a few questions

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Joined: 07/16/07
Posts: 8
a few questions

I posted yesterday that I found out on Friday this pregnancy has resulted in a blighted ovum. I am having a 2nd u/s on Wed to confirm and then decide what to do next. My doc originally said that I would not need a D&C and they would give me pills to induce a m/c. But now I wonder if I would prefer to have a D&C. I am just so unsure. With the pill, does anyone know how long it can take to work? What is the follow up like to make sure everything is out? Is the recovery longer for the D&C? These are questions I will definitely ask my doc, but just wondering if anyone who has been through it has any insight. Can you think of any other questions I should ask my doc? Thanks so much in advance!

troynicole's picture
Joined: 12/06/07
Posts: 151

I have had 2 D&C's because too much time had passed between when my babies actually died and when we found out. The risks with a D&C are higher than taking the pill because of the anesthesia and a surgical procedure. You would have a few mild cramps afterwards and then bleed for a few days. It is not painful. Taking the pill you would of course have to pass the baby which you would want to prepare yourself for. I know i personally couldn't handle it and was glad when my doctor didn't even ask what I wanted to do, but some people can-so i say whatever your preference is, talk to your doctor and let him know. I only know one person that has taken the pill and they said they just bled for a few days afterwards.

Either way, I'm sorry again for your loss-there is no easy way to get through this but hopefully the support from the ladies on this site will help. Take care!

Nicole

:bighug:

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

It really depends on how far along you are. And then it depends on what you can emotionally tolerate. Passing the baby naturally is longer, and generally more painful. You also run the risk of infection (depending on how long your cervix stays open). Also I have read it can take up to six weeks to miscarry naturally. This pill will speed the process up, but it will still likely be painful and long. However, I truly believe, that this is the best for you physically. I, myself, wanted to go this route when I m/c at 15 weeks. However, you have to be able to handle it emotionally, which is not something I was prepared to do, inspite of thinking it was the better route physically.

I actually had a D&E, which is a little different, but the recovery etc. are pretty much the same. It is surgery, so you have those risks, plus there are very minimal risks of hemmorage, perforation of the uterus, and even hysterectomy. Those risks are very minimal, and IME the procedure itself was great (as far as that can be, KWIM?). I bled for a bit afterward, like a postpartum bleed. Doc put me on meds (Methergine) to stop the bleeding. That was Thursday morning, and I have not bled since it stopped completely that afternoon. The physical pain was minimal....only slight cramping, and practically nothing after they turn of the Pitocin.

It's totally a personal decision. For me, right after the D&E was over, I was very glad I made the choice to do it. It wasn't bad, and it allowed me to begin moving on an healing.

:bighug: I am sorry for your loss.

Shelly

shellyhudson's picture
Joined: 01/13/07
Posts: 814

I am so sorry for your loss. Please do what your heart tells you is the right thing to do. I wish you the best and I wish you peace.

Shelly

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I think it depends on how far along you are. Personally I could not m/c naturally, passing the baby naturally would have mentally destroyed me. I had delivered my daughter naturally at the hospital and then had a d/c to remove the placenta. I was 16 weeks. I hope whatever you decide you find peace in.

I will be thinking about you,
Robin

Joined: 07/05/07
Posts: 29

With both of my losses I opted for natural m/c (both blighted ovums). I felt better about letting my body handle things and it worked out better for me. I think it should be your personal choice though, as long as there isn't a reason medically that you would need the D&C.

Joined: 09/18/07
Posts: 371

You have such a difficult decision ahead of you. I wish there was something more I could do.:comfort:

Antionette

Lily Maria Kathleen :angel1: August 10, 2007

squirlyj's picture
Joined: 11/06/05
Posts: 121

With my m/c I decided to let nature take it's course. My SIL had recently taken the pills and had horrible vomiting and diarrhea, which are 'normal' side effects. I didn't want to take the risks of surgery, either.

I miscarried 6 days later. The whole process took about 4 hours. It started with PMS style cramps for a couple of hours (I could still make dinner, etc, but they were annoying.) Then, the contractions got stronger and closer together. For the last hour, I laid on the bed, not wanting to talk to anyone, but it was definitely bearable. You could always get some pain meds from your doc if you were worried.

Once everything came out, the cramping subsided almost right away.

I hope you find something that works for you. Everyone is different.

Anngie60's picture
Joined: 01/28/07
Posts: 630

Personally i couldnt handle having a natural m/c. Plus after 3 weeks my body didnt seem to be doing anything. The D+C was no where near as bad as i thought it would be, just period type crampy and heavy bleeding for 2 days, then no cramps with on off light bleeding since. - it has no been 1 week 3 days. I was also advised that i may have to have a D+C anyway if my body didnt m/c properly. I am glad i made the choice i did now, i think it has enabled me to try and move on and look to the future a little more. I hope this helps (((HUGS)))

Joined: 01/25/02
Posts: 2023

I tried to wait it out for a natural miscarriage, my doc advised waiting only 2 weeks, since my sac was only 6wks, and I should have been 9wks. Anyhow, at 11 wks I had the d&c. I bled heavier the first few days, and then light bleeding on and off for 2wks. I took the pain meds as everyone advised, and it did help, though I hate the side effects of pain meds, and besides the emotional stuff, it made me really ornery. Wink

I also responded more on the ttcal board. Hugs!

flutterby4's picture
Joined: 09/04/07
Posts: 219

TMI~sorry

First I am so sorry for your loss. Using the pills was the best choice for me. I had a missed m/c at 10 weeks. I was given the pills on 9-11-07 at about 2 pm and I had to go back into the office on 9-12 for a u/s to make sure the pills had worked. They had and that was that. By the same time the next day the u/s confirmed it was over, all but some cramping. I bled off and on for a couple weeks, but it wasn't bad. After 3-4 days, there wasn't even enough to really need a pantyliner. Just some spotting. The cramping was painful, worse than AF, but I was given meds for that too. B/f and I stayed home together in p.j's and spent those two days together watching movies and talking, just being together. I NEVER passed anything that looked remotely like a baby. It was like a really really bad AF with clots, but I only noticed the clots in the restroom. My OB told me that I would only pass clots or I wouldn't have done it. We were told to wait at least one normal cyle to TTC again, we decided to wait until 1-1-08, we just needed the extra time for ourselves to heal. From what my OB told me, the pills work the fastest, there is less risk of infection when you have the pills, there is no scraping like there is with a D&C so less chance of causing scar tissue that can affect fertility later, and like PP said, you don't have to have anesthesia or go through a surgical procedure. But only you know what is right for you...knowing what I know now, I wouldn't change a thing about our decision. Like others have said, it was a personal decision for us. Chris wanted to be with me through it, I wanted it over fast, and the whole process of the surgery, just seemed too much for me. I didn't want to wake up from surgery and our baby just be gone, kwim? Chris and I being home alone together through it all was completely the best for us. It is a tough decision. I am truly sorry that it's a decision you even have to make. PM if you'd like. Good luck. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

:bighug:
Amy

Joined: 01/04/08
Posts: 16

Everything that was already said is the great information. Do what is right for you physically and mentally.
For me, after finding out the the baby had already died (I was at 12 weeks, but the baby was 8w 5d), I just wanted to get it over with so I could move on and heal. I had the d & c. It wasn't bad. I spotted lightly for about 2 weeks after. How everyone recovers after procedures like that is different though.
Good luck! :bigarmhug:

Joined: 12/12/07
Posts: 18

I don't have any answers for you, but I did want to say I am sorry for your loss and I am thinking of you as you reflect on what is best for you and your situation.

I wanted to have a natural miscarriage, but my doctor said I had to have a D&C. Now it seems I may end up still have taking the meds for remaining products of conception. I don't say this to make it about myself, but rather just to share something I feel this experience has reminded me of which is that a pregnancy loss is largely a situation over which we have very little control. Try not to feel as though there's a right or wrong, and just know you are doing the best you can with a very tough and emotionally draining experience. And remember that the women here are very kind and supportive and here for you if you want to share or vent.

Wishing you peace in the coming days.

K.