Hi...My DH (39) and I (27) have been TTC for about 20 months. He previously had a vasecotomy and had a reversal in Jan 2008. After about 9 months of TTC we decided to seek the help of an RE. We were told he has an antisperm antibody which resulted from the vasectomy. We attempted 2 IUI's w/clomid which ended in BFN. Our RE told us we pretty much had no chance with these, but we felt it was worth an attempt before moving to IVF. We did our 1st IVF cycle. With that cycle I got 6 eggs, 3 mature and 2 fertilized. The 2 embryos quit growing before transfer, so that cycle was a bust. Our next cycle we tried a different protocol and got 10 eggs, 4 mature and 2 fertilized. The 2 embryos were slow growing but made it to transfer. We transferred both. On 6/27 we got our BFP!!! I had an u/s at 6w6d and saw baby and the heartbeat. Went back for another u/s 2 weeks later at 9wks and baby quit growing and there was no heartbeat. We were devastated. I had a D&C on 8/3. We are doing genetic testing on the baby to see what caused the m/c. My RE has come to the conclusion I have diminished ovarian reserve d/t the poor response of my IVF cycles. We asked him if he thought any testing was necessary (since I haven't had any blood tests done on me ever) and he said no, it's pretty obvious.
My DH and I have decided to take a break TTC w/treatments and are going to try naturally for about a year. I am going to start taking DHEA and DH is taking vitamins, supplements and steroids (prednisone) also. If after a year we are not pregnant, we need to make the decision to try IVF again with our own eggs or move to donor eggs. I am getting some cd3 blood testing done by my ob/gyn since I want some sort of diagnosis. I don't want to just "assume." My RE told me the next step is DE. My RE is very unsupportive and herds pts in and out of there like cattle. They are not very personable at all. We have made the decision to seek a 2nd opinion (even if that means traveling 7 hours) and will not do any treatments at our old RE unless it is monitoring for another clinic or if we use a known egg donor.
I can tell that this is a very supportive group of ladies. I am doing better emotionally since my m/c. The first week and a half was horrible for me. I couldn't see past the present. I didn't think things would get better. My DH kept telling me it will get better. His first wife passed away suddenly at the age of 32 so I knew what he was talking about. If he could get through the death of his spouse, there was a way for me to get through my loss. I think this m/c has hit be hard since it took us so much to get pregnant and it's going to take that much if not more to get pregnant again. I feel very angry and bitter. We had tried everything. I think to myself "Why did God have to take our baby? We loved it so much already." I feel like a horrible person for thinking the things I do. Not a day goes by that I don't think about our baby or my pregnancy. Everyday I think "I would've been ___ weeks pregnant." I was planning on telling our friends last Wed. That day was really hard for me. I think every pregnant lady can't wait to tell their friends and I never got the chance to. Thursday would've been 12 wks and able to stop my progesterone shots. I would've made it past another major milestone. I feel I am also grieving the loss of my fertility since I was pretty much told I'd never have a child that is genetically mine.
I see that a lot of ppl had a follow-up appt following their m/c. I have not had an appt. My RE didn't even mentioned me coming back there. All he said was for me to call a week after my D&C, which I didn't do since I was so angry with them. It is my opinion that they can call me for a follow-up call.
Enough of my rambling. I hope to meet lots of ladies on here that can help me through my struggle.