I am just so mad today. My doctor's office wants me to repeat my beta again, but really whats the point in that? I know the numbers are not good, I know I will probably be losing my baby, and if my number has gone up a little again, that wont give us new info. If its going down, then I am bound to start bleeding, right? So why cant we just leave it alone and see the disaster at the next ultrasound on feb 4th? If I have not mc'd by Mon, we have to do the us to make sure regardless of what my beta is, so why have me waste a morning doing that? Im also sooo pissed, my dh is in Florida at a sales "meeting". Basically going out to dinners, snorkeling, having banquets, hanging out with his pals at work and having a couple meetings thrown in there while I am home waiting for my miscarriage to happen while caring for our other 6 kids! I cannot believe he went on this trip with me in this horrible place right now! Im also mad at myself and I guess everyone, because I cant even get help in case this happens because people are so nasty and they totally make the rudest comments about us having lots of kids, and I KNOW there would be awful comments made about "learning my lesson from this" by especially my mom. Im also annoyed because so many other ladies are having bleeding and cramping and this and that, but their babies are fine and I have not one symptom, and I know I am doomed, and I have lost this baby! I dont know if I would be having an easier time if I had symptoms or not, but I just feel so freaking annoyed right now! Sorry for the vent, I had a decent day, maybe Im just tired.