I am beside myself...........M/C mentioned....TMI
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Thread: I am beside myself...........M/C mentioned....TMI

  1. #1
    Prolific Poster mishella69's Avatar
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    Default I am beside myself...........M/C mentioned....TMI

    Last weds I went in for my 3rd ultrasound. I was 8wks 5 days but the sacs were measuring only 1) 5 wks 1 day and 2) 5 wks 6 days. Two weeks prior to that they were both measuring the same at 4 wks 6 days and they both had a yolk sac. The whole pregnancy they were growing very slow so the dr said dont get your hopes up. When we were there last weds they said the yolk sacs disappeared and they were 99.9% sure that I would end up miscarrying. They didnt let us see the screen at first then they showed us quickly. They said the sacs were empty and I could have sworn I saw something but she was moving the wand around too fast. My dr wanted me to take Cytotec to start the process friday night. But I decided to wait till sunday night since my dh was off monday. He took care off the kids while I went through the miscarriage. Ok so I accepted it believing the experts and went ahead to do it.

    Now I am going to get alittle graphic so warning "TMI"..................As I was going through the miscarriage yesterday I kepted looking in the toilet for the sacs or anything that looked different from the clots. I read that the sacs were greyish in color not red like the clots. Well I finally saw something in the afternoon 16 hours after I took the pills. I took it out of the toilet and set it on toilet paper to examine it. It was very small the size of a dime and it was light tan in color. It looked exactly like an embryo at 6 wks!!! It had the ridges where the spine would develope and it look like a little bean and from the middle there was a tiny little string like thing. I touched it and it immediately crumpled where I touched it. I went to show my husband but I was in shock and didnt think of anything of it. Then this morning it finally hit me.............Was that my baby??!!!! Was there something really in there and either the drs lied or just didnt see it??? I looked on the computer and looked up " pictures of baby at 6 wks" and It brought me to babycenter.com and there it was a picture of an embryo that looked exactly like what I found. I am soooooooooo distraught over it. My dh said dont worry about it. The drs said the sacs were empty and they were sure you would miscarry." I said " how can I?? did I kill our baby??!!!" I just dont know what to think or where to turn or who to talk to!!! Any advice for me?? Did anyone experience this before??
    Last edited by missy8632; 05-11-2010 at 01:21 PM. Reason: remove siggy

  2. #2
    missy8632
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    I am so sorry for your loss. I would call the doctor. Even if it was the size of a 6 week old fetus, you were almost 9 weeks. If it was a viable pregnancy I would think you would have a heart beat by 9 weeks. You did not "hurt" your baby. If it "crumbled" when you touched it, then that is just reassurance that it was not a healthy pregnancy.
    Please do not blame yourself. I would have done the same thing in your situation.

  3. #3
    Supporter cdokter's Avatar
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    I am so sorry for your loss. I just wanted to reasure you. I lost two pregnancies in a row, both naturally, without drugs and both of my pregnancies (both stopped growing at about 6 weeks) had sacks that met your description. I can't imagine the horror you are feeling thinking that you may have harmed your baby. I don't think you did anything wrong, or harmful. I hope this helps you. It's hard enough to cope with the grief, try not to feel guilty too. Again, I'm so sorry.

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