May Chat Thread
It's getting kind of quiet here. How is everyone doing?
DH is back at work this week after a vacation week spent at home. Oliver has perked up nicely (I wonder how long he was brewing that ear infection?) and his croup seems completely gone. Whew. Looks like I'm (finally) set to O in the next few days. I'm feeling really on the fence about TTC. Maybe it's because the last few weeks have been crazy. Right now I feel like waiting a few years then seeing if we still want another.
Virginia - glad he's feeling better! There's never any harm in waiting a bit I hope it all works out!
Mary - amazing on your parents :)
Hi All! I had the stomach flu Saturday. I was so sick. Sunday Rory threw up twice but never really seemed worse for the wear and last night Evan threw up once and this morning again but he seems fine now and even ate something. WHY can't my kids get sick on my DAYS OFF? UGH. DH and I are playing musical kids he went in tthis morning and I'll go in this afternoon. BAH.
I have also officially accepted defeat in the battle of Rory and the crib. I started putting him to bed IN our bed and he's so much happier. In about 20 minutes I can get him to bed in our bed, I can then get up, go downstairs do wahtever we can make noise when we come to bed and he hardly stirs and he sleeps so much better. Not getting all worked up over the crib seems to make a huge difference. SO I give up. Clearly he needs to be with us so I'll stop making all of us miserable trying to get him to sleep in the crib. We may never have sex again though LOL
Virginia - Are you feeling okay? ;) I've never heard you say "IF" you want more kids!! I'm sure it's just the chaos talking. I have those days too, and then when they're perfect angels, I want more right now.. Hahaha. :)
Katie - Yeah, the BD thing is interesting with cosleeping, LOL. We pretty much have to wait until they're both asleep, then sneak off to the guest bed, haha.
AFM - So like 5 years ago, I went through some situational depression and I've always been high anxiety. It was pretty bad to the point that I was physically ill, so I did a 6-month course of an antidepressant that is also approved for anxiety. Well, ever since Sean's seizure last July, I've been very high-stress when it comes to the kids. Then add in current work stress and I've been a bit of a mess. Not nearly as terrible as it was 5 years ago, but I just remember taking the medication and feeling a world of difference. Like before it I always laid awake at night worrying about things, then suddenly, I didn't anymore. I didn't worry excessively, and it was WONDERFUL. So I decided maybe I should try it again since I do worry excessively. Well, I started it a week ago yesterday, and it's nothing like it was the first time. The first time, I really had NO side effects. This time, I am having every side effect imaginable. Like in the first few hours after taking it, I feel terrible... Like my heart is racing, I can't breathe, my muscles are tense and shaky. I've been having consistent neck/shoulder pain (I was reading that 3% of people have this side effect, haha.. of course I'm in the 3%). I feel like I'm in a fog, sometimes dizzy/disoriented, honestly don't feel safe to drive. And anyway, I wasn't wanting to be on it forever. After the 6-month treatment with it before, I was good for years... I didn't really plan for a long-term use, especially if we're planning to have more babies... i'm not taking it while pregnant. Sooooo... Yeah, a week in and I think I'm going to quit. I've been high-stress and had anxiety literally my whole life... I've gotten along fine (for the most part) without medication. I just hate it when I get to the point of worrying myself sick about things. But yeah, no thanks. I'll just cope with my stresses the best I can without meds, hahaha. My DH didn't really think I needed medication anyway, and if he can deal with my high-stress self, then I suppose I can too. ;)
Not to get all psycho babble but have you considered some therapy Mary? I have a few friends with anxiety/depression struggles and they have experienced a lot of benefit from good therapy as well as medications. One friend is very against medications (though if I'm being honest I think it would benefit her greatly to try as does her therapist but hey that's not my place) so she copes with just therapy but her therapist has definitely helped her a great deal. Another friend has had life long anxiety and is a long term medication user -- she really needs it to be normal, I liken hers to insulin it most definitely fixes what her body doesn't do on its own. BUT she spent so much time being anxious that therapy along with the meds have helped her learn to cope. It did take her a while to find the right medication one that didn't have negative effects and then she had to change it up when she had kids. I think have a couple close friends with anxiety I'm a bit sensitive to it.....I've seen how big an impact meds and therapy have made in my one friend's life. Granted she's way beyond anything y ou describe she stopped coming to school in 10th grade! But anyway that's my thing - I think therapy can do wonders for people when it's a good therapist and a good setting.....impartial voice can help :) That being said I have never gone to therapy LOL My family are a bunch of drunks but they are happy....LOL
Katie - sorry about losing the crib battle. That sucks. Maybe he'll be ready in a few months. I caved with Oliver. I said he'd move out at 6 months but he ended up with us until 10 months.
Mary - sorry the medication isn't working. I have to echo what Katie said: could therapy help? I have to admit, I was a psych major, but I'm pretty anti-therapy in general (I played with lab rats, not people's minds). A lot of it is a waste of time. But, stuff like cognitive behavioral therapy can be really useful. There's a lot of anxiety in my family. I've coached my sister through a few anxiety attacks and my brother slept on my parents' floor off and on until he was 12 or so (sorry if that scares you, Katie, it's true). Turns out he had some anxiety issues, too. I'm gotten off pretty lightly. When mine hits (rarely) I mostly lie half-awake at night worrying myself sick (literally). My current treatment is my leftover zofran. I also have some claustrophobia, I hate driving through tunnels, and other stuff of that sort. (Oh, and a random fear-conditioning to a children's book... but only if it's read in German.) I've never had therapy, but I work on it myself. I try to catch myself early in my anxiety and tell myself to stop, that it won't help at all. It's taken work, but now sometimes I can stop it. :shrug: I'd look into some self-help coping mechanisms and maybe some therapy.
AFM: eh. Not really feeling okay, actually. I'm getting a nasty cold again. The last few weeks have been crazy. Oliver wasn't sleeping then he was pretty sick. DH was off work but I was still feeling overworked and exhausted all the time. Now he's back at work (gone 7am to 7pm+ daily) and I feel like I had no break. It's tough! But, when they behave well for a bit... yeah, I want more.
what do you think of that OPK? I'm seriously tempted to go for it. I wonder how many babies we'd get if we did... not that I have any reason to expect such a correlation.
Did you go for it!? DOOOO ITTTT LOL I'm perfectly happy to encourage others :)
this may sound silly but I have this HUGE sense of relief that I've just accepted that Rory will sleep with us. Bed time has been a struggle for 5 months. For a while it seemed to be improving a little but then it would back slide, then he'd get worked up and would be restless all night even with us. Putting him to bed in our bed seems to have eliminated all the stress. He goes to sleep, soundly, happily, easily, he sleeps MUCH more peacefully all night. I have an hour or two in the evening to relax and he's not flailing around all night because he got all worked up in his crib. I'm going to go ahead and hope he's not in our bed until he's 15 LOL but for now it's been the best week of sleep we've all had since December!
I'm glad you're getting some sleep, Katie!
No, we haven't gone for it. It's up to DH whether we will or not.
Mary - Could you look at herbal and natural methods (like supplements, exercise and meditation) for the anxiety? I'm big into natural remedies, not a fan of conventional medicine.
Virginia - You are crazy girl! First you are saying you are worn out from taking care of sick kids then you are talking of TTC. LOL! You do take care of those boys well though.
Katie - Glad to hear you've come to terms with keeping Rory in bed with you, I'm sure he'll sleep on his own at some point. Do you have a guest room where you and your DH could be intimate?
I need a vacation from my vacation, it is lots of fun but we've been keeping very busy. I did end up getting food poisoning on Tuesday night thankfully it cleared up pretty quick. Today I am taking things pretty easy, and getting bags packed since I head home tomorrow morning. I miss DH and DD1 alot can't wait to see them.
That's generally how I end up feeling, too. Once upon a time vacations were relaxing, but since we've had kids they haven't been much of a break. I'm glad the food poisoning passed quickly!
Originally Posted by Muddee
AFM: we wimped out. I want a warm weather baby and DH wants a spring baby. I'm mostly over the nasty cold, and as soon as I stopped feeling like I had been hit by a bus the hormones kicked in. :lol: What I'd really like to do is get pregnant now and have the baby this time next year. But that's not really an option, huh?