Nine whole months since we lost our little man. In some ways it feels like ti was only yesterday, but in others it's unreal. In some ways it's like it didnt happen at all. That probably sounds wierd, but i just can't believe that we went through that and came out of the other side still okay!
I look back and i can really see how i've healed over the months. It's like at the beginning things were so dark and hopeless and yet it slowly got better and lighter. At the time i thought i was being normal, but when i look back i can see that i was withdrawn and quiet and not myself at all. Hopefully this mean that as time goes on i will continue to heal more and get better.
I will always miss Zane with every single breath i take, but i can see a future where i dont spend every waking moment sad and it feels okay.
Sarah, the night Zane left you, Paul and I were terrified for you guys. We had no idea how you were going to cope. We needn't have worried, as a couple, you are stronger than ever before. You have come on so so far since then and I can honestly say you continue to suprise me with your strength and valient persuit of a happy future. You honour Zane in so many ways, but you have never allowed this tragedy to define you. That's an acheivement in itself. I personally think of Zane every day and always will, he touched so many people.