The meeting actually went a lot better than I expected. Having been in the military as long as I have I totally expected to show up and have these people listen and then just try to placate me. Surprisingly enough that is not what ended up happening. The meeting itself lasted for a full hour. To get that much time from Commanding Officer of any command is amazing in and of itself. We were able to say what was on our minds and to know that the highest possible person in the chain of command now has to put faces with this situation every time it comes up. We made sure to voice our concerns about how certain people handled themselves and how we felt that certain others need to learn to be more professional in their actions. I know that nothing will ever bring my precious angel back to me. However, I truly believe that there will be a radical change in the way that things are handled at this hospital. If even just one set of parents is saved from the pain and suffering that Dave and I have felt (and are feeling and will feel for the rest of our lives) then Damien's passing will not have been in vain. We have been promised that we are supposed to get a weekly update on the investigation that is currently underway even if it is nothing more than there is no change from last week. We have also been promised a copy of the autopsy report and that the CO and the CMC will look into if we are eligible for any kind of financial help to defray the cost of the cremation.
I still cried myself to sleep last night. Last night I just cried a little harder than the past few nights. I just have to wait until Frankie is in bed because she gets so upset seeing my sad and crying. I cried when I ordered Frankie's halloween costume for her because I had been looking forward to getting some sort of matching outfits for her and Damien. Now, that will never happen. I cannot even begin to imagine how I am going to deal with Christmas. Man this hurts. My heart will never be whole again. The worst part is that I want answers and I don't think that I will ever truly have them.
I guess that I will just take the small victories as I can get them. I just have to take it one minute to the next as it is too much to try and think about taking a whole day at a time. Thank you all once again for listening to me go on and on.