of course not pregnant. I'm not surprised. With the holidays and family around I haven't been in the mood to "try" this month.

Joined: 05/04/09
Posts: 1316

Glad you're feeling better Brittany!

Steph-that would have scared the absolute crap out of me!! He was probably just dizzy from the fluid in the ears? I'll have to remember that if it ever happens to me. But holy crap scary!! Glad he's ok!
I'm sort of obsessed with Jason Segal and Marshall is pretty much my ideal man I think. Although I don't really love that show, I do like it ok but I kind of find the premise to be out of place like they're trying to do too much. I'm not really into the Muppets but I think I might have to see this movie, I keep hearing good things about it!

I think our board is still decently active, some of the boards around ours are almost completely dead so I think we're doing pretty good. I think Vicki has been on vacation and I would expect her to pop in soon. I've been thinking about her too.

We are looking to get a new TV, I think we picked out the one we're getting tonight and we went to dinner so pretty good day. Tomorrow we're getting our carpets cleaned and I will try to begin the massive cleaning/rearranging project (ok it's not that massive). I also picked up a short visit tomorrow too so that's good.

TeraBKnits's picture
Joined: 08/10/09
Posts: 264

I know I haven't been around much, but I wanted to pop on and say hi and to respond to Kilah.

Kilah- I have days where I hate, hate, hate being a SAHM. Chloe never naps anymore unless she falls asleep in the car, and she always needs me when we are home so it's next to impossible to get anything done around here during the day. I am so tired at night from being busy with her all day that it's hard to spend any real time with Matt. Chloe doesn't sleep at night much either, so we are pretty much just exhausted all the time around here. There are times I just want to scream and run away from home. I also have issues with the constant TOUCHING! Ahhhhh! Chloe is always attached to me, and then Matt comes home and wants to snuggle and I sometimes want to just freak out on both of them. There are days where I don't even get to go to the bathroom alone, since Chloe is so fascinated with the bathroom right now. Sad If it's not her, it's the dogs barging in on me! I've cried many times over not being able to even pee alone! Or eat dinner without sharing or having to cut up someones food or have someone sitting in my lap!

I don't really share the momma guilt over going out. I'm cool with leaving Chloe for a few hours so I can go shop or go out to eat with friends. I always feel so much better afterwards and ready to face the next day. I do tend to check my phone and text home way more than I need to though! I really think you should try getting out on your own to just have some peace and quiet. Even just a walk around the block or to run a few errands. Maybe start small and work up to a longer period of time? I'm always here if you need to talk too. Just pm me or I'm always on FB too (phone, computer and nook are all connected).

So, we booked our trip to Disney World for this coming July!!!! I am beyond excited right now! I'll be turning 30 at Tuto Italia in Epcot (our fav Disney restaurant!). Smile I've started to OCD planning and list making. I'm hoping we can do at least a few character breakfasts too. We'll be there 9 days, so hopefully that's enough time to do/see everything we want.

Is anyone else's kid obsessed with cataloging everything?? Chloe walks around and tells me "momma's cup. grandma's chair. daddy's glasses. etc) She likes to sort things by who they belong to or by type/color all day long! She also gets super upset if we use the 'wrong chairs' at the dining table. She's deemed two chairs to belong to Uncle David and Aunt Shannon and now when we use them she tells us "You are wrong! That's Uncle David's chair, silly!" and then keeps saying "Move!" until we tell her to knock it off or we just move. WTH? At first it was super cute. Now it's getting irritating! Lol.

We go in for testing next week to see if Chloe can get into a gifted program hosted by the college here. It's different than the one she was in before. I hope it's as good, and I hope she doesn't bomb the test! We had to do a bunch of videos of her doing different stuff already. I just want her to have something to do that doesn't bore her (seems to be a major issue lately) and somewhere that she can play with kids around her age who can talk and interact with her. If she's accepted, it would mean free tuition too which would be amazingly awesome. It's hard for me to talk about it with people IRL because I don't want to sound braggy or obnoxious. I mean, just because Chloe is ahead right now doesn't mean she won't even out later on or even fall behind. I am super proud of her accomplishments right now and where she's at, and I can't help but talk about it. Arg.

kilahmaree's picture
Joined: 08/28/09
Posts: 951

Steph - that would have been so scary! I'm glad he's okay!

Tera - that is awesome about the gifted program! I have no doubt she'll ace it. H is pretty advanced compared to her friends around here, and she is no where as advanced as Chloe! And yay for Disney World! That is so exciting! I was actually thinking of Disney for my 30th, then realized Lio would be 6.5. :eek: I don't want to wait that long, bahaha! I am sure you will have so much fun! And 9 day is a long time, I'm sure you'll get everything in! Are you going to Universal's too? I really want to go to the Harry Potter part, since it wasn't ready the last time Jaime and I went.

So Halloway woke up with hives again this morning. Beee Not sure. They were gone by the time we were outta the shower, and she has zero fever now. I am going to wash all her bedding today, even though I just washed it like four days ago. She also is so proud that she can take her zippered and snapped pajamas off now. She'll never wear clothes to bed anymore...When I woke up she was completely naked. At least she didn't pee the bed.

Joined: 05/04/09
Posts: 1316

Yeah I'm sure Chloe will get in.

That's so weird about the hives!

WTF is up with the new season of Project Runway Allstars!? totally different judges and no Tim Gunn? WTH is the point. I am so beyond disappointed with this crap. I mean I'll still watch it b/c I love Mondo and he's on there but it was really sucky last night.

irishgirl's picture
Joined: 04/10/07
Posts: 1043

Brittany, I;'m glad you aren't sick any longer. 2012 is your year though, I feel it. Smile

Whitney, new TV is awesome! So is getting your carpets clean. I'm jealous. Smile Though we have a new TV...so I'm jealous of you going out to eat and your carpets. We're starting to try to eat at home more often. I've challenged myself to eat out only 4 times all month. Doesn't include this weekend when we go to Tuscaloosa though. So far I've done it, so that's awesome.

I can leave the girls with no guilt, and I worry about Egan because with Rowynn she never took a bottle and I wasted a bunch of pumped milk because of it. I hate to pump, and it's super hard to do with 3 kids, so I worry he's hungry when I don't take him with me. But I think I've left him like..3 maybe 4 times total. Twice was when Fiona had something at school, and I know I left him this past Sunday to go to the grocery store. I may have left him one other time, all were for about an hour. But the girls I don't worry about anymore. Mostly because we hang out at my parents so much so they're really comfortable over there. Michael rarely has them alone, but when he does I know they're having fun and he can totally handle it. I have a little anxiety when Michael takes them somewhere because I (am crazy) and worry that they might all be in a car accident and that would be horrible. But I have serious car anxiety. I have the same thoughts when I'm int he car. I told my dad I am one more car accident away from needing xanex everytime I go somewhere more than the grocery store.

tera, that's exciting about Disney! We're going Sept 27 for 10 days and we're doing IOA and Universal too. We're going to be at the parks for 8 days and then the day we get there and the day we leave. We're doing Magic Kingdom 2 days, Epcot 2 days, AK 1 day and HS 1 day. Then one day for US and one day for IOA. The day we get there we're going to do a dinner show, and we MAY do something on the day we leave, not sure though. I'm sooooooo excited. I'm basically waiting for dates/times and halloween party dates to be listed, waiting on discount codes to be released for that time, and my 6 month ADR booking period.

Kilah, that's strange about the hives, but I"m glad she doesn't have a fever.
If it becomes a problem, try turning them around and zipping/buttoning them in the back. We had to do that with Fi because she'd get naked and pee all over and I couldn't do that. haha

irishgirl's picture
Joined: 04/10/07
Posts: 1043

I forgot I was going to post about PR. I turned it on briefly last night because Egan was mad, but then he went ot sleep so I went to bed because I was SUPER tired. But I wanted to make sure everyone that wanted to watch it is. Smile
they have some awesome people on there, I can't wait to watch the whole thing. I think I may be even more sad when some people leave this time since I'm already attached to them (kenley, mondo...I don't know who else off the top of my head)

Joined: 05/04/09
Posts: 1316

See I don't love a ton of people on there, although a lot of them are good. I think Rami is good, I like Kara, I could never get on board with Kenley. I like Sweet Pea, I think April is a bad ***, I like Anthony. I'm not a big Austin Scarlet fan although he is entertaining to watch. But my only love on there is Mondo. With different judges and not Tim it's REALLY not the same. Feels like a totally different show, like one of those knockoffs Sad

Ladybugsteph's picture
Joined: 06/21/06
Posts: 2975

Ann-marie, we may just be there at the same time as you! Drew said he's going to sock away 3 grand from his (huge) bonus this year, and we're going to take another trip to Disney World in probably September. I'd love to see it all decked out for Halloween Smile

Whitney, please say you've seen Freaks and Geeks. I absolutely LOVE that show. And yes, Marshall is probably the best guy ever Wink I love the show, but Drew doesn't. So I've been watching like 5 episodes during nap time lol. Totally dreamed about him again last night. I could seriously get used to that hahaha!

Glad you're feeling a little better, Brittany. Though, I read you have a really bad cold left over Sad Boo! I am so crossing my fingers for a baby for you this year! Oh, and did you know that we can text for free to eachother now? LOL I love the iPhone!

Sucks that H has hives again Sad I really hope it all gets sorted out soon. I HATE washing sheets!

Awesome about the gifted program, Tera! I hope she gets in!

Joined: 05/04/09
Posts: 1316

Steph, YES! I actually watched it when it was on TV b/c my mom was really into it, before anyone knew who any of those guys were. Seth Rogan actually did a lot of the writing for that show. I love Seth Rogan too. I so wish they would have made more of that show! I don't know why it got canceled.

Ladybugsteph's picture
Joined: 06/21/06
Posts: 2975

I actually didn't get into that show until college when one of my friends played it for me. Her family and her watched it, and she was really into it. I'm so glad that she introduced me to it. It's on, I think, the independent film station. I've thought about buying the series though. Drew really likes it too. The first time I showed it to him, he was like, "Isn't that that guy from..." I'm like, "Yep!" "And that other guy is from..." "Yep!!" "And THAT guy from..." "Uh huh!!" LOL He didn't even have to finish his sentences.

I do like Seth Rogan, but my soft spot is for Jason. Smile

Pages