First off, I apologize for being long winded here and for the TMI info.
My name is Marcy and I am going through a miscarriage. It's just such a strange thing...
I am feeling a little lost and was happy to come to this board and was hoping to get some support/advice, etc. as well as to get my story off my chest.
I was 10 weeks pregnant. I had been spotting (pink and brown) throughout and had some cramping, but both times I had ultrasounds, we saw a heartbeat. Starting last Friday, I started bleeding red with clots...obviously not much I could do over the weekend, so, this past Monday, I went to the doctor. First, she did a vaginal ultrasound and, after looking for, I believe, at least 2 minutes, she found nothing. Then, an abdominal u/s found the sac. a final vaginal u/s found the sac, fetus and no heartbeat.
So, some time between October 15 and, I guess Friday, the little one's heart stopped.
I don't know what to make of all this. I'm numb and heartbroken and confused. I wanted him. I want him. He needs a mommy. But it's not going to happen. At least in this life.
I don't really understand what is happening in my body, or what the course of miscarriage is. I know I'm bleeding very heavily and, today, the cramps have been horrible. I'm not sure if the baby has passed through yet or how long the bleeding will continue. I end up analyzing every piece of tissue i pass. I apologize to sound like a drama queen, but, it sickens me to know that my baby was flushed down a toilet...
I hear of people having a miscarriage ("she had a miscarriage") and it always sounded like this one time event. But, I am having a miscarriage---a long drawn out process, where I have to live out every second of it. None of this is what I planned or expected. I hate it.
I am grateful for a wonderful husband who, after having a similar conversation with him as I just wrote, said he wished he could be going through this for me. i also have a beautiful daughter who is my everything.
I guess my questions are how long does this last? How long can I expect to bleed/have pain? Is this normal? When should I plan on going back to work?
I am so sorry for your loss. As for the bleeding/pain, I can't speak for anyone but myself. I just went through my m/c, and I was bleeding for 4 days. The first 3 were pretty heavy, the fourth was moderate, and after that it was just a few spots. Today is the first day without any blood, and I think today is the worst.
I am so sorry for your loss. It's not an easy thing to go through. When I had mine at 6-7 weeks, it was like having mini contractions along with bleeding. I had assumed the worse was over on a Wednesday & Thursday because I passed a lot of clots. However, it wasn't till Sunday that I fully miscarried and the cramps were so awful. After that I bled on and off for what felt like a month but everyone is different.
Anyway, I know that numb feeling...the sadness...the pain... Trying to understand why this happened, that's its just so unfair...
My bleeding last nearly 2 weeks, and then stopped. I may have been a bit on the longer side since I had placental tissue left behind, but it definately slowed after about a week. I hope you can find some sense of peace with this situation and I wish you all the best. You'll be in my thoughts...
You're right. Miscarriage sounds like a one time event word, but not only is it a lifetime event, it takes the very breath out of you some days.
I began spotting in my tenth week, told that I was having a m/c when they found no heart beat. Bleeding wasn't heavy like a period, just there. I didn't pass the remains of my child until week 16, and it looked like she had grown to be almost 12 weeks.
I'm so sorry for your loss, and hope that you are comforted and supported through this.