anyone want join me in ....

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Chris_85's picture
Joined: 10/14/08
Posts: 675
anyone want join me in ....

the inlaw drama rant thread, since i know the holidays can be hard, i woudl love to say what i really think, and yet i still grin and bear it.

I am just so thrilled with my MIL, and now i have decided to always talk to the SIL first.
If i was writing this yesterday I would be telling you all how i am skipping out on inlaw drama, but no, my SIL had to insist we do a version of Christmas with them.

rewind last Wednesday night Dh was talking to MIL, i told him to tell her what days and times we would be available for xmas with them. Saturday 17th, Sunday18th afternoon or Friday afternoon or xmas eve afternoon. She pitched a fit i was trying to nurse Lilly to bed, then Dh just gives up and hangs up with her. I was mad, because it always has to be at SIL which is a 45 in drive for us, and when it is convenient for them. Why not have it here in town At MIL ??? 2 min drive for us.

Then i get a text from SIL asking when we can get together for xmas, which we all know is next Sunday. I text back Saturday afternoon, since we have a party at 6 and Lilly is in bed at 830. SIL calls, says sorry i didn't get back to you, we politely argue which days are better for us, and come up with this Friday afternoon, but it is an inconvenience for her, we both agree its not fair to make the kids wait until after xmas... I really could careless about actually spending time with them, but i do it for Dh whatever. so I get off with SIL she calls MIL, then SIL calls back argues that we should just come over xmas eve because it is there tradition to host and have family over their house, blah blah, well it is our tradition to go to our friends party every xmas eve, we had no family me and my mom, so we made our friends our family, we all drink and be merry, and talk about how the year has treated us exchange gifts havea great time, and everyone is welcome. so close i could walk home.

sorry this is long anyway then the truth comes out of SIL... My MIL tells SIL that she does not want to do it during the day because MIL wants to spend a couple of hours with Lilly and watch her and play with her. UM yeah you all know that i have a hard enough time getting Lilly to bed and i am lucky if she naps, so why would you want to keep a baby up and cranky.
By the way MIL has been told she can come and see Lilly when ever she wants just to call first. She has only been to visit 2 times since we came home. It really pissed me off because she lives 2 min away, and where is she every weekend at SIL baby sitting Lillys cousins must be nice to have a free baby sitter. not that I would ever leave my baby with a women who can't put a baby in a car seat.
I could go on, I only pretend , and get along with MIL because of Dh, if i had it my way i wouldn't even bother.

I am sorry this isn't so posed to be the nature of the season but i go through this every year, they had us on Christmas last year , and this is Lilly's first , plus my dad is going to get to be here, remember he is over the road truck driver. so he hardly ever gets to see Lilly.

thanks for reading my vent if you made any sense of it.
i know i am not the only one.

LauraMae78's picture
Joined: 01/10/11
Posts: 969

Holidays are tough, hang in there and for goodness sake, i really hope you arent going to cancel your Xmas eve plans! that sounds like SO much fun! We have the opposite problem. the only people who bother with us EVER is my parents and his dad. my SIL watches Kendra, but that is all the contact we have for the most part. my MIL and other SIl live 12 minutes away (yes 12 LOL) and have yet to pick up the phone asking to come see us or Kendra, but will complain b*tch and moan when we stop by for to pick up rent $$ from our tenants that live next door because we dont stay long enough. Im used to it by now, 11 years and MIL has NEVER made effort to see our oldest 2. it saddens me for the kids, but honestly, i am glad to not have all the drama around this time of year, especially THIS year. i am so overwhelmed and have so much anxiety lately that i am almost thankful to them for staying away. but in the end, i will always wish that our family loved the girls enough to bother with them Sad but then, i know DH and I love our girls enough to make up for it!

On the other hand, my parents came over yesterday and i found out the my mom is upset. we have a wedding to go to on new years eve and my mom is watching the girls. when i originally told her about the plans i told her that we were THINKING about getting a room and staying at the hotel, making it perfectly clear that i wasnt sure if i would be ready to be away from Kendra for that long. in the end, we decided to not stay over (too much $$ and i just cant do it yet). she claims that i promised her the baby over night and is upset about it. she's a mom, i figured she would understand. My goodness, we went christmas shopping on saturday and was gone for 5 hours and i missed her terribly. there is no way i can go an entire evening and overnight. i offered them to stay at our house but i dont think they liked that idea. :shrug:

i was not put on this planet to please everyone around me so i am done trying to. Wink

Merry christmas!

bumblybees's picture
Joined: 03/24/10
Posts: 559

yeah, In-law drama sucks plain and simple. my MIL kinda has an excuse but not really. sigh we're 3 hrs apart but she doesn't really like to come here. and her house is NOT a choice. My kids are allergic to dogs, mold, etc and their house is full of all of the above plus some other things that i don't want to gross you out by mentioning. and there is NO way in heck fire i'd take a new born. so that means we'd have to go to a hotel and have Christmas there, can you see taking 3 kids (2 very active boys) to a hotel for the day and night and staying sane? I do not think so. Sigh.....
We've invited them down for Christmas. my partents are going to be here and i think that MIL is embarrased to come so she probably won't just so she doesn't have to be in front of my parents, who by the way are great people and totally un judgemental. uggg..

Eve's crying or i'd go on.

hugs! and Merry long as you and your DH and Babes are together it will be perfect.