mothers day is killing me!

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HopefullySoon's picture
Joined: 01/31/08
Posts: 163
mothers day is killing me!

I can't believe I have to celebrate mothers day without my sweet baby girl. This week has been so hard for me, having to see and hear everything about mothers day. It is like a stab in my heart every time and only makes me yearn to have my baby back more. I keep wondering how I will make it through tomorrow, but I guess I just don't have a choice. I know I am a mother even if my daughter isn't here,but it is terrible to think about tomorrow without Zara with me.
I haven't posted much lately. I have been in a funk. All I do is go to work, work too much, come home eat dinner and go to bed. I can't help but constantly think of Zara. She was the most beautiful person I have ever seen. I was over my sister's house yesterday playing with her baby. He was born 3 weeks before Zara. He is smiling and laughing like crazy, but it just makes my heart hurt so much to see him growing up knowing our baby will never get the chance to do that. Life is hard. Now I have 3 cousins pregnant in my family. One cousin already has 4 kids, another has 3, and the 3rd, this is her first kid. It fills me with so much envy. I feel like my life continuously gets worse. Can't a sister get a break?!?!?!
I am totally like the scrooge at Christmas time, bah humbug...I see nothing happy about it being mothers day tomorrow. I should probably keep my butt at home so I don't bring everyone else down with my grumpiness! Smile
Thanks for letting me vent.

MrsSchepp's picture
Joined: 12/30/06
Posts: 496


deborah74's picture
Joined: 12/14/05
Posts: 698


I watched ellen yesterday and it was a mothers day special. The audience was full of very pregnant women and they all got tons of free stuff for baby. I couldn't help myself but to watch it and wish I was one of them.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I am so sorry for your loss of beautiful Zara, and I share your pain.

I'm glad you vented here -- it's healthy! We all understand and care about you, and we're going to help you through this.

Please post again whenever you need to.

Great big bear hugs,