17 and pregnant in a small town...

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Joined: 04/09/03
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17 and pregnant in a small town...

Well to start off I'm not a slut. I knew all the risks of sex before, and protected myself. Obivously not enough because I got pregnant on the b/c pill Ortho Cyclin (sp). I took that damn pill faithfully everyday at 5:00 am, expect for one day in the summer when it was at 5:01 am. I have only had sex with one person and that is my boyfriend. We have been going out for a year we met Jan. 18, 2002. Things started getting weird when I didn't get my period in November. Which is weird because I am like clock work. I tried to pass it off as nothing, I kept trying to mentally think up excuses. I also tried to hide it from my boyfriend. It didn't work because supposedly I "act" different when I have my period than when I don't and he didn't by my little lie. He kept telling me to get tested because he thought I was pregnant. I'm stubborn, and I didn't listen to him. I got tested Dec. 4, 2002. That was the day I wanted to die. I went to the free clinic where I get my pills, and took the test I was hoping to get a -- reading, but instead it was ++. I kept saying you're test could be wrong. I saw a doctor, and they said I was pregnant, and then I said he could be wrong!! I was a little bit in denial. When I heard the heart beat I was 12 weeks pregnant. I was 8 weeks before I found out I was pregnant. I thought the heart beat was tumor with a heart beat... well now you know how smart I was. I just didn't want to believe that I could get pregnant. I wanted to die, I actually wanted to kill myself because then no one would know, and problem solved. It made sense to me then. I've improved since then. Well I'm a Junior in high school, so when people found out I got funny looks/stares whatever you call it. They all thought I was a slut. I got the rumors that I TRIED to get pregnant to keep my b/f. That came from my b/f's ex-girlfriend!!!! The girl who set us up together! She wanted to get pregnant, but that's another story... and a long one too! Or that I just wanted to get pregnant for the attention! YEAH RIGHT, everyone wants to be a slut? :? I never got pregnant to keep my b/f... and he knows that and so do most NORMAL people. Well anyway she just makes me :evil: !!! Now I'm 27 weeks and am having complications, it started at 26 wks. Well I have contractions without dialating. So I'm on a premature labor pill. I found out from a friend that she's spreading the rumor that I'm trying to flunk out!! I'm on pelvic rest, and my school doesn't want me back because they're scared to have me... HAHAHA it's actually kind of funny when you think about it because I am only 5'3 and they're scared of me... I'm on pelvic rest and can't do anything really. For fear I'll go into full fledged labor, but the contractions aren't much better! I'll have them for the next 3 months I'm due July 22. I'll update later... my life sucks now.