Getting nervous about trying for #3

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juliekb's picture
Joined: 03/07/07
Posts: 27
Getting nervous about trying for #3

After having two 34 weekers, I fear we could be pushing our luck trying for a third. But we are getting close to being ready to try again. I just don't know if I'm ready for 7 months of anxiety, and worrying everytime I move that my water will break, or that every bout of contractions will turn into real ones. They started at 24 weeks with my first and at 21 weeks with my second. If they start even earlier this time around, I could be on bed rest potentially for the entire 2nd and 3rd trimesters. I'm desperately going to try to not use meds on a regular basis too, other than 17P injections. I can't handle terb or procardia longterm again. As rescue meds if contractions are just not stopping, sure, but not every 4-6 hours for 2 months. I worry about my heart too much. With my first, he was born early because my contractions started up one day, after having them daily for months, but then they just didn't stop. But, and this is what worries me the most, with my second, I was so sure I knew what to watch for and that I knew how to stop the contractions, but instead, my water just broke one day with no warning, no contractions, nothing. That terrifies me, because there is nothing I can do to prevent that. I'm thinking that I should get myself a fetal-maternal specialist this time around, instead of a regular OB. Maybe I should even be seen before we conceive and have hormone levels checked and all that, I've never had that done before. I've never been given a reason for my pre-term labor, though maybe there is no way to know. Anyone else been there before and had a term pregnancy after two preemies? Any advice on what I should do to prepare myself, physically and mentally for doing this again? Needing some encouragement.

AlyssaEimers's picture
Joined: 08/22/06
Posts: 6560

First :bigarmhug:

Second, having a baby after a preemie can be a traumatic experience. I have 3 preemie little girls. 34w, 35w, and 32w. My first two girls were able to go home with me and my third daughter was in the NICU for 2 1/2 weeks. After my DD3 we decided to get my tubes tied. It was a very hard decision. There are several ladies on here though that have gotten pg after a preemie and have gone on to have healthy full term pgs. Some wondering where to send the eviction notice too.

Joined: 12/10/06
Posts: 14

Were you able to use the 17P injections with your second baby? My first was born at 32 weeks after going into preterm labor at a little over 31 weeks, so with my youngest son, they had me do the 17P injections and I really believe that is what kept him in longer. I had him at almost 36 weeks and he only had to stay in the NICU for 24 hours for observation and he was able to come home with me....such a huge difference than with my first son having to stay in the NICU 5 weeks! Good luck with your decision!

Joined: 12/11/02
Posts: 485

*hugs*

I know I am concerned when we try for #2 about having another preemie.

juliekb's picture
Joined: 03/07/07
Posts: 27

I did have the 17P injections with my second. He still came at 34 weeks. I still wonder if he might have come earlier had I not taken it. But, I really couldn't tell that it helped with contractions. I had them constantly for months. I was admitted 3 seperate times in L&D to get them to stop. But, the day he was born, I hadn't had any contractions at all, just my water broke suddenly while I was lying in bed.

Clarkton's picture
Joined: 01/07/08
Posts: 1972

Hi Julie :wavehello: Nice to "see" you...it's been awhile. Smile

I had my first DS at 33.5 weeks and my second DS just a few days shy of 37 weeks. DS2 had no NICU stay. Both of my labors started with membrane rupture and I don't know why. Just seems to be the way I start labor. I have lots of BH's beginning at like 15 to 20 weeks...I'm not sure really how to tell the difference between BH and real contractions. I guess could be the difference in whether or not they cause dialation/effacement of the cervix, IDK. But I do know the fear of the unknown with pregnancy. I wish I had some good advice on how not to worry or how to carry babe longer but I don't. I just wanted to say good luck and I hope you have a less complicated pregnancy with #3 when you decide to take the plunge. :bighug:

PS...doctor watched me closer with DS2 since we didn't know why my water broke early with DS1. They checked my cervix via u/s a few times throughout the pregnancy and there was never any early dialation with all the BH's. I didn't have a long cervix but it also didn't get progressively shorter either. I don't recall if they watched anything like this with you and your second. Did your early contractions seem to cause cervix changes?

juliekb's picture
Joined: 03/07/07
Posts: 27

I did have some cervical changes with both pregnancies, namely shortening and softening. I was dilated at about a finger tip width around 26-28 weeks with both, but it seemed to hold up until I went into real labor. Braxton hicks usually only last less than 45 seconds and are eratic. However, real contractions, which is what I had most of the time were 90-120 second in duration and came very consistently anywhere from every 15 minutes to every 5 minutes. They would usually just stop on their own or with an injection of terb or increased oral dose of terb or procardia. With my first I was on a terb pump for a couple weeks - will NEVER do that again, in fact I think they are no longer allowed by the FDA because of potential heart complications in the mother.

Joined: 04/14/07
Posts: 793

My water broke suddenly while lying in bed when I was pg with Tyler. You're right - its terrifying bc how do you prevent that?!

I was on the 17p shots with Lana, was seen by my regular OB and a maternal-fetal high risk specialist...and made it to just shy of 37 weeks. Seeing the high risk dr might not have done anything more than to put my mind at ease, but it was worth it. Knowing they were monitoring me closely, doing regular checks and u/s...I was able to relax just a little more knowing that they would likely be able to see if things started to go wrong.

I would definitely recommend talking to one beforehand just to get some feedback, and seeing the high risk dr during the pregnancy as well. Good luck!

batbird's picture
Joined: 08/29/06
Posts: 325

We have been considering a third. First was 34 weeks. Second with a lot of I intervention and close calls made it to 37 weeks. I had a high risk dr as a consult with the second. We are now living in AL and were able to have a consult with the UAB MFM group. There are new advancements since my last, 2.5 years ago. They felt sure we could hit 34 weeks again. I know that isn't full term, but after staring down 24 weeks with Liam, I'll take it!

AlyssaEimers's picture
Joined: 08/22/06
Posts: 6560

Good luck trying for #3!!

Curious what new advances have been made in the last couple of years. I can't believe it has been that long since Liam (And Caitlyn) were born!

devermee's picture
Joined: 07/24/06
Posts: 239

Eeekk! We (I) am thinking seriously about #3 as well!! DH has always said he'd be good with two and now having a boy & girl, thinks things couldn't get better. He's known forever though that I wanted more than two and now actually talks at times about when we a have another, etc. Maybe we'll start TTC in 6 months or so?? That's beside the point right now though....
DD was 26 weeks 5 days, without any explanation, but with careful watching & interventions, DS was just over 40 weeks. My midwife seems pretty confident that DD was just a fluke deal for coming early. But, it still scares me what might be in store for me with another pregnancy. I think the plan would still be to watch me closely, use the 17P injections, not sure if they would do the cervical lengths as frequently unless the pregnancy indicated reason to.
I visited with a MFM prior to conceiving DS, just to put my mind at ease and see if there was anything that I could do before hand to improve my chances of a term delivery. It was strictly a consultation visit; it feels like it was forever ago, but from my memory, it was mostly just to put my mind at ease. He told me the same things my MW had already told me and agreed that I didn't need to see him as my primary OB doc, only if a problem would arise.
If you think it would put your mind at ease, it can't hurt anything to at least consult with a MFM prior to conceiving?!

mandi04's picture
Joined: 08/10/03
Posts: 2272

I had my first at 34 weeks 5 days, my second at 35 weeks, third at 36 weeks 4 days and my fourth I believe I was 39 weeks or within days of it. I was scared after #2 so I really just tried to be as healthy as possible when I got pregnant with 3, I read some studies on DHA and fish oils preventing preterm labor so I did that, I tried to eat as much protein possible and I switched to a group of CNMs. I still had the bouts of contractions and was hospitalized with both boys before their births but I made it to a point where they were healthy take home babies Smile
I'll add that it horrified my mom but I kept exercising while I was pregnant with the boys, would you believe I had contractions all the time but rarely while exercising? I did quit once I was further along and the contractions seemed more threatening but it did wonders for how I felt through my pregnancies. Definitely something to talk to your Dr about though. My labors just started, no reason we know of, my first three were all roughly about the same size so it was suggested that maybe that was my body's breaking point but #4 was a full pound and a half bigger than my previous biggest baby so he broke that theory

juliekb's picture
Joined: 03/07/07
Posts: 27

Well, we have put plans on hold momentarily, as I got a surprise job offer in Nashville, TN, so we are moving there from Texas this summer. But, I think as soon as we get there, we will start trying. I am in the best shape I have ever been, much better than when both my boys were conceived. I've been running for the last two years, am at a perfect weight, have been eating a whole foods diet, and moderating animal products. I have been trying to get in much more protein, especially with the training, so I am hoping some of this helps. I hope to continue exercising during pregnancy as long as I can. I will find a fetal maternal group as soon as we get to Nashville and make a consultation. I just want to know what my options are, since I know things have changed since my last.

Mandi, you really give me hope. They have said that my uterus appears to have a size limit as well (both boys born at 34 weeks, at just over 4lbs). The fact that you were able to carry another further along, and larger, gives me hope that that assessment is wrong! I'd give anything to have a take-home baby!

AlyssaEimers's picture
Joined: 08/22/06
Posts: 6560

Yay for TN! I am a couple hours from Nashville. It is a great place to live. Food for thought. DD1 was 34 weeks and a take home baby.

batbird's picture
Joined: 08/29/06
Posts: 325

Julie, Vandy has a great NICU and MFM group, better than Chattanooga. The big thing that will affect you is the abortion laws in TN causes some weird issues with the ethics board and when they can attend a birth.
Bonita, sorry for the delayed response. The big one they told me about at UAB is an alternative to the circulage. I wouldn't qualify for the traditional methods because I contracted, and that would rip a stitch out and cause bleeding and possible death. They have a plastic thing like a rubber band they can put on that does the same thing, and where they can't do a circulage once the funneling starts, this thing can be done at anytime without risking breaking the water. There are also some experimental meds, and other research trials. It is a major research hospital, so there is always something.

hopinfor1again's picture
Joined: 06/27/10
Posts: 491

I know hubby is deployed right now but I have been thinking about possibly trying for another baby early next year. Isabella will turn 1 on dec 29 and I will be 34 this year, 35 yikes next year. I really don't want to wait a long time since it took over a year to get pregnant with her. But I'm worried as well about another NICU baby. We spend so much at the doctors with apts checking on her growth and development but I'm scared of waiting longer due to my age. Hubby already said he wasn't sure about being active with trying fertility drugs since it put so much stress on me but it really isn't going to happen without some help from medication. I have spoken to many ladies who have gone on to have more than one preterm baby. I was healthly but she wasn't growing in the womb. I guess if I manage to become pregnant again they will watch.

Kier's picture
Joined: 03/12/12
Posts: 1973

My step sister had pregnancies similar to yours. Her first was born at 35 weeks, and her 2nd at 32 weeks. She never had noticeable contractions, her water just broke. They found that she had an incompetent cervix. With her third, they did P shots, as well as a stitch in her cervix. She was able to make it to 37 weeks with her 3rd Smile Hoping and praying that the same goes for you Smile