My story (m/c ment)

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Last seen: 4 years 7 months ago
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My story (m/c ment)

I found out yesterday, at 10 weeks and 5 days pregnant, that my baby had stopped developing. I had some bleeding and cramping in the morning so, even though it was light and the cramps were minimal, I went to the ER. Preliminary tests couldn't find a heartbeat and showed no movement. A follow up u/s confirmed the baby only measured 8 weeks 5 days.

Everyone was wonderful, going out of their way to tell me it wasn't my fault and to push me through for the tests so I didn't have to wait (they were fully booked). The only thing that I found a little crass was when the gynacology registrar came to talk to me he just said 'I've looked at your u/s and the pregnancy isn't viable.' It just seemed to be trivialising the experience. It isn't trivial to me. My baby died. My heart is breaking. That isn't trivial!!!

I have to go back in for a d&c tomorrow morning. Coincidentally, tomorrow is my birthday. Yesterday was my sister's birthday. I found out I was pregnant the day after DH's birthday and the baby was due on my niece's birthday. So many days that will be reminders of what we have lost. Days that I wont forget Sad

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Last seen: 2 years 10 months ago
Joined: 01/25/02
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oh sweetheart! Hugs hugs. I'm sorry you are having a d&c, and especially on your birthday. I am sorry to hear that the registrar person was so insensitive, it may be worth saying something about, because yes, a little more compassion should be given.

I've had two losses at about the same time, found out through u/s, and it is just heart breaking. Hugs and prayers.

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Last seen: 1 year 8 months ago
Joined: 03/16/15
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Im so sorry that you are having to deal with all of this. It is such a terrible thing that I dont wish upon anyone! The D&C should be quick. Im sorry that you have to have surgery on your b-day Sad I hope that you can have a little bit of something good on your b-day. BiG HUGS!!

shellyhudson's picture
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Last seen: 6 years 7 months ago
Joined: 01/13/07
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:bigarmhug:

I am so very sorry for your loss.

youbeme's picture
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Last seen: 5 years 6 months ago
Joined: 07/08/08
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I am so sorry for your loss. No one can quite understand your pain like the wonderful women here. My gyne resident asked me this question "Are you sad?" I about kicked the jerk right in the face! Some people should never speak in my opinion.

:bigarmhug:

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Last seen: 1 year 9 months ago
Joined: 06/10/07
Posts: 1692

I'm so very sorry for your loss. And to have this done on your birthday. My heart aches for you and every one else experiencing a loss. Hugs. :bighug:

Hessengirl's picture
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Last seen: 5 years 9 months ago
Joined: 10/02/06
Posts: 42

I'm so sorry for your loss and having the d&c on your birthday. not really something to celebrate :bighug:

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Last seen: 4 years 8 months ago
Joined: 12/27/07
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I am so sorry for your loss! That is exactly what happened with my little boy---except he was a little farther along... so I remember hearing words very similar to those! I wanted to jump across the test and strangle the OB! I'm thinking of you lots today, D&C's are never easy!

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Last seen: 1 year 8 months ago
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I'm so sorry that you have to be here. I will tell you that the women here are wonderful and can help thru any situation, let you vent, cry, scream, and even pray. You can talk here and can say anything. Take things one moment at a time. ~hugging you tightly~
Lisa

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Last seen: 1 year 8 months ago
Joined: 03/16/15
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I am so sorry for the loss of your baby. Yes, it's hard -- so very hard. And yes, some medical staff can be so insensitive, so 'clinical' -- I wish I could smack that registrar for you! Grrr! I'm glad that everyone else was helpful though.

It's very sad that you 'qualify' to be here, but the fact is that here you will find a very caring and supportive community. Please write in whenever you need to -- whenever those birthdays pop up, or for anything else. We're all here for you, and we're going to help you through this.

Bear hugs,
Nicole

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Last seen: 4 years 7 months ago
Joined: 07/30/06
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Thank you so much. It does mean a lot to have somewhere to go where I feel like people understand. And where they don't expect me to miraculously be 'over it' a week after it happened.

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Last seen: 3 years 1 month ago
Joined: 08/26/04
Posts: 81

:bighug: I'm so sorry for your loss. Unfortunately, some people just don't get it.