Some people just don't get it

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Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852
Some people just don't get it

It is 6:45 am and I am hiding in my classroom because another teachers wife had a baby. He, of course, has pictures and is showing them to everyone. I walk down the hall and everyone is yelling and saying amazing things about his little boy. Man this sucks!!! No one got a chance to make a big deal out of my little girl. I am holding back the tears. I might be over reacting but don't they understand that I lost a baby and have some..I don't know..respect and go into his classroom to look at the pictures. Must they stand in the hallway where I am and scream about how cute he is and precious and oh babies love when you wrap them so tight they can't

I am glad that his baby is fine. I am happy that they never had to experience a loss, but darn it some of us have and we are still grieving.

Thanks for listening.I gotta go wipe away my tears.

Joined: 02/05/06
Posts: 33

Robin~ I am so sorry you have to deal with this. It does get easier, I promise. I am 7 years out from the loss of our son, Quinn, and almost 3 years since the loss of Elliot and there is still a tinge of pain when someone is holding a baby boy, or seeing a boy who is the age my sons should have been. It is not nearly what is used to be though. Don't rush the healing. Just when you think you are OK, it bites you in the butt, again. Hang in there sweetie. It will get better.

Erin~mommy to 2 angels

Joined: 09/18/07
Posts: 371


I hope you were okay the rest of the morning. I am so sorry that people just don't get it. I wish I could have been there to distract you and keep your mind off of his news and photos.

Give me a call if you need to talk. I'll PM my cell phone if you need me. After school I have that Van De Walle math workshop and then I have the sleep clinic tonight so I will probably only be home for about an hour tonight.

Huge massive enormous hugs being sent your way!:bigarmhug::bigarmhug::bigarmhug:


HopefullySoon's picture
Joined: 01/31/08
Posts: 163

I'm sorry Robin. Your subject says it all...people just don't get it. It is just not fair and it just hurts so badly.
Hang in there girl. I'm thinking of you.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I know how you feel. I have days where i really feel all of my m/c the early ones and the late ones and i cant even tolerate it. I have a lsew of nieces and nephews so it seems there is always a baby on the way. THere are days when i dont even want to hear about it AT ALL! SO let those tears flow hun. Grieve for all it is worth. My grandpa once said that each tear shed for a little angel becomes a precious stone in a crown of motherhood. My one aunt took 10 yrs of heartbreak to have a LO and she was a nurse.hugs and fuzzies.


rubber_da_glove's picture
Joined: 12/31/07
Posts: 1527

I know just how you feel. The dad I went back to work a guy at works wife had a baby and pictures were emailed around which I didn't really want to look at but no one thought about how I would feel about it. And when he came back he was given cards and presents.

I'm so sorry you have to deal with this, it's not nice that people don't respect your feelings too.


I hope your day gets better

Joined: 01/09/08
Posts: 19

Oh, hon, I'm so sorry you had a rotten day!

The first phone call I got on my first day back was the guy I work with ..."my wife had the baby!" he announced. I swear everywhere I go there is a pg gal or a baby. I don't mean toddlers, I mean newborns!
We were out to dinner and there were two gals holding newborns standing right next to me as we waited for a table. I had to turn my back and not look.


HopefullySoon's picture
Joined: 01/31/08
Posts: 163

I totally had a "pregnant people are everywhere day" after I posted a reply to you earlier today. One of the guys at my work, his wife is going to have her baby tomorrow so all I heard about today was that. It just sucks big time.

shellyhudson's picture
Joined: 01/13/07
Posts: 814


I am so sorry that no one is taking your feelings into consideration. Unfortunately everyone that has not experienced loss just expects you to "go forward". Thankfully they don't understand the depth of your pain and anguish. However, a little tact and courtesy isn't too much to ask.

:bigarmhug: :bigarmhug: :bigarmhug:


Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I agree...unless you have experienced a loss, they just DONT GET IT. I am very thankful the majority of the world has no clue, as I dont wish this pain on anyone. I am sorry for your loss, and I am sorry you experienced this pain today.

StephanieJune's picture
Joined: 01/19/08
Posts: 103

I am sorry that you had to go through that. Know that you can always come here to talk to people who do get it.

Joined: 05/04/06
Posts: 250



flutterby4's picture
Joined: 09/04/07
Posts: 219

Just wanted you to know I was thinking of you.