unexpected feelings preg ment..child ment..

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Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852
unexpected feelings preg ment..child ment..

MC ment.....PG Ment..... Birth Ment.... Children Ment....

Dear Friends,
(Joy passed from this world in March)
As Joy's due date came and went. I celebrated my best friends baby shower. I did really good. Considering the Shower was the weekend I was due. We joined in the fun and then left a little early. ( Back in August) Today my BF is in labor with a wonderful little boy named Micheal Brice. I am watching her daughter. I am excited for her. I really am. I love her and her family. I have my own kids. Its not like I am alone. My grief has come up again. How do I go to the hospital and hold it together? Noone understands. I keep thinking Joy would be 7 weeks now. And I don't have her.
How could I be so selfish?
Thanks for listening.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I don't think you are being selfish. you lost your baby and still need to grieve.

Uropachild's picture
Joined: 08/09/05
Posts: 1176

You are NOT being selfish. In fact you are doing so well, especially to be able to go to a shower the weekend of your EDD!

These feelings have to be let out now and again otherwise it's not healthy. We can't keep things bottled up inside. I'm sure your friend will understand about your feelings and wouldnt blame you if you had a moment, even in the hospital.

You're so brave to even try. Not like me! I'm a complete coward. One of my friends has just had a baby and i really want to go see them so much, but i'm afraid i'll cry, so i dont go. I havent even spoke to her because it hurts.

You're not selfish. You're dealing with a lot right now. :comfort:

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I'm amazed at how much you have been able to do! and I'd suggest not pushing yourself too hard... it's ok to take a step back when you need to breathe!

shellyhudson's picture
Joined: 01/13/07
Posts: 814

that is so not selfish. that is a mother in anguish over the loss of her loved and wanted child. I have no advice as I don't know how I will handle that situation when it is time for my friend to have her baby. I wish you peace and strength.


Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

You are not selfish, you are still grieving. did you know it can take up to two years to grieve a loss of a child? Thinking about how old your little one would be is not selfish. You are allowing yourself to feel and that is healthy.

I hope you feel stronger soon

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852
Thank you

Thanks for the support. I have been to the hospital and I have held it together.
I have been do busy today!
That I believe is a good thing.