D&C Wed., 9/12 Need Love...

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rhmckeon's picture
Joined: 07/27/07
Posts: 13
D&C Wed., 9/12 Need Love...

I’m falling apart. One minute I seem ok, the next I want to hide. I’m 11 weeks today, and we found out by u/s that due to subchorionic bleeds (3) everything was cut off to our baby and it died at 8 weeks. How did this happen? Apparently my body doesn’t want to let go, so I need a D&C. We found out Thursday and we have to wait until Wed. unless I start to bleed. One minute I want Wed to come and then next I wish it would never arrive. Today I was in Walmart…I swear… I saw every baby, every pg women. I wanted to run out screaming…my DH doesn’t know what to say…I have no idea what to say to him. It really stinks. Please keep us in your prayers and send any advice about TTC after a D&C. Thanks

Joined: 01/25/02
Posts: 2023

No advice about ttc after a d&c, cause I am not there just yet. Honestly, I was seriously dreading having a d&c, and wanted to wait it out. But that was mental torture for me, and thankfully my doc does not like women to go over 2wks from finding out. That kind of set a date for me, and I scheduled the d&c. It was not bad, and I am really glad now that we chose that route. I have had very light bleeding, and minimal cramping (I did take the painkillers on schedule for the first 24hrs, to stay ahead of the pain). My doc advised waiting 2 cycles before ttc, so that is our plan.

Hugs hon! I am so sorry that you lost your baby.

Joined: 06/01/06
Posts: 174


I am so very sorry that you lost your baby. What would you like to know about ttc after a d&c?
I found out my baby's heart stopped beating on June 21, 2006 and I had a d&c the next day. I was about 9-10 weeks along.
I got my period again at the end of July and we got pregnant right away. Our baby was born on May 2, 2007.
For me, starting to TTC again was part of my healing process. I threw myself into it, charting, opks, the whole 9 yards. It was something that I felt like I had control over and so for me that was very helpful. Let me know if you have other questions.

JGro's picture
Joined: 03/24/07
Posts: 88

TTC/Preg mentioned...

I am so sorry you have to go through this. Take good care of yourself and give yourself time to heal. As for the D&C, as sad as it was, it wasn't nearly as bad as I was anticipating. I am no expert on TTC after D&C, because my situation was a bit different, but it might give you some help. I delivered my daughter stillborn at 20 weeks and then had to have an emergency D&C immediately after. We were instructed to wait 3 cycles to TTC. I did a lot of research and we waited two full cycles and decided that we were ready to try again. We were blessed enough to get lucky on the first try. I am 20 weeks pregnant now with a healthy little girl. Of course, we all know that life offers no guarantees, but I am confident that my previous D&C did not hinder my ability to conceive and carry a child. Coincidentally, I have two other friends who have been through very similar situations. They both waited 2 months and concieved immediately. Making the decision to wait only 2 months was a very personal one and not for everyone. One thing I would advise is not to start trying until you are definitley ready ... it could easily happen more quickly than you think. I agree with the PP. For me TTC was theraputic, but I know others have need more time to grieve before trying again. The best think I can say is to do what's best for you and your DH in consultation with your doctor. Don't think you have to follow anyone elses advice or timetable.

Please know we are here for you.

newbie2all's picture
Joined: 02/02/07
Posts: 93

After my D & C at 13 weeks we only waited for one period to come then TTC'd straight away. We also got pregnant right away before I even had 2 cycles go by. My pregnancy ended in miscarriage at 7 weeks. This time I have decided to wait out my full 3 cycles (even though I miscarried naturally) as when I didn't last time they did feel my second loss was caused by the lining not being ready after the D & C.
That being said, there are many stories of women who miscarry, have a D &C and are pregnant again who have excellent pregnancies.
I have chosen to wait and every day til I can ttc is hell. But it's the right decision for me so I can have peace of mind that if I have a third loss it wasn't because my body wasn't ready.

I hope what you decide is right for you. Here's hoping to a BFP for you as soon as you are able to ttc again!

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I'm so sorry about your loss.
Most doctor's state you should wait a few cycles. One to make sure you have dates correct and the second reason is to heal. You know when you will be ready.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

(pregnancy and child mentioned)

I'm so sorry for your loss! I had to have a D&C at 16 weeks when they discovered my baby had died some time after 12 weeks. Physically, the procedure was really not so bad. I had little pain afterwards and was able to try and get back to normal pretty quickly. Emotionally, that was a different story, of course. They also told us to wait 3 cycles to TTC. However, I had an HSG (hysterosalpinogram?) after one cycle and the doctor said everything looked fine and gave me permission to start TTC. We were also incredibly lucky to conceive the first try. This was amazing considering it took us well over a year to conceive the first time. So, I think it is really true that there is an increased fertility after a D&C. Please be aware of that, whether you want to wait and take more time to heal emotionally or if you want to take advantage of it.

My second pregnancy went just fine, even though I conceived so soon after the D&C. I now have a beautiful little girl. However, I can tell you that I had a hard time dealing with the loss emotionally while I was pregnant again. I was ecstatic to have the new baby, but I don't really think I had completed the grieving process for my first one. I would do it the same if I had it all to do over again, but please take your emotional healing into consideration when you make your decision to TTC again.

Getting pregnant again does not magically take all the pain away or fix everything. In some ways, it just confuses everything with all the conflicting emotions.

Best of luck and hugs to you, whatever you decide!

rhmckeon's picture
Joined: 07/27/07
Posts: 13

Thank youall so musc! I sit here today, in pain emotionaly and physically, but your thoughts really make a difference. I'm so glad I found you all. I can't wait for Wed to get here so my healing can begin.
Sad but...hopefull