pity party

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3-o-me's picture
Last seen: 4 years 5 months ago
Joined: 12/28/10
Posts: 306
pity party

time for me to feel sorry for myself. I tried to make it go away, but the crap is piling up and has overflowed. Still going bat-crazy living with my MIL who is basically on bed rest as well since she had her hip replaced 1.5 wks ago. Just absolutely not the situation we anticipated when we suggested my staying here. I spend copious amounts of time in the bedroom just to be alone.

My dad had lung reduction surgery a month ago due to COPD (like the commerical). He was a 40 (?) year smoker who had emphasemia (sp) and his lungs were so damaged one collapsed earlier this year. He had a great surgeon who said this would get him back to his health of 10 yrs ago. It was supposed to be an easy thing with 2-3 wk hospital recovery. Well he spent at least 2 wks in ICU alone and has since moved to a rehab hosp. My mom just confessed last night that he has a trach in and has to learn to talk/eat with it before they can take it out. Until then he's stuck. And the stupid speech therapist never gets around to work with him. wtf?? So, pretty much he won't be ready/able to travel later this summer when the babies get here... which was the whole point of the surgery in the first place.

Tonight my dr. called and told me I failed the glucose test so bad I don't even have to take the 3 hour. I go straight to a dietician. And I'm anemic - which I pretty much knew since I was eating so much ice lately. This just makes me feel like a failure. A lot of it is probably due to not sticking up for myself and getting the food I need/want in the house. For instance my MIL will buy a pre-made small container of fruit that I look at like "that is supposed to last the two of us multiple days??" When really I could eat it all in 5 minutes. She is so used to being on her own cooking for one (on WW no less) that she really doesn't get it. It makes me want my life back so bad. My grocery shopping, cooking, and eating habits.

My DH is supposed to be getting the house ready. My sister and her hub arrive this weekend, then go home with him to get the nursery ready (move all out and assemble nursery in) for the week. I thought the plan all along was for him to organize the basement so there is room to put all the stuff we need to take out (an ex. loveseat, my sewing table, etc). I know my DH is a procrastinator about stuff like that, so it shouldn't upset me that of course he hasn't started yet. But it does! All I want is to know that things are done. I'm getting freaked out that I'm almost 28 wks and it's not done yet. He has taken all the baby stuff back home from the shower and just our purchases - I have no clue what I have vs what I need. He knows he needs to do an inventory, but it's just not getting done. Part of it is my fault b/c I want it done NOW and have absolutely no control over getting it done.

Everything together is just too much. God give me strength! Thanks for reading, if you stuck with me. I totally understand if you didn't. =/

Chris_85's picture
Last seen: 2 years 7 months ago
Joined: 10/14/08
Posts: 675

oh honey, I am so sorry you are going through all that, and then some. I think we all need to remind each other to take it one day at a time and do our best to take care of ourselves and relax.

I will vent a little with you, I had to take my dog to the vet today, and found out she could have died had we not had her tummy tacked since large breed dogs are prone to Bloat, and tacking the tummy when young prevents this deadly stomach twisting. She had some sever gas, and was given a doggy form of gas x. Anyway she is also suffering from stress/ anxiety, a normally happy healthy dog. the theory is that she is upset by all the changes in our house (painting, new floors, furniture arrangement) plus the severe weather, and my stress about everything.

So now I feel guilty for my own anxiety which is rubbing off on my poor sweet Saint Bernard.
I wish i could take it all away and go on a mini vacation.

isuche02's picture
Last seen: 4 years 1 month ago
Joined: 10/08/08
Posts: 1122


You are in a very difficult situation. You have every right in the world to vent. I can't imagine how frustrating it is for you.


I have GD too and just met with my dietian on Monday. I have been checking my blood and following my diet. How many total carbs did the give you for each meal/snack? I am just curious if they gave you more or told you to eat more because you are having triplets.

Mine diet/suggested eatting is:

breakfast 30g
snack 30g
lunch 60 - 75g
snack 30g
dinner 60 - 75g
snack 30g

and I have to do the blood sugar test 4 times a day - fasting, 1 hr after breakfast, 1 hr after lunch, 1 hr after dinner. They want me under 140 every time and prefer under 120.

AK2663's picture
Last seen: 4 years 6 months ago
Joined: 09/03/08
Posts: 710

Hugs! You have got a TON going on right now and you should vent when you need to Smile

I hope things improve soon!

rubyslippersbaby's picture
Last seen: 5 years 2 months ago
Joined: 12/29/10
Posts: 324

I am so sorry you have to deal with all that! I will send prayers of strength and grace your way! I hope it all gets better soon!!

gdsgft007's picture
Last seen: 4 years 3 months ago
Joined: 08/29/09
Posts: 418

:bigarmhug: My heart goes out to you. I am so sorry that you are dealing with all of that. I hope that things begin to get better for you soon and that your dad makes a speedy recovery.

squirrel27's picture
Last seen: 4 years 4 months ago
Joined: 05/13/08
Posts: 781


I totally understand (I think most of us do!). I feel lots of stress about not being ready (especially since we are moving) so theres nothing I can do right now to "get ready" since I'm stuck packing things up! It sucks, so I imagine not living at home would be worse! I'm sorry you get to deal with all the other issues too. As others have said, take it one step at a time, deal with a small realistic amount each day, and keep taking time for yourself.

Feel free to rant anytime!