Super frustrated....

12 posts / 0 new
Last post
gdsgft007's picture
Joined: 08/29/09
Posts: 418
Super frustrated....

Okay so today I had an appt to see a breastfeeding counselor. When I arrive there a lady almost hits my car with her Rangerover trying to back into a space. After I park and get out of my car, the same lady yells at me to tell me that the WIC office is closed. I yell back that I am there for another reason. She says okay and drives away. I go over to the door that I was instructed to go to and knock.... no one is answering the door and I am standing outside with Poetrie in the heat. So I call and every number I called is going to voicemail. So I decided to go back to my car. While I am standing there contemplating on who to call next, the same lady that almost hits me comes back. I ask her about getting into the bldg because I have an appt. She had the nerve to get an attitude with me and say that's what I asked you before. I said to her no you did not you asked if I was here for WIC and I told you NO I am here for something else and you said OK and drove away. So anyway she works for the place I'm trying to get to and leads me thru another office to get to where I am supposed to be. So I get to the waiting area and there's another mother waiting to be seen. Her appt was at 9 and it's now 9:30. When the counselor comes out with another couple and summons the other mother to follow her, she looks at me and tells me in a rude tone that I will have to wait until 10(I'm fine with that because that's when my appt is. So what I got there early)and not to give Poetrie a bottle that I'd just taken out and if I do not too much of it. Okay fine.
While waiting I strike up a conversation with the other family, the mother is complaining of having breastmilk all over her and that she thought at one point the counselor was going to break her 1 month old in half with the way she was handling her. I thought nothing of it at the time. Well to skip over the rest. When it's my turn I get in the office and I'm told to nurse Poetrie. I sit in the chair and boy the nightmare begins. I try to explain to her that she doesn't always want the breast. This lady is determined to get her to nurse. She is yanking and jerking her as well as my breast all over the place. I firmly hold on to my child. She tells me to massage my breast. When I do. She tells me that I'm not doing it right and starts to do it for me. To make this story short. It was a nightmare. Poetrie was crying and ended up with formula and breastmilk all over her face. She did manage to latch on and feed for a while. But now when I try to get her to nurse she screams. Even if I put her in the position to nurse she screams. Now I don't know what to do. I'm afraid that she may never want to nurse again after the experience she had today.

Joined: 12/21/10
Posts: 529

I am so sorry for your experience. I felt that way after the first lactation consultant that I saw.

My only advise is to try to get her on the breast every time you feed before you give the bottle. I was told by one l/c (I have seen 4 now and I like the 4th) to put milk on my nipple first and that may help.

What is the problem that you are having with the breastfeeding? I only ask as Lily and I have encountered so many problems and I would be happy to share any advise that I have received...if you are interested. BTW, we are now doing super with only her issue of being tongue tied left to deal with.

Jessica.'s picture
Joined: 02/02/09
Posts: 424

OH KIM!!!, I would have been in tears after that apt! IM so sorry it was so horrible! I'm sure she'll nurse again though, try just snuggling there with her after she's fed maybe and then gradually reintroduce the boob? Was that part of the La Leche league? I have always heard good things about them.

squirrel27's picture
Joined: 05/13/08
Posts: 781

:bighug:

Sorry it was so bad. Maybe try a new LC? Keep trying to BF!!!

rebgrace's picture
Joined: 03/28/08
Posts: 596

:lurk:
I am so, so sorry you had to go through that. I have had BFing issues with both of my girls, and there are some AWFUL LC's out there. There are good ones too, but the bad experiences tend to stick with you.
Whatever you do, don't try to push her to nurse. You want your boobs to be a happy place, and the more you try to force it, the worse things will get. Play with her skin-to-skin, put milk on your nipple and let her lick it off, etc. Try to nurse, and if she isn't into it, just try again the next time.
Good luck, I hope things work out for you. Is there anyone you can complain to? Getting help with nursing should not be that traumatic of an experience!!

LauraMae78's picture
Joined: 01/10/11
Posts: 969

Im sorry you had such a horrible appointment. I have a really hard time getting Kendra to latch as well! My LC tried several times to get her to latch and noticed that i was doing everything correctly too. I need a nipple shield to nurse, though i occasionally get lucky and can get her to latch with out it. Did she offer you a shield? i had to do the formula on the tip for about a week but we dont need it now. i am having other areas of dificult though Sad Good luck!!

VCoates's picture
Joined: 05/22/07
Posts: 1055

What a horrible experience!! I am so sorry you and Poetrie had to go through that. If there is someone to complain to, I'd definitely do that and possibly try a new LC for sure.

I agree, keep trying to get her to latch each time she needs to eat but don't force it. You don't want it to be traumatic for her. Have you tried different positions with her since the awful experience?

You are doing such a good job and keep trying. HUGS!

gdsgft007's picture
Joined: 08/29/09
Posts: 418

"jessica2575" wrote:

I am so sorry for your experience. I felt that way after the first lactation consultant that I saw.

My only advise is to try to get her on the breast every time you feed before you give the bottle. I was told by one l/c (I have seen 4 now and I like the 4th) to put milk on my nipple first and that may help.

What is the problem that you are having with the breastfeeding? I only ask as Lily and I have encountered so many problems and I would be happy to share any advise that I have received...if you are interested. BTW, we are now doing super with only her issue of being tongue tied left to deal with.

She doesn't want to nurse at times because she is so used to the bottle. But before this experience, I could get her to latch on and nurse for a few minutes.

"Jessica." wrote:

OH KIM!!!, I would have been in tears after that apt! IM so sorry it was so horrible! I'm sure she'll nurse again though, try just snuggling there with her after she's fed maybe and then gradually reintroduce the boob? Was that part of the La Leche league? I have always heard good things about them.

No it's a free service offered by the WIC program here. Since I was out of work for a while I signed up for it and told them that I would be breastfeeding as well.

"LauraMae78" wrote:

Im sorry you had such a horrible appointment. I have a really hard time getting Kendra to latch as well! My LC tried several times to get her to latch and noticed that i was doing everything correctly too. I need a nipple shield to nurse, though i occasionally get lucky and can get her to latch with out it. Did she offer you a shield? i had to do the formula on the tip for about a week but we dont need it now. i am having other areas of dificult though Sad Good luck!!

Nope no nipple shield. Wish they would have offered that when I had given birth and maybe I wouldn't be having this problem. I was afraid to nurse because she was so small but never revealed that to anyone. I was only offered to pump and feed via the bottle.

"VCoates" wrote:

What a horrible experience!! I am so sorry you and Poetrie had to go through that. If there is someone to complain to, I'd definitely do that and possibly try a new LC for sure.

I agree, keep trying to get her to latch each time she needs to eat but don't force it. You don't want it to be traumatic for her. Have you tried different positions with her since the awful experience?

You are doing such a good job and keep trying. HUGS!

Not yet. Everytime I lay her down next to my boob she starts to scream. I haven't asked yet if there was someone else I could talk to but I will before I have to go back. She also looked down on me when she found out that I was back at work fulltime. She said that they don't rent pumps for or to working mothers.

Joined: 03/06/09
Posts: 1054

I am so sorry! That's totally inappropriate. I can't offer any advice other than maybe you could try asking around if other mothers know of a good LC or doula. Most doulas are also LCs. You might have to pay for a consultation, but it's probably cheaper than buying formula Smile Like Laura said, maybe you could try using a shield. Also, if you're able to pump maybe just keep giving her expressed milk and pumping really often to get your supply built up.
You're doing such a good thing trying so hard for Poetrie. You've gone above and beyond to make this work. I really hope you can figure things out! :bigarmhug:

Joined: 12/21/10
Posts: 529

When we were in the hospital & I got sick & had to go home & Lily had to stay there & drink by bottle exclusively for a week I bought premie nipples (Dr. Browns) to make the suck a lot harder. I was told that they prefer the bottle because it is easier to get food from there than the breast. You might try that and maybe it will help get her drinking from the breast.

gdsgft007's picture
Joined: 08/29/09
Posts: 418

Thanks so much for the support and advice. Now she's suffering from a slight case of the pinkeye in her left eye. I think it may have happened on friday with all of what was happening. Formula was going everywhere. So now we have to put drops in her eyes and in her nose for the dryness. Poor baby and horrible mommy:(

Joined: 12/21/10
Posts: 529

Not a horrible mommy. A wonderful mommy for taking care of baby!