Horrific week, but now we can finally move on (long, sorry)
Hi all - just wanted to update, and get this info out there for anyone who might be going through this.
I had posted about whether to miscarry naturally or not, which was what I felt more comfortable with, so I went ahead and waited to m/c. I was at 16 weeks when I found out the baby died, and never really grew past 14 weeks. The Dr's told me the m/c could take up to a month, but more likely in a couple weeks. Well, in the third week I started to spot. I thought it would happen soon, but after one week of spotting, I was getting frustrated. I kept expecting it to happen at any moment. And that was quite unsettling.
Then, last week, I found out my aunt died after a short battle with cancer. I wanted to make it to the funeral this past weekend (a 2-hr flight) so I took the misoprostol pill the Dr's said would get the m/c process going. I inserted the pills Tuesday night. About 3 hours later, I started getting the cramps and more reddish bleeding. I was a bit relieved that it was FINALLY starting. Fast forward to 2am, and I started getting contractions. I had NO idea I would be getting such painful contractions. I really never even thought I'd be getting contractions at all for some reason. It was emotionally and physically exhausting. I put up with it for 5 hours, and they were coming every 2 mins or so, lasting up to a minute. I have never experienced such pain. It was horrible!! My dh rushed me to the hospital and both my Dr's were there and came immediately. One had even said she was worried about me, which really touched me. The nurses and doctors were AMAZING at helping me get through this. I have to say, going to the hospital in a small town makes a HUGE difference. They were checking in on me all the time, and I felt like I got to know every nurse so well.
Anyways, they pumped me full of morphine which really helped the pain. I asked the one Dr. as I was doubled over, leaning on the bathroom wall, if these were contractions - and when she said yes, I yelled (in my pain-induced, pi**ed off, sleepless state) that "if this is labour, I am NEVER having a baby!!!"
Later we talked about it and she told me how different the experience would have been if I was giving birth to a live, healthy baby, the endorphins and adrenalin and joy would have made a huge difference she said. So I changed my mind... pretty quickly actually.
Long story somewhat shorter - I stayed in the hospital overnight (because I live over 1hr away), I was dilated and they thought I was going to m/c soon. Well, the next day the gynecologist came in and said the fetus had shrunk and felt about 12 weeks. He was going to do the D&C and was quite annoyed by the fact that I hadn't had a D&C right away. He said "there is no way you should be in the hospital for this." I told him the other Dr's (GP's) wanted me to do it naturally (they actually even consulted his colleague, a fellow ob/gyn who suggested the pill route) and he retorted "well, maybe this will change their minds!"
The nurse and I talked about this and she just said it's differing opinons of surgeons and GP's - the surgeons are quicker to go to surgery.
So I had the D&C last Thursday and took the last few days off. I'm feeling somewhat empty right now, never made it to the funeral because of this nightmare, but at least this m/c is finally behind me.
I'm still bleeding, can't wait for it to stop - it's been 2 weeks non-stop. Now I look back and wish I had pushed more for the D&C, if I had known what I was going to go through I would have NEVER done it. Keep in mind, I had a natural m/c at 8 weeks (fetus about 6 weeks) two years ago, and it was MUCH different, quick and relatively painless. I don't know if the age of the baby makes a difference or if it's more a personal difference. But just wanted to share my story and hope no one else has to go through this nightmare.
Moderator of the pregnancy and infant loss support board
I am so very sorry...
Of course the contractions would be worse for full term....Prob the pain being less depending on how far along one was...That said...I had some pretty harsh contractions at almost 10 weeks...Nothing compared to the ones that I had at a bit over 38 weeks...but still painful none the less.
You are right...surgeons will push for surgery..usually. That said, always good to wait it out if emotionally/physically able....Only want a D&C if necessary..No sense in throwing the possibility of Ashers syndrome in on top of all else that one is dealing with.
I'm so sorry, that is just awful. I too miscarried at 16 weeks and my doctors did not want me to try to do it naturally (we found out the baby had died at an ultrasound). They had told me it would be a lot like labor and they didn't think it would be good both physically and emotionally. They did give me the option of being induced in the hospital, but we decided to just go ahead with the D&C.