Ha I feel bad complaining about my husband because he really is great, it's just that he was raised differently and he wants part of how he was raised to be how our kids are raised. Apparently I am "over nurturing" lol. I started feeling just a little better for a few days and then DS decided he needed to nurse every 2 hours at night so I'm exhausted all the time. And my girls have been acting up horribly. And all last week we were stuck at home because it was 110 out and DH needed the car because he had to take all his gear to work every day. We have a car and a motorcycle (so then I could have the car, HA!) This week he is in the field all week again. And of course DS is wanting to only be held and if I put him down he cries. I feel horrible but I need a break. I give him belly time and he just screams, but he's okay. He actually will turn in a complete circle.
I hate the fact that I cry a lot still, or hold in my crying because I feel like it makes me weak. When DH left for the field yesterday I cried. I wanna cry right now because I feel like a horrible mother for just letting DS be on his belly when he doesn't want to be! His 4 month appt is the 26th so I may ask the dr then about meds. On top of everything DD2 has been very challenging with everything.
Oh and I was so out of it I left the garage door open all night. I was lucky nothing was stolen and my house wasn't broken in to. We have A LOT of stuff in the garage (garage sale was unsuccessful, might try again next weekend) and people enjoy stealing military stuff and there was a lot of that in there (DH agreed to store his friends gear too ugh) Oh and we have weapons in the garage. Ha ha. I think it was more because out street light is out, so near our house (other than the porch light) is pitch black and creepy lol so I figure no one noticed (and my car blocked most of the view).
This past weekend I also donated 350+ oz of breast milk to a mommy in need and I got my freezer back but now every time I look in my freezer I want to cry because all the milk is gone. WTH is wrong with me. It was going to go to waste most likely so it was good to donate it before it had a chance to go bad, but it's just a sad thing. I wonder if a lot of this is because DH keeps telling me no more kids and I want one more.
Also, I read somewhere that BFing can cause PPD because of the hormones. Is that true? Because I swear I had always heard the opposite! (sigh) here's to hoping for a good rest of the week!
First off, big hugs.
That is awesome you donated so much breast milk. That is awesome.
I wonder if you daughter is acting out more because of your husband coming and going. My son really needs a stable routine, anything off and he goes nuts. I can't imagine having to deal with a spouse that is not always there and worrying about deployments. Military wives amaze me.
About the PPD, let the doctor know that you just can't handle things anymore, that things are getting to the point where you are afraid that something might happen if you do not get help. Some doctors really don't seem to understand depression and certainly not PPD - I have had some doctors tell me to get over it.
Don't worry about venting, you need somewhere to do it and here is a good place. I find that when I write things down it helps me get things into focus better.
Yeah the dr on base told me that they're not going to worry about it unless I want to hurt myself or my kids. She said it's probably because I went from 2 to 3 kids. But 4 months later I still that way. It gets worse when my husband is gone. I feel like he holds me together when he's here. I dunno.
He comes home tomorrow and I can't wait because I'm really feeling down these past two days. (sigh)
OMG! I WANT TO PUNCH YOUR DOCTOR IN THE FACE AND KICK YOUR DH IN THE *ahem* LEG! Okay now, moving past my violent outburst.
Your doctor is an idiot. You are basically begging for help and they won't help you. Is there any way possible that you can go to a doctor OFF BASE? Please please PLEASE. Even if you have to pay out of pocket. Call doctor, tell them your problem, offer to pay cash for your appt (if tricare won't cover it), ask for a discount, and then GO GO GO. It breaks my heart that you are feeling so horribly and the solution to your problems is so simple.
As far as your huband, he needs a kick in the leg (although not my first choice of areas to kick). The video game thing makes me mad for you. If you don't want them to borrow it say NO and that should be final. Screw what they think. And screw that A-hole that text your husband and manipulated you into getting the game anyway. WTH is wrong with people? I swear. I'm so mad for you right now.
Good for you for donating that breastmilk. I can understand you are sad and grieving over it and that is ok. Just keep telling yourself that you gave a precious baby a wonderful gift. Kudos to you.
Keep your head up..and please find a new doctor.
My cousin is an army wife. She and I were going to the same OB clinic (I'm not military). So I second trying to find a clinic off base.
All I had to do to get ppd meds from my OB was ask for them at my 6 week postpartum check up. I said, "I'd like to get some zoloft," and BAM the doctor sent the rx to my pharmacy from his laptop. Ok maybe we talked a little bit more than that lol, but he didn't stop me at all.
From the stories I hear... you can't get anything accomplished in military hospitals/clinics lol. I hope you find a care provider who actually CARES because meds can really make a difference. They do for me anyway.
I have an appt Thursday and the pediatrician who sees my son is actually going to tell the dr I need something. Ha. He said he was going right over to her after my son's appt to talk to her. I'm not sure how going off base works when I'm only suppose to go on base. But they're going to finally do something on Thursday.
I took my son for his 4 month appt and I did a little survey thing for my depression and since it hasn't improved at all my son's pedi is going to talk to her about it. I dunno if that's how it always is or what.
As for my husband, the "Reasoning" behind it is so then I can use that against the couple with the whole "Wow you borrow my game and don't invite us to play yet take it over to friends' houses to play with them and get drunk yada yada yada". His family raised him around them doing stuff like that. I told him I didn't want to do that lol. We did get the game back after like 2 weeks, but I don't think they ever played it. Waste. He didn't want to deal with "Oh so she controls what you do?" or "What does SHE have a problem with it?" and then them come to me about it and messing with me. It was kind of to protect me and kind of to see how crappy they are.
So I'm back to having no friends ha ha.
But the good thing is I'm suppose to go on something Thursday. My question is, what I can I take w/o it messing with my supply? I recently found out I am one of the small percentages that the mini pill lowers my supply (so I'm currently not on BC right now) and I don't want that to happen again. (I'm rebuilding my freezer stash, which since learning why it was low and fixing that is going pretty good, I've already got about 50+ oz :) )
I think I know why I was sad about the milk donation thing. It was the fact that after I gave it all away my son was starting to take a bottle and he kept nursing like every hour at night, so it was more that I saw my son could've used that milk. But now that I find out WHY I feel better, and he's been sleeping better again and I'm hoping that I can actually become a donor regularly IF I can keep my supply up.
I just with these crap feelings will end. Can BC also have an effect on moody and PPD? I know when I'm starting my period I become a monster and I'm miserable. Plus on top of that, I've been so screwed up on my cycles...(at my 6 week check up I started my period, and then it lasted 8 days, got off it for 3 days and it started again...it was like that til I started on the mini pill and about 5-6 weeks after starting that my period started getting like that again.) Although I know everything has risks.
hopefully on Thursday they'll give me something that works.
Glad that someone is doing something!!! It's about time! Yes, BC can cause depression.
Hugs and keep us posted!
I think my dr is an idiot lol. She told me there was nothing I could do to boost my milk supply. Um I'm pretty sure there are herbs and stuff and I know the dr can prescribe something but she said that has to be done by 2 weeks PP. Desmond's pediatrician wanted her to give me something or tell me what to take to increase my supply because they think he's too small. (If they go by BFing charts he's average, but they go by FF charts). Ugh.
Anyway, then I was given a list of people to talk to (counselors) and was told to call one of them to set up an appt but that I needed to find child care for my kids or try to get the latest appt possible so my husband can watch them after work. Except they don't understand that he never knows when he gets off work (most of the time won't be until after 6 PM now) and by that time offices are closed. And since I don't have anyone around here to ask (or trust!) to watch my kids, right now I'm SOL. When I tried explaining that to them they didn't listen and think it's easy just to have my husband ask to get off work if needed. He has a new command who believes Infantry men need to be out in the field whenever they're not deployed, so he's gone T-F (Monday's he goes in at 5 and comes home between 6 and 7). Funny how when you're sick Naval enjoys giving out meds (even unneeded ones) yet when you really want to get on something they ignore it.
(sigh) Then I get to try and figure out what BC I'm going to go on. I'm leaning towards Paraguard since it's non hormonal but of course that's the one they don't have any info on. Ha ha. They kept wanting me to take another oral and I said I wanted to think of other options, and I don't want the shot. So they said Nuva Ring, Implain (or whatever it's called, but I said no to that), Mirena, or Paraguard. Although that was another they tried to talk me out of because it can cause heavy periods. I hate the drs lol.
A substance that increases milk supply is called a galactagogue. Some of the most commonly used herbal galactagogues are fenugreek, blessed thistle, and alfalfa. There are also several prescription medications that can increase milk supply.
Originally Posted by KET_2010