Feeling Sad

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Joined: 11/30/07
Posts: 117
Feeling Sad

Im feeling really sad today. My friend has just given birth to her baby today, and my best friend is due to go in and be induced on the day of my d & c.

My DH has loads of work problems at the moment (he works in IT and he is having server problems) so is working all day and most evenings. He is under alot of stress so is a bit snappy.

My mum was supposed to be picking my 2 children up form school on Friday and keeping them till I got home from hospital after D & C, but she forgot she had promised to have my sisters daughter whilst her and her boyfriend go away for the weekend. So my mum told my sister to drop her daughter in to my house at 5!!! thats the last thing im going to want to come home to feeling groggy after the d & c. The house will be trashed (my two are 5 & 6, and my niece is 6) I was kind of hoping she could have kept my 2 calm and got them to bed for me. There would be no chance of that with my niece here, they would all be hyper and wide awake! So now I have no babysitter as I told her no way. Its an added stress i can do without. Plus im a little upset with my sister as I would have thought she would probably come and see me after d & c, I am always there for her, and drop everything every time she needs me. They are only going to see family so she perhaps could have gone the next weekend.

Perhaps its just me being really irrational, but I feel so low at the moment, and every tiny thing or added stress is really getting to me. I dont think im coping very well. Sure im going through the motions, getting up, showered, taking care of children etc (and putting on a brave face for them), but I feel so terrible inside. I also get the impression that no-one really understands, and is wondering why im not over it by now.

Thanks so much for listening.

troynicole's picture
Joined: 12/06/07
Posts: 151

I'm sorry you are having a rough day-it's ok though to feel the way you do. I would be upset if I were in your position. It seems like they are being insensitive to the fact of what you are going through-have you told them how you feel and suggested to your sister she postpone her trip? Maybe telling her you really need her might make her think about it more. I'm glad you put your foot down and said no about taking her child though-it will be hard enough handling your own. You may not feel tired, but you are going to want as much calmness as you can have for a few days. Your emotions will be going crazy afterwards. Just be sure to tell everyone how you are feeling and don't take on more than you want to right now. You need the help so don't be afraid to ask!

I hope tomorrow is better for you!


Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

hugs, hugs hugs. Even if you feel you are being very emotional. I fully understand what you are going through. I find you reacted reasonably, I would have doen the same. ANd i would expect my sister to be there for me too.
Do you have any neighbor or friend whom your girls know that could stop in and spend a little time with the girls. It doesnt hurt to ask. THis isnt the time to feel embarrassed about asking. ANd who knows you may find out that you have a whole bunch of good friends who are only waiting to give a hand.


Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I have nothing left emotionally day to offer other tha a :bighug: I sooo know how you feel!!! You be as sad as you need to be, and don't let the way others feel you should be feeling affect you. TALK to your Dr. He can help you get through some of the psychophysical crap too. This is a really low time, but you'll come out the other end of it. It's hard, and it takes time. And, really, no one does understand exactly the way you feel right now. Don't make excuses for them, you feel the way you need to feel right now.

shellyhudson's picture
Joined: 01/13/07
Posts: 814

One, even if you are being "irrational" as you put it, you are entitled to do so. Two, you are coping amazingly well. It is huge in itself just to get up and get out of bed. My biggest piece of advice is just to take each day one breath at a time until you are strong enough to graduate from breath to moment. Time is the great healer. We all learn to adjust to a new "normal". Unfortunately, no matter how much we wish it, the world doesn't stop spinning just because we need it to.


Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

You are going through a rough time and are entitled to feel a little sensitive to things - esp when your family s/b there for you and they aren't. Maybe you could talk to your sister and see if she could change her plans?