First day since u/s (mc ment)
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Thread: First day since u/s (mc ment)

  1. #1
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    Default First day since u/s (mc ment)

    First of all I want to say thank you so much for all the support I received on my earlier thread, it was much needed.

    Today I woke up so sad, its the first morning I have woken up since finding out my baby had died, and it was so so so hard. I miss the morning sickness, and miss the joy of knowing im pregnant. I only got out of bed an hour ago, cause I cant face getting up and going through the day. I feel hopeless and so sad, and just want to sleep so I dont feel the pain anymore. I just dont know how ill get through this week waiting for my d & c. I just want to be pregnant again. I dreamt all last night that I was still pregnant and about my baby, and woke up this morning to face the horrible reality. My poor DH does not know what to do to help me. I cant tell him cause i dont know either.

    I feel bad complaining as I know some of you wonderful ladies have gone though so much more than me, but I just cant rationalise at the moment.

    Im not a religious person, but I pray to god, that he eases all of our pain.

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    I don't have any words that can make it better, but I just wanted to say, again, that I am sorry you are going through this. Try to be patient with yourself and each day. There will be good and bad days to come, and the more you allow yourself to the grieve the healthier it will be for you in the long run. I know that doesn't make it feel any better right now, but I do hope you know others are thinking of you.

    K.

  3. #3
    Mom22Boys+1Angel
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    Having just done this myself, I know exactly how you feel. I am so sorry for your loss and that you have to feel this terrible pain. I know it doesn't offer much hope right now, but, I promise it WILL get better. I never thought it would, but most days seem a bit easier than the first. Once you are ready, talk about it. It takes a while to get there, but I found that it really helps. You will still have bad days when it starts getting better, still, but you will get better. Grief is so hard, but I hope you find peace.


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    Quote Originally Posted by kt1981 View Post
    I feel bad complaining as I know some of you wonderful ladies have gone though so much more than me, but I just cant rationalise at the moment.
    Every loss is significant. You loss is no more or less significant than mine. Just because I had longer with my daughter does not lessen the pain. You are entitled to hurt just as much as any of us. Unfortunately you will hear people say things like " at least you weren't that far along, or at least you didn't get to know him/her. That is a load of crap. These were our babies and no matter how long we had with them does not lessen how much we loved them. Don't feel bad complaining. You have every right to complain and feel devastated. This is a safe place to do that because your loss will not be judged.

    You and I are the same. We both lost a child. I am here for you if you need to talk. I am so sorry for your loss and like you I wish I could take away the pain and hurt that we feel. Thinking of you.

    Antionette

    Lily Maria Kathleen August 10, 2007

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    Posting Addict troynicole's Avatar
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    I am so sorry you are having to go through this. I agree wtih Antionette though-everyone here has suffered a loss, no matter what stage we were in. Losing a baby is just that-so don't apologize. I know the next week is going to be hard for you-just take it one day at a time. It will get easier as time passes, but it will be hard at first. I know with my husband he kept asking me what he could do, but you are right-there really isn't anything but time that can make us "better." We will never forget...we go through the physical as well as the emotional pain unlike men. Just let him hold you while you cry...

    Just always remember to let your feelings out, don't keep them inside. We are all here for you!

    Nicole

  6. #6
    rh1430
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    Do not apologize for how you feel. You lost a child, a part of you. The minute we find out we are pregnant we have hopes and dreams for that child. You have to mourn not only your baby but those dreams you had for their future.

    I am sorry and you have found the perfect place for support. Vent, rant, get angry if you need to. We are all here for you.

    Robin

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    Hi again, im sorry you are feeling so bad, i promise you as time goes on, especially once you get the d&c out the way it will become better. I know what you mean though, thats the worse time when you wake up - for a split second everything is ok and then the reality suddenly comes back. We are always here for each other though.

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    Thank you once again for your wonderful words and support. I honestly cant tell you how much your words and support have helped me over the past 2 days. This board is such a source of comfort. Thank you for reassuring me that my loss is significant and that I have every right to feel pain. Sometimes with a m/c people make you think you should just put it behind you. I know that this is not true, we need time to grieve too.

    My parents came to see me a little while ago, and bought me a little rose tree to plant in my garden to remember our baby. I found this so comforting, and just for them to come in, cuddle me, and tell me how very sorry they were helped no end. My mum shed a few tears with me, and that really showed me she cared. It helps to know people recognise your pain. Now when I remember this time and the baby, I will always remember the support and kind things people have done and said to help me.

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    Super Poster angelchristian's Avatar
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    My heart is aching for your loss! It has been 5 weeks since I lost my baby boy-the days do get a little better. I still shed tears almost every day.
    I am so glad to hear that your parents have been a source of comfort for you. My mom brought me 3 roses when they came to visit right after my loss. Two of the roses were red (representing me and dh) and the third was white--for our baby boy, Christian David. That white rose lived for 3 weeks! It even had a new sprout come out of the stem. It was an amazing sight!
    I guess my point is that the support you get from family and friends will help you through the process of grieving. That rose tree will always serve as a beautiful reminder (not that we need reminding) of your angel.
    Don't try to stay strong! Cry! Get Mad! Yell! Do whatever you need to.
    My loss brought me to a whole new place spiritually! I find comfort in knowing that God is watching over me while his angels cradle my Christian!

    You are in my thoughts and prayers!!

    Annie

    Mommy to two furbabies and one Christian David 12/0/07

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