time for me to feel sorry for myself. I tried to make it go away, but the crap is piling up and has overflowed. Still going bat-crazy living with my MIL who is basically on bed rest as well since she had her hip replaced 1.5 wks ago. Just absolutely not the situation we anticipated when we suggested my staying here. I spend copious amounts of time in the bedroom just to be alone.
My dad had lung reduction surgery a month ago due to COPD (like the commerical). He was a 40 (?) year smoker who had emphasemia (sp) and his lungs were so damaged one collapsed earlier this year. He had a great surgeon who said this would get him back to his health of 10 yrs ago. It was supposed to be an easy thing with 2-3 wk hospital recovery. Well he spent at least 2 wks in ICU alone and has since moved to a rehab hosp. My mom just confessed last night that he has a trach in and has to learn to talk/eat with it before they can take it out. Until then he's stuck. And the stupid speech therapist never gets around to work with him. wtf?? So, pretty much he won't be ready/able to travel later this summer when the babies get here... which was the whole point of the surgery in the first place.
Tonight my dr. called and told me I failed the glucose test so bad I don't even have to take the 3 hour. I go straight to a dietician. And I'm anemic - which I pretty much knew since I was eating so much ice lately. This just makes me feel like a failure. A lot of it is probably due to not sticking up for myself and getting the food I need/want in the house. For instance my MIL will buy a pre-made small container of fruit that I look at like "that is supposed to last the two of us multiple days??" When really I could eat it all in 5 minutes. She is so used to being on her own cooking for one (on WW no less) that she really doesn't get it. It makes me want my life back so bad. My grocery shopping, cooking, and eating habits.
My DH is supposed to be getting the house ready. My sister and her hub arrive this weekend, then go home with him to get the nursery ready (move all out and assemble nursery in) for the week. I thought the plan all along was for him to organize the basement so there is room to put all the stuff we need to take out (an ex. loveseat, my sewing table, etc). I know my DH is a procrastinator about stuff like that, so it shouldn't upset me that of course he hasn't started yet. But it does! All I want is to know that things are done. I'm getting freaked out that I'm almost 28 wks and it's not done yet. He has taken all the baby stuff back home from the shower and just our purchases - I have no clue what I have vs what I need. He knows he needs to do an inventory, but it's just not getting done. Part of it is my fault b/c I want it done NOW and have absolutely no control over getting it done.
Everything together is just too much. God give me strength! Thanks for reading, if you stuck with me. I totally understand if you didn't. =/