Today is the anniversary of the worst day in my life. I went for my routine u/s in 2002, blissfully unaware that our Alex had passed away (on Dec. 11th). I still 'felt pregnant', etc -- but I didn't know that I'd had a "missed m/c" 6 days before. There had been no signs that anything was wrong.
I'll never forget when my "world" came violently crashing down on me in the ob/gyn's office. Alex was our first angel-baby, so I had no expectation that anything coud have gone wrong. I entered that office, happy and totally in love with my little baby. I came out absolutely shattered: devastated, heart broken and suddenly thrown into agonising grief, with the doctor's words echoing in my mind: "I can't seem to find the baby's heartbeat".
And I was also in full "wishful thinking" denial, partially fueled by the doctor's suggestion that I come back in a week's time, if there was no change to my condition. You see, when I said "Are you sure?", he said "We can do another u/s in a week, to see how it's all going."
Needless to say, I don't see that ob/gyn anymore.
Anyway, thanks for reading. Your hugs would be very much appreciated today.