Sad to be here, but happy to have a place to go...

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Last seen: 8 years 4 months ago
Joined: 06/14/04
Posts: 12
Sad to be here, but happy to have a place to go...

To begin, an introduction :
At the end of August I found out I was pregnant. Although it was a big surprise, as my husband and I thought our family was complete, we quickly adjusted and became very excited to be having another baby. I have a DSD, 8, and we have a DD 2 1/2 together.

Sadly, on Tuesday at my first Dr. appointment, I found that my baby had stopped growing around two weeks ago, and had no HB. I was almost 11 weeks along. Later that day I started bleeding heavily and cramping. I went back to see the doctor yesterday and he seemed to think the miscarriage was complete, but gave me some medication to make sure that I passed "everything". I'm still cramping alot today, and feel pretty yucky. Emotionally, I think I'm doing okay, though I'm feeling sad and mostly want to be alone.

The strange thing today, is that I can't seem to stop thinking about when we can try again. Is that weird? I didn't think I wanted another baby, but now it is all I can think about. It seems so cruel to have just gotten used to the idea of totally changing our plans for our family, then to have it taken away. Now I just can't go back to thinking our family is complete. My husband thinks we should take some time to think about what we really want for our family, but I just want to get pregnant again as soon as possible and have a baby. Maybe I'm still just too hormonal.

The other really weird thing is that we are the third couple in my husband's family to have miscarriage in the last month Sad

Anyway, thanks for letting me vent, and for having a place that I can come to share.

Last seen: 1 year 8 months ago
Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I am so sorry for your loss. Vent here anytime the ladies are fantastic.

You are going to have a rollercoaster of emotions in the next couple of weeks. Remember to be patient and gentle on yourself.

As for trying again, most drs recommend 2-3 cycles.

Sorry again for you loss.

Last seen: 8 years 1 month ago
Joined: 11/19/05
Posts: 456

I am so sorry for your loss Sad

Your feelings of wanting a baby right away are completely normal....A women usually wants to either get pregnant right away...Or, they can't even entertain the thought of getting pregnant....Both feelings are very normal

Give yourself some time.... We are all here for you to get you through those rough days ahead :bighug:


shellyhudson's picture
Last seen: 6 years 7 months ago
Joined: 01/13/07
Posts: 814

I am so very sorry for your loss. As for the desire for another pregnancy, that is totally normal. I think that most of us here went through that. Your emotions are going to be all over the map for a while. Just remember that there are no wrong ways to feel. Each loss is very personal and completely devastating. I would wait a few cycles and have a very long and personal talk with your dh. Both of you have experienced a great loss and men react/handle this loss in a completely different manner than women. I pray that you find peace.