Missed Miscarriage - Living In Limbo
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Thread: Missed Miscarriage - Living In Limbo

  1. #1
    Mega Poster Malenkaya's Avatar
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    Default Missed Miscarriage - Living In Limbo

    My entire experience this time around has been difficult and and the medical support I've received has been less than impressive, so I'm here now to share and basically try to get it out of my system.

    My LMP was May 29th. I had two betas run immediately (I'm 36 and have had 2 previous m/c.) The first one was 226 and the second was 1054. The doctor thought the first number was low (without a point of reference) and the second was "fine." I knew they were both high based on how early I was and when I had the first u/s, they dated the pregnancy a week smaller than what I had thought it was, making the betas look even higher in comparison. When the doctor dated the pregnancy she ended up calling the days the betas were drawn as days 4 and 8 DPO. Absolutely ridiculous but she said she "wasn't concerned." Well, that made one of us.

    The first u/s was 7/21 and the pregnancy was dated at 6w2d and heartbeat was 107. Six days later they repeated, found 6 days of growth, dated 7w1d and the heartbeat was 162. Doctor said everything was perfect. For me it felt like something was off from the beginning.

    Started to spot a bit of brown blood on 8/11. Went to the doctor on 8/13 for "peace of mind" and the u/s measured the baby at 6w5d and there was no longer a heartbeat. I had to wait an entire week after that to hear from my doctor (I saw the "on call" doctor that day and was told my regular doctor would call the next day). I was told I could wait for my body to do it naturally or have a D&C. In talking with a nurse before actually hearing from the doctor I was told of the medication I could take to push my body to finish the process. I decided to take that route as I really don't want the D&C unless it becomes medically necessary.

    I took the first dose on 8/21. Very little happened. I was out of town from the 24-29th, so I wanted to try the medication first. I stopped spotting completely and this past Tuesday I was given another dose - a higher dose this time. Again, very little happened.

    I now have a call in to my doctor (although it's going again to an "on call" doctor as my doctor is out) to see if they will give me a third and possibly higher dosage.

    Anyone ever had this problem with a missed miscarriage? My concern is that my body, for what ever reason, won't do it on it's own and doesn't seem to be taking any cues from the medication either. I will have the D&C if it comes to that, but I have had a natural m/c before and would prefer that than the shell out he $3000 it will cost with the insurance to have the doctor do it.

    I'm tired, I'm stressed and hate living my life in limbo.

  2. #2
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    I'm so sorry for what you're going through. My situation was different than yours so I'm not sure what advice to give. Is the medication they are giving you called Methotrexate?

  3. #3
    Mega Poster Malenkaya's Avatar
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    Thank you. It's actually Cytotec (or more specifically the generic called misoprostol).

    I switched doctors today and spent half an hour on the phone with the new one this evening. She wants me to wait one more week and if I haven't naturally passed everything on my own (or induced by the drugs, won't be able to tell at this point) she wants to schedule a D&E. She does the suction rather than the scraping, which is what I was really trying to avoid. She's also very much about letting your body do it naturally, but she has a time limit (a month from knowledge of the loss) to prevent infection. She has the attitude and points of view that I share and I felt very comfortable with her, so I'm happy with how I believe she will handle it from here.

    She was very apologetic about the other doctor and I have high hopes of a good doctor/patient relationship with her.
    Last edited by Malenkaya; 09-04-2009 at 12:06 AM.

  4. #4
    rh1430
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    My last miscarriage was like yours. I started to bleed though with the high beta numbers. It slowly dropped over 3 weeks time. It was a horrible experience and I felt very much in limbo land.

    I am so happy that you have found a doctor that you trust. Having a good doctor is a huge part of the process.

    I am sorry about your loss but hope the process is as painless as possible.

    Sending you hugs.
    Robin

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    That's great news that you found a good doctor KUP on how everything goes.

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    So strange. My LMP was May 28th...and basically had the same timeline as you, with bleeding starting the same week (around 8/10). I, too, lived in limbo for several weeks but chose to be hopeful. I guess it is just good to get all the medical stuff taken care of so it is easier to move on (if there is any way to make it easier). Somehow for me, the D&C was less traumatizing that I thought it would be. But my body did start to m/c on its own.

    Good luck and I hope you find peace with whichever process occurs.

  7. #7
    missy8632
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    to everyone!

  8. #8
    Mega Poster Malenkaya's Avatar
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    *child ment*

    Thank you ladies. I'm kind of a mess right now, dealing with not only the m/c, but also with the fact that my birth board (from my DD, not on this site) for some reason has decided to turn on me because of the "m/c that is lasting forever." This is a group of ladies I've communicated with almost daily for close to the last 2 years. And it's not just about the m/c, but my life in general. Suddenly one of them says "I don't believe 99% of what comes out of your mouth." The fact that I worked in Hollywood many years ago, gave birth to my daughter at home - after the hospital sent me home - and now this stuff with the doctor and the "m/c that won't end." So suddenly I'm a liar and I never did anything to these people so I'm completely perplexed by the entire situation. I've never been anything but honest with these people and after being shown some of my "inconsistencies" I promptly responded to each and every one, pointing out what they misread or providing the information that was apparently left out so that they would understand what I was saying did not contradict something else. I thought these boards were about sharing and support, but they all turned into animals ready to attack. And their timing could not have been worse.

    I just feel lost after the entire incident.

    BTW, I now have an appointment with the new doctor on Tuesday and a D&E scheduled with her at an outpatient facility on Wednesday morning.

  9. #9
    missy8632
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    I am sorry honey, do I need to beat someone up? I have had a CRAPPY few days and it will feel good to punch someone. With friends like that, who needs enemies?

    Unless someone has had a loss, it is hard for them to understand how many areas of your life it has impacted. Hang in there honey and feel free to post as much as you want here.

  10. #10
    Mega Poster Malenkaya's Avatar
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    Thanks. I think I'm doing alright. The sad part is that some of these people have had m/c before. The one who started it, I honestly don't know her history. But I've now been banned from the board for sharing the fact that they treated me like crap.

    I feel like I should just let it go, but I didn't do anything wrong. It's very frustrating.

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