Ok, so now I'm just angry. It took forever to get pregnant, then I m/c, BUT then my crazy irregular cycle was actually normal after the m/c. At least it was for the first 2 months after our loss. Now at month 3~cycle day 39 and no freakin AF. For those first 2 months, my cycle had been exactly 25 days and I was so happy that it was predictable. Maybe a little short, but predictable. My thermometer was messed up so I have no idea what my temp has been like, CM was crazy eggwhite and now 'sticky' TMI...I know, but still no AF. I know it is stupid, but that is the one thing I was holding on to from this loss...'ok, I needed for all of this to happen, to fix whatever was going on with my cycle, my body, my hormones (which no-one could figure out) so I can carry a healthy happy baby to full term', I know that sounds wierd. And I thought that was what was happening, everyone did. But no, I'm back to square one, no baby, irregular cycles. I was even feeling a little more confident about when we TTC again, but now, there is no telling when or if I'll ovulate. It could take months, just like it used to. I'm so angry. I don't even know if O'ed this month, and I don't have many PMS signs going on (well maybe this attitude!), I took a test last week, negative...I guess it could be too early...but I know I'm not pregnant. I really do just know that I'm not. Not ready to be yet anyway. Just...ggggggggrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...
Thanks for listening~just needed to get that out somewhere,
I wish there was something I could do besides just be here to read your vents.
I don't know what it is like to have irregular periods. Mine have gone back to being incredibly heavy and LONG (after my son they were so light (and short) I could almost get away with pantiliners!!!!).
My friend has been going regularily to a fertility clinic and they do tests and tell her when she is ovulating. Not sure if that is an option for you.
Yes, we have been bad, unprotected and all. We had just been using withdrawl most of the time, I know that is ssooooo reliable , but he believes that we should just 'not try, but not try not to' and leave it up to 'fate' he says. I felt stupid even going and buying the test the other day, I know I'm not pregnant, I just don't FEEL pregnant. And for some reason I think I would know. It's probably just stress. I have been really stressed lately. Sorry AF is giving you issues though, mine may be late, but I don't want to deal w/cramps and headaches right now either...just can't please me.
As far as the fertility clinic for O testing, that's not a bad idea. I'm going to have to keep that option in mind. One problem for me is that no-one feels I need that kind of care yet...it took 5 months from the time we started TTC to get pregnant, and that isn't long...but what lingers in my mind, is the fact that I was married before...we tried...it didn't happen. It's like I'm the only one who thinks there is really a problem. Maybe I'm wrong and that would be wonderul, if not, I'll find out what it is one way or another.
I know things will be fine. I'm just having an off day. I'm so glad you ladies are here for me to talk to. Thanks for everything.
One problem for me is that no-one feels I need that kind of care yet...it took 5 months from the time we started TTC to get pregnant, and that isn't long...but what lingers in my mind, is the fact that I was married before...we tried...it didn't happen. It's like I'm the only one who thinks there is really a problem. Maybe I'm wrong and that would be wonderul, if not, I'll find out what it is one way or another.
I think women are very in tune with their bodies and just KNOW when something is wrong. I'm so sorry for your unpredictable cycles. I've never had a regular cycle, so I know your frustration all too well. I just wanted to say that you pay Dr's to take care of you, so if you feel that something is wrong, DEMAND testing hon. We'd only been TTC for 7 months when I demanded to be tested (since I was having irregular cycles) and I was diagnosed with PCOS and could be treated immediately. If your Dr doesn't want to run tests, find a Dr that will listen to you. You deserve answers.
You are completely right. And that's why I'm on my 4th OB in 2 years. This one finally did a laparoscopy and found endometriosis, but even she says that with the small amount that I have, I shouldn't have these issues. Even with the endo, I got pregnant within 5 months and it was my first pregnancy, first loss. Now I've asked for blood testing and such so we'll see what happens from there. Thanks again for listening.
I am so sorry that things have gone all wonky again. I really don't know what to say that might help you feel better. I wish that I did. I am sure that the holidays are not helping the situation any. Hang in there babe. Go eat some chocolate. That helps me feel better. At least for a minute or two. (((HUGS)))
hugs! I'm sorry that your cycle is off, mine is too, and it sucks. I was at 36 days after first af, then 26, now 29 with no sign of af and bfn yesterday. I just wish it would get back on track so I know what is going on, and hopefully get pg. Urgh!
Sorry, that was about me. . But know that I feel your frustration, and I'm sorry that no one around you really gets it.