thinking of another

17 posts / 0 new
Last post
grovey2's picture
Joined: 04/08/08
Posts: 938
thinking of another

so...anyone else thinking about another one? I'm having mad baby fever.... I think it's cuz we always thought we'd start up another cycle around O's 1st bday....but now that's it almost here, i'm not sure if my BODY is ready. I still have to get toned up and i want to paint our bedroom...... I'm not sure if we should just wait til Jan to cycle or do it in like Aug? I wanted the kids kinda close in age, but i don't know....i can't imagine loving another baby as much as i love O and i can't imagine sharing her with another one too....will that ever go away...i do want more children and i would love a sibling or two for her..... for you BTDT moms...advice? She's still not sleeping through the night...do i wait til she's like 2 and hopefully sleeping before we try again....i dunno...

Joined: 12/01/10
Posts: 120

Mine are all about 3.5 years apart and I love it! With both my second and third, the older one was starting preschool when the baby was born so I had just one at home at a time during the day.

They are old enough to understand what is happening when the new baby is born, they want to help, only one in diapers at a time, and have never had any jealousy issues! I know a lot of people want their kids closer in age than 3 years, so I think you just have to go with what feels right for you and your situation.

Since I work in post partum I see all kinds of people with different age differences between their kids. Definitely is a lot harder when they are really close in age, but I am sure it is a lot of fun later! I cannot imagine having kids less than 2 years apart, but that is just me. I just love having more individual time with each when they are babies and the older one(s) is understanding (and at school having fun with friends during the day) so makes for less jealousy!

And...you always have enough love in your heart for more! Hard to imagine you can love anyone as much as your first, but you can, and you do! Good luck with your decision!

Danifo's picture
Joined: 09/07/10
Posts: 1377

We like our age gap and although we want one more, we won't TTC until DD2 is 2.

However, friends who have smaller gaps have kids that seem to adjust easier because they don't remember a time before the baby.

Any age gap seems to work so if you think you are ready, go for it Smile

Also wanted to add that there is always enough love for more kids. DD2 doesn't get as much attention from me as DD1 did but she gets more from DH and DD1.

Nell4Him's picture
Joined: 10/25/06
Posts: 2455

Okay, so I don't really know Julie or Holly yet. :wavehello: I see that they morphed our boards together. I look forward to getting to know the "new to me" moms.

On topic here. We are officially done. We knew we were done when I was pregnant with Evie (8 months on the 29th), but we just made it official with a vasectomy 3 weeks ago. I am pleased as punch to be on to the "raising" our family phase. My kids are 8 (coming Saturday), 3 (as of January), and Evie.

Our original plan was to TTC #2 when #1 was out of diapers. We only wanted one in diapers at a time. That being said, I was ready when he was 4 months old. DH was ready when he was 1.5, we started JLIH (just letting it happen) when he was 1 year and 9 months. We found out a couple of weeks before he turned 2 that we were expecting again. We were thrilled, though understood it was slim chance on the diaper deal. We announced at his 2 year party, and then we started miscarrying the day after. #2 didn't happen (not for lack of trying) for another 2 years. All in all, we got the wish on the one in diapers at a time. Until Little Evie came.

I think it's a good plan, and if the child is "average" you'll likely have a 3 or 4 year old and a newborn. There's always fears about adjustment for the older sibling. Maybe the "they're too young to understand" like I had with my #2, or the "he's been an only child for almost 5 years" like I had with #1. Either way, you're gonna have some potential issues to cope with. But one things for certain.. there's always room for one more in your heart!

Nell4Him's picture
Joined: 10/25/06
Posts: 2455

Oh yeah.. and like our first age gap... things don't always go as planned.

ETA:

I just realized I'm a dork and you KNOW about what I just said here. If I were to have actually READ what you said. I hope I didn't offend you by this comment. :doh:

Joined: 07/18/07
Posts: 414

Hi! I am from the June board Smile We are done here, unless an oops happens. My insurance does not cover any type of birth control. I would love DH to get the big V, but it's too expensive and he is on my insurance. I work for a catholic school. I am really hoping for no Oops!! Smile I am on BCP.

Joined: 08/20/11
Posts: 137

My son was born 5/21/11 and ever since we have been not trying / not preventing. And as you can see by my signature I am 14 weeks pregnant. I couldn't be more excited because I can't wait to give my son a sibling. I feel that I will always hold a special place in my heart for my son (my first born) but at the same time he will have a best friend (although I'm sure it will be a love/hate relationship as they grow up lol.) I say do whatever you feel you want to do. Everyone on here has different situations and is going to tell you different things. Me, personally would say: go for it!! Smile

kilahmaree's picture
Joined: 08/28/09
Posts: 951

Hey, I am an August momma. DS was born on the 28th.

You will definitely love another babe as much as you do O. Smile I thought it could never be possible, and then I had Lio and realized that it is more than possible. Your love just expands tenfold.

Mine are only 17 mos apart. I LOVE the age gap. Especially now that Lio is mobile, they play together so much. And just from my friends, it seems to have been an easier adjustment for my DD (who really never had to adjust to the baby, she loved him from the get-go) compared to those whose LO's were 2+. (I realize that many people have great transitions with older children, this is just from what my real life friends have experienced).

I knew rationally/logically we were done after 2, so DH got the big V when Lio was 5 days old. But if he hadn't, yeah, I'd totally be working on getting preggo. I just love me some babies! And in my fantasy world I'd have half a dozen. Wink

Jessica.'s picture
Joined: 02/02/09
Posts: 424

MEEEEEEEEEE! I want another!... just bought an OV kit! Excitement... Ben was born end of July... I would love a girl this time around, but If its another boy... my boys will have lots of male support through the years! Smile

grovey2's picture
Joined: 04/08/08
Posts: 938

phew, so i'm not crazy to want another one already huh? Smile I think the thing is, is that we have to do treatments again, so.....sometimes it's times like this when i wish that we could just get pregnant, cuz then we'd jsut LITH.... and when it happens, it happens....there's just something non cool about having to figure out treatments and cycling cuz it's time consuming and i have to figure out taking off work and what would work best and getting O to the babysitter, etc....and then one tends to over think..lol.
I'm going to set up a meeting with the fertility Dr and talk with him and i guess go from there! Thanks ladies!!

rebgrace's picture
Joined: 03/28/08
Posts: 596

I'm a little late to the party... But I agree, if you want another one now, you may as well get started!
I didn't want a 2nd until Leah was sttn. So she started sleeping at 14 months, we started ttc when she was 18 months, and her and Sidney are exactly 2 years and 9 months apart. I love the spacing, Leah is really good with Sidney. I would have loved to have them even closer together, but Leah was a very high-maintenance baby and I just didn't feel ready to do it again until she was a bit older.
Also, you will be surprised at how much you can love another baby Smile My big issue was feeling like I was neglecting Leah a bit because I didn't have as much time for her. But her and dh became really close in that first couple of months, and I think that it is even better for our whole family.
I kinda want another, but dh says he is 99.9% sure he is DONE. Sad It is totally crazy for me to even be thinking about though, Sidney doesn't sleep more than 1-2 hours at a time. I don't have the energy to be pregnant again!

pico83's picture
Joined: 09/06/06
Posts: 3014

I wanted another before DS1 was a month old. Lol We started JLIH when he was 6m, but thankfully BFing spaced them out more (20m)! When DS2 was born I knew I wanted another, but was thinking of waiting a little longer. But, DH liked the spacing so we TTC when LO was 11m and got pregnant the 2nd cycle (on LO's 1st birthday :lol:). This time... I'm not done. Honestly, I'd like 6. DH thinks he wants to be done after 4. But, DS1 won't even be in kindergarten for another 18 months and having 3 at home almost all the time is exhausting. And I'm not quite ready to deal with severe m/s again just yet. We're thinking we might try in October. After 20m and 20 1/2m between kids a potential 28m gap sounds like such a break!

Oh, and DS1 was a terrible sleeper. He had issues as a baby which cleared up briefly around 12m then got bad again. He'd be up for 3+ hours straight a lot of nights and would only go back to sleep if I rocked him. Which, from 4-8 months pregnant was hellish. Then he, amazingly, slept well for a few months around when LO was born before doing a "last hurrah" of bad sleep for a few months around his birthday. I had to sit next to him for him to fall asleep and it could take hours. If he woke up I had to start all over again. It actually only got better when he completely gave up naps around his 3rd birthday when I was 4 months pregnant with #3. Since then he's sometimes been tough during the day, but at least by bedtime he's too tired to put up a fuss. Was it hard? Yes. If I could do it over would I change anything? Probably with my early parenting of DS1 (live and learn) but not with the spacing of the kids.

mommys's picture
Joined: 05/08/06
Posts: 6264

I'm so excited some of you are trying again, I can't wait to see some more positive results (since the first one was posted this morning!).

We are done. Vasectomy is scheduled for next month.

Having my girls almost 5 years apart is really easy. Andrea is so much more of a help than she could have been otherwise. That said, it is kind of like starting all over again and they are so far apart that it will be a while before they can really relate to one another.

mandi04's picture
Joined: 08/10/03
Posts: 2272

My girls are 20 months apart, as are my boys Smile my second daughter was 3 when I got pregnant with ds1 and 4 months shy of 4 when he was born. I love both spacings, I'm glad they all have a 'buddy' close in age and I'm glad that the girls are so much older now that they are helpful. I couldn't have planned it better , which is good cause I didn't plan it that way lol
I'd love another baby, I've been thinking about another baby since I left the hospital Blum 3 but dh had a vasectomy last May and unless it didn't work we are done (he still has not gone in for a check, not that I'm holding out hope...what are the chances)

akpufa's picture
Joined: 01/31/08
Posts: 3078

Our kiddos are 23 months apart, a spacing that has been great so far. If I'd gotten pg right when we started to TTC #2, they'd have been about 18 months apart. I think when it comes to close age spacings, there are ups and downs, but you figure out how to work with the spacing you end up with. I was SUPER nervous when I did actually get pregnant thinking about having a second baby and whether I could handle both, love him as much as my DD, etc. I actually think my love for DD has grown since having DS because I see her in this other role, and of course I'm just over the moon for my DS. Sometimes I wish I could have 10 kids just because I love loving them so much (does that make sense? lol).

On the flip side, I have a couple close friends doing the 3-4 year spacing thing. The one w/2 kids likes the spacing because she says she gets to spend time with just her youngest because the older one is in PS part of the day. The one that is just planning that spacing says the thought of being pregnant again and having a newborn right now is overwhelming. And that's great that it works for them that way, but my side of it is that I get to spend a lot of time with my kids individually right now because they are on opposing nap schedules (although I get almost NO time to myself LOL) and as far as it being overwhelming...well it is sometimes but it is no matter how many kids you have or their ages. Plus you have NINE WHOLE MONTHS to wrap your brain around juggling both and you'll be so surprised how much your DD changes in that time.

ANYWAY...sorry that ended up really long Smile I just think if you're ready, go for it. There's no "ideal" spacing.

WonderWomanExtrodinare's picture
Joined: 05/26/07
Posts: 1192

I have crazy baby fever but I am waiting b/c 1. i like them spaced out and 2. I'm really enjoying my lil man and want this time to be special with him.
Your siggy pic is SO cute! love her bows. :0)

belzy's picture
Joined: 11/01/10
Posts: 522

I have been feeling the same since Christmas! I loved being pregnant and loved the feedings and cuddles with Brayden that i dont get very often now that he is more active which is why i think i have babies on my mind! Logically i think its best for us to wait until Brayden is at least 2 so we can give him the extra attention that he wont get once we have a newborn in the house but its seems to be all that i can think about! My DH has made quite a few comments about adding to the family but i never push the topic because if he were to say he wanted to try for another i might not have the will power to say no, if it were to happen by surprise it would be very welcomed but i think it makes the most sense for us wait a little bit longer!