My latest loss (x-posted)

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My latest loss (x-posted)

I didn't realize this board was here as well as the TTCAL. I am finding both SO therapeutic (thanks to everyone who shares their stories and provides support, it's so helpful), I would like to post my story here as well:

Hi all, I found such solace in this board and a lot of answers when I had my last m/c - 2 years ago. We took quite a break from TTC and were very excited when we found out we were pregnant this past Nov. I made it to almost 17 weeks, but the baby had stopped growing around 14.5 weeks. We went in for an amnio and they realized he/she was small, but weren't sure why. It sent up red flags, though my Dr. told me not to panic. Yeah, right.

Anyways, the next week, the amnio was rescheduled but the baby had no heartbeat. My world stopped. I didn't hear a single word the Dr. said after "I have some sad news, your baby has no heartbeat..."

Now the Dr's prefer me to m/c naturally, so here I sit, waiting. I actually prefer it this way as it gives me some control over things. I want to say goodbye to my LO in person.

This is heartwrenching. How can I ever go into another pregnancy and not panic the whole 9 months?? My emotions are all over the place, but for the most part I am pi**ed off at the world. I'm sure I'm not very enjoyable to be around. I know it'll pass with time as I grieve for my baby, but that seems like a lifetime away...

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Last seen: 7 years 10 months ago
Joined: 11/19/05
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I am so very sorry you lost another baby Sad What a horrible way to find out.. Sad

As far as going on to have another pregnancy....It never gets easy...And yes, you will worry the whole 9 months...I won't lie to you about that..But you will have many joyous times as you pass certain milestones as well..

Sending you many :bighug:

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Last seen: 5 years 2 months ago
Joined: 09/18/07
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I am so sorry about your babies. I am glad that you found these boards though. They have really helped me.
:comfort:

:bighug:

Antionette
Lily Maria Kathleen :angel1: August 10, 2007

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Last seen: 1 year 6 months ago
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I'm so sorry for your loss.
With my last m/c, I felt like I lost the ability to enjoy any future pregnancies as well. I'm currently not TTC, but DH and I are talking about it, and I'm already having intense anxiety.
I hope things go quickly and smoothly for you. My only advice would be to have a lot of support nearby. I was shocked by the physical toll my m/c had on me. Fortunately my mom was able to come stay with me and DD while DH was at work, and it was a huge help.
:bigarmhug:

HopefullySoon's picture
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Last seen: 4 years 7 months ago
Joined: 01/31/08
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I am so sorry for your loss. Please take care of yourself.

shellyhudson's picture
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Last seen: 6 years 5 months ago
Joined: 01/13/07
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I am so very sorry for all of your losses. I had a stillborn child as well. Damien was born sleeping at 37 weeks. I am glad that you feel solace here. Please post or vent or scream and cry here whenever you need.

If you want to, feel free to pm me anytime you need to.

I wish you peace and serenity.

shelly

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Last seen: 1 year 6 months ago
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Thanks so much, I feel so much healing reading all of your words.

mom@41 - good point, I suppose with all the worry in future pregnancies there WILL be some good parts and positive things. I hadn't even considered that.

So sorry for all your losses as well, god this is incredibly hard.