Guilt about TTC

4 posts / 0 new
Last post
sunnycrest's picture
Last seen: 4 years 8 months ago
Joined: 11/13/05
Posts: 57
Guilt about TTC

I am not TTC yet by any means, but in my mind i really want to try again as soon as we have the results of the autopsy next month if we can. We wanted that baby and have had two MC so far, but i still feel i want to give it a third try. But then i feel guilty. Like guilty on my little baby that we just lost that we are doing them a dis-service by moving on and moving on quite soon. Like replacing them. But it isn't that at all. I will never forget them. I can rationalise it all in my mind, but i still feel guilt.

Can anyone relate?

Last seen: 1 year 7 months ago
Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

Someone once told me something that gave me peace. He said that when you lose a little baby that the soul goes back into your heart and waits to be born again. You will always love your angels, but they would want you to be happy.

Last seen: 2 years 9 months ago
Joined: 01/25/02
Posts: 2023

Hugs. I struggled with this a bit, but I look at it this way, when you have a second child it is in now way to replace the one you already have. Your love just grows. I think ttc was part of the grieving process for me and dh, gave us something to work toward, ya know? Hugs and prayers!

MissyJ's picture
Last seen: 3 months 3 weeks ago
Joined: 01/31/02
Posts: 3289

This message was shared by one of my older children years ago in reference to someone's insensitive comment about having "another". I believe that it could be applied to your situation though as well (sort of a take-off of Rachel's):

"Love in our house is never divided -- but only is multiplied."

Think of a single candle flame.. and adding more candles creates more light correct? You aren't forgetting or moving *past* those that you have lost. They are most definitely included in your journey.