Siggies

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Siggies

Never ever before have siggys ever bothered me, ever. I have never cared what people have. Now I find myself avoiding certain people because I don't want to look at their pregnancy tickers.

I feel like such a jerk for that. I guess it will go away as the rawness of the pain goes away.

squirlyj's picture
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I hear ya. It took a while before I could even read some people's posts. I still don't respond sometimes because it's so hard to congratulate someone for getting something I just lost.

I also really hate preggo complaint posts right now. Especially when people don't think and put preggo complaints in their response to one of my posts. I just can't take it.

Sorry to hijack. I just know how you feel.
:bigarmhug:

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Hi
This is a safe place to be because there are no pregnancy tickers here. We just have our angel dates.

I am here if you need me. Sorry you are hurting so much.
Antionette

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:bighug:

Completely understand. It's still hard for me to see tickers and such and it's been almost 13 yrs. Maybe just turn on the not seeing siggy option when you know your having a bad day? I know i avoid some boards all together when i know i would react badly to seeing them.

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I've recently suffered my loss (yesterday) and I find it harder and harder to see signatures and even "I can't believe it!!!" type posts where I know the outcome is going to be a pic of a pos HPT. I can't even congratulate my friends.

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I don't think it's wrong of you hun. I still get that sometimes and it's been 4 months since our last loss. As for the pregnancy complaints, they are usually made by people who have no idea what it's like to suffer a loss. It's painful for us to see, but in a way it's good i suppose because those people still have the wonderful, naive, happy go lucky view of pregnancy untainted by this pain of loss.

The whole thing about siggies and pregnancy talk is why this board is wonderful at a time of loss. It's a safe haven, which doesn't allow any signatures at all. If people leave their signatures on their posts, regardless of what is in them, they will be removed. If a person consistantly leaves on their signature they will be contacted by PM. Even if it doesn't have a pregnancy ticker in it or a picture of a baby. People's circumstances change, and when they do, their signature will change and update on all the posts they have ever made all over the site, including here. It's just safer to not allow them at all. It's also the reason why we have to pre-warn people to sensitive issues when we post, such as PREG MENT or TTC MENT or LC MENT. It's a courtesy that allows the member the option to open the post, or not, depending on when they are ready. We also ask that regular posters think carefully about what is in their avatar. People in their grief don't want to see babies and children etc. in avatars either. Smile

Sarah
Mum to...
:angel2: Zane. Delivered by c-section at 41 weeks. Died due to Vasa Praevia. 16-17 October 2006
:angel2: Ada. Delivered by c-section at 25 weeks. Her heart just stopped. No explanation. 7 September 2007
Co-Host of Pregnancy & Infant Loss Support.

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"Jenn0113" wrote:

I've recently suffered my loss (yesterday) and I find it harder and harder to see signatures and even "I can't believe it!!!" type posts where I know the outcome is going to be a pic of a pos HPT. I can't even congratulate my friends.

I am so very sorry for your loss. Just wanted to say that.

shelly

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"Mom22Boys2005" wrote:

Never ever before have siggys ever bothered me, ever. I have never cared what people have. Now I find myself avoiding certain people because I don't want to look at their pregnancy tickers.

I feel like such a jerk for that. I guess it will go away as the rawness of the pain goes away.

Siggy's are hard to see. I guess that I am somewhat masochistic as I still participate in the board that I was part of before the loss. Sometimes I have to quit reading and stay away for a while. I hope that you feel some peace soon.

Shelly

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Hello ladies, I also wanted to drop in and let you know that there is an option in your User Control Panel to turn off siggies, images, and avatars for the entire board. (You can pick which, it's not all or nothing).

The option allows you to click to be able to see what is hidden so it would be your choice.

That may make your time outside this safe haven just a tiny bit easier.

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I am so sorry. You have every right to feel that way. I think it is normal.

Just wanted to send HUGS your way.

Robin

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i know what you mean, i feel the same. It is very very hard to see pregnancy tickers. I find it the hardest when i see tickers displaying the stage of pregnancy i should be at. It is very hard not to feel bitter, i guess after our losses this is perfectly normal (((HUGS)))

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Thanks for the idea. I just turned siggys off for now. Sad

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"Michelle23" wrote:

Hello ladies, I also wanted to drop in and let you know that there is an option in your User Control Panel to turn off siggies, images, and avatars for the entire board. (You can pick which, it's not all or nothing).

The option allows you to click to be able to see what is hidden so it would be your choice.

That may make your time outside this safe haven just a tiny bit easier.

OOOOOOHHH!!! That's brilliant, thanks Michelle!! Biggrin

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I had no idea there was that option! There are definitely some days I'd want to use that!

We don't have pg tickers or baby pictures on the Dealing With Infertility board either for those of you who might want to stop by.

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i have a hard time with em too. this maybe bad, but i also don't like being around pregnant ladies or ones that just had babies... it makes me shy away really quick. it sucks too because my sister in law is pregnant. she does a pretty good job of not bringing it up too much in front of me, but when she was complaining about morning sickness, i just wanted to say shut up!!! i'[m still quite bitter...

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"jmvogel8182" wrote:

my sister in law is pregnant. she does a pretty good job of not bringing it up too much in front of me, but when she was complaining about morning sickness, i just wanted to say shut up!!! i'[m still quite bitter...

It is hard to be around pregnant women. I'm glad she is generally good around you. It is difficult position to be in because I know that I complained during pregnancy but I would take it all on and more if I could have Lily with me. Are you close enough with your SIL to mention it bothers you to hear her talking about morning sickness.

Antionette

Lily Maria Kathleen :angel1:August 10, 2007

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I'm hoping she's past the morning sickness stage... she's 14 weeks now. i don't see her that often, she lives about an hour away... i think part of the reason why i'm so bitter about it is because she found out she was pregnant w/ her baby when i was losing mine...

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That is going to be a tough one. My sister was pregnant when I lost Lily. My nephew was born 4 weeks after I delivered Lily. It sucks but I am actually okay with my nephew. He is a constant reminder of Lily but I can hold him.

Antionette

Lily Maria Kathleen :angel1: August 10, 2007