I couldn't figure out why, after so long doing well, I suddenly felt terrible again. It was like my grief started all over again. It was my DH that pointed out to me that it was probably because I got my period that day. I'm on birth control and I'm not due for my period but since I'm new on the method, I got some spotting. My DH figured out that the spotting was too much of a reminder of my loss and probably set me off again. What a guy eh. Having a reason for a new wave of grief made me feel better (like it was okay to feel that bad for a while again). He also took that time to point out that he knows that October (our EED) will be a bad month and that he understands. He is not really the type of guy to start hard discussions or share his grief. He's very quiet in his support. But he told me that he finds himself staring at babies and actually ahd the urge to ask a random stranger if he could hold her daughter. Just knowing that he gets these waves too made me feel normal again. I'm so proud of him for getting it and I'm so lucky to have him. I just wanted to share my momentary good feelings with you guys. We have so few good feelings that I kind of wanted to make a big deal out of mine. Thanks for listening.