Still waiting(loss/ttc/childment)

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Joined: 12/09/06
Posts: 74
Still waiting(loss/ttc/childment)

My m/c was in Dec of last year and I am still struggling to get my cycles back to normal so we can ttc again. I want another child so bad and the waiting is killing me. My dd loves babies and is so great with them. It hurts everytime I see her with someone elses baby. Her face just lights up. If we can get pg in the next month or 2, dd will be 4 when the next one is born.

It sounds dumb but I'm so bummed that they will not be closer together. I really wanted my kids closer than my sister and I were in hopes that they would be closer than we are.

Yesterday we were at a birthday party and a friend of mine was there with her 2 1/2 month old. We were due about the same time. I've only seen her once since her son was born, just to painful to see what should have been. I held her little boy yesterday for the first time and all I could think is I should have one of these right now.

I think things would be a lot easier if I could get pg. For one thing it would stop all of the questions: When are you having another baby? Aren't you about ready for a 2nd child? Alaina should have a little brother or sister. etc etc. If they only knew!

Sorry to vent, I'm just sooo frustrated and no one gets it Sad

Joined: 11/19/05
Posts: 456

I am so sorry Sad I am so hoping you are able to become pregnant soon...

My brother in law used to ask all the time *when will dh and I have kids*...My answer would always be *we put that in God's hands a long time ago* He would never follow up...But on occasion, would still continue to ask! So, I know how frustrating/painful those kind of questions can be..

I am hoping that it will not be much longer for you :comfort:

Marie

Uropachild's picture
Joined: 08/09/05
Posts: 1176

I am so sorry your cycles are taking a while to settle down. I hope that your TTC hourney will be a swift one and that you are blessed with a sticky bean.

People can ask the most hurtful questions when they dont know your circumstances, i know. Maybe you dont want to tell them the truth, but i've found that if i have a scripted response prepared, like Marie suggested, those questions are easier to tackle.

:bighug:

Joined: 01/25/02
Posts: 2023

I can only imagine how hard it was holding your friends baby, when you should have one that age. Sad

hugs. I have always hated those questions. I think it is no one's business to ask when you are adding to your family. Especially because ppl do not tell everyone that they may be struggling with infertility, or suffering from a miscarriage, etc. My MIL is always asking. The next time she asks, I am telling her just that, that she should not ask ayone, because she doesn't know their situation.

As a side note, my younger sister and I are 5.5yrs apart, and while growing up we had our moments, we are super close now, closer than my sister that is 3yrs older than me. I am also very close now with my sister that is 12yrs younger than me. I think being close to your sibling has a lot to do with family dynamics than an age gap. Smile

I hope you can add to your family soon! Hugs and prayers!

Amber_daisy's picture
Joined: 10/17/06
Posts: 567

:bigarmhug:

Teresa, I hate that you're having to wait so long to get pregnant again! I can't imagine what that must be like for you. I so hope it happens for you very soon. And I agree with the pp...closeness doesn't just have to do with the age gap, but rather the family dynamics. Alaina is going to be an awesome big sister, and whether you have a boy or a girl, they're going to be so lucky to grow up with her. (((((hugs)))))

Joined: 12/09/06
Posts: 74

Thanks ladies. I wish I could figure out a scripted answer. It usually catches me so off guard that I just laugh it off. If dh is there he usually says something about soon or we are working on it.

My MIL is the worst, she's constantly nagging me about it and anytime I say something about being hot or wanting some ice cream she immediately assumes I'm pregnant. DH has talked to her several times and I think the last time he talked to her she must have gotten it because she hasn't said anything for over a month.

The age gap thing, good point, doesn't have to mean they won't be close. I only have one sister and we are 3 1/2 years apart and not close...maybe a bigger gap will help too...who knows.

I'm sorry I'm rambling...guess it just helps to still have you ladies to lean on...thanks again

Teresa

shellyhudson's picture
Joined: 01/13/07
Posts: 814

I am sorry to hear that you are having such a difficult time with your cycles. I commend you for holding a small baby, especially one that is so close to the age your angel should be. I hope that you are able to coceive soon as you so rightfully deserve. I am also sorry to hear that you keep getting those questions that aren't meant to be painful but cut so deeply.

I wish you all of the best.

shelly