Mommy is in such a blah mood today!! Your father got one of those red light tickets in the mail yesterday and I called him about it before he got home, got mad and slammed the phone down. When he comes home your sister and I are playing with her box of barrettes as that is her fav wind down game and he dosen't come up there the whole time to say anything. Then I'm putting her in her crib and of course the protest comes and shes screaming her head off, when your father comes in her room yelling for her to be quiet and that it is time for bed. Now your momma has a bad temper when it comes to her babies and I don't take any b#$$s##t even from your daddy, so I jump on him with basically "you didn't come upstairs tell her that you were home or kiss her goodnight, but you come up here yelling like a damn fool so you need to just take your *** back downstairs were you came from" And of course cause your daddy doesn't fight with me, he goes downstairs. I didn't say anything to him after Madisyn was settled and I guess he brought me an ice tea cause I had told him I was thristy before the red light call, and the cup was basically full by the bed. He didn't say anything though, didn't say goodnight or love you. Then this morning he is gone to work and I didn't realize that he had got up until I hear the car cranking up outside, not even a goodbye or anything. Ohhhh well I guess he is entitled to not always take the high road when it comes to my BS and complaining so I will get over it and try not to still act mean and evil when he gets home. He's usually the one that apologize all the time, but I not today.
Mommy worries so much and that's what makes her a mean lady, for some reason stress=evil for me. Especially if things are out of my control and I have no immediate way of making it better. He brought me some perfume earlier that day, before all this crazy stuff happened and all I could say was I could have really used that money for bills. When your father had a better job he would give me a certain amount for BILLS every two weeks and that would be it outside of us maybe going out to dinner. Now that we don't have two pennys to rub together he has brought me flowers, still mananges to support everyones kids on their candy drives at work, and this damn perfume yesterday. I guess what really makes me mad is the fact that I asked him the day before do you have any money to go towards bills and he said no. So when I asked him yesterday about that he said well I didn't have any money when you asked. If I could have slapped him on that car show room I would have. So now I'm sitting here looking at this $40 perfume and thinking how that could have been two bags of diapers,or the majority of the cable bill, or the entire phone bill with change leftover.
Awwwww baby I know your thinking that I need to get a general journal or something instead of crowding up your space with this mess. I think I'm leaning more towards Dalayni now for a spelling if that is the name we are going to use. I wish we could set up a system of kick if you like this name or something
I just remembered that I didn't get to tell you that I saw a girl at the office the other day with her six month old baby girl. She use to come to use when she was preggo then kind of disappeard. She had her baby at the same birth center that we are going to and she said she really enjoyed it. She said she don't know what she would have done if she was at the hospital and did not have the mid-wives to help. She also said that she also didn't like Eileen and that she only had one visit with her because every time she would have it scheduled something would happen and the girl would have to cancel. She said she was so glad that she was not the one on call when her daughter was born.
The other cool part was that she is still exclusively breastfeeding and she gave me her number and the LC that helped her number.
I know there is something more I wanted to write but I can't think right now.
Today mommy got a baby name book, but I'm mad I didn't get the first one I picked up because it had the way you say the name and this one dosen't. I also got the Womanly Art of Breastfeeding book, a potty training book and a new book for Madisyn. She loves books so much, we can never leave a book store without something. I need to start taking her to the library because it would be so much cheaper.
I had a dream yesterday that I was breastfeeding a baby. It didn't seem like a newborn, but I really can't remember if it was you or what you looked like. Well here comes another Monday
I wish I could just be at home and enjoy this pregnancy and your sister instead of having to work.
24 weeks 4 days
Well the day has just really started so nothing to report baby, yesterday I had a horrible time finding a comfortable way to sleep. No matter how I adjusted myself something would start hurting after about a half an hour. I'm doing laundry now probably in another hour get ready to start at work. I usually do so much before I leave to go to work that by the time I have to start work at 2 I feel like just going home.
I don't want to get my hopes up but I am going to see if we could live off of 28-31G's on a starting correctional officers pay, I've been doing pretty good on my own and I know I don't make quite that much, but I also have to consider that soon there will be two little ones and not just one.
Ohhhhhhh baby if mommy could just figure out a way to be able to stay at home with the two of you she would be sooooo happy.
Time is flying little one! Only 106 days left to go. Yesterday wasn't too bad for a monday and tomorrow is mommies day off. I love having a day off during the week. I think that is the only way I can make
Tomorrow your grandfather and I are taking daddy around to all of the correctional facilities to fill out applications. I wish he was more excited about it, but I think he is in a what ever comes through first kinda mood.
Michelle who does message at the office told me to try sleeping with my back propped up almost like how a hospital bed is and that worked. No aches and pains today!!!
25 weeks 2 days
Sorry little one that I let a couple of days lapse. I'm now stuck on the name Brooklyn Paige. Your granddad likes the name but everyone else doesn't like it. I swear this morning I called you Brooklyn twice and you kicked me right away, when I called you Dalayni you didn't kick at all not until like two minutes later. Are you telling me something?
Mommy just got finish looking at About.com. I stayed on that site when I was preggo with your sister and this is the first time I have been on there since I've been preggo with you. It's odd that I never ran into Pregnancy.org with Madisyn because I was on the internet 24/7 looking a birth stories and that damn pregnancy calendar at parentsplace. I guess after going through it once the time goes by sooooo quickly and your not worried as much. You might get several little post like this today as I can't seem to remember everything I wanted to post today.
25 weeks 6 days
98 days to go baby!!!!!!!!!!!! Geez were does the time go. Your auntie Maria gave us her bassenet, but they smoke over there so it smells. Maira always keeps her door closed but you can tell when something has been in a smokers house when it comes into a non-smoking home. I swear it's smelling up the house just being here. The bad part is that the sides do not come off so I can't take the lining off and wash it in the machine. I had an offer of another one but they haven't come through yet so I will try to soak this one in some drift and wash it by hand. I need to get my infant carseat from that person too. I don't know why it hasn't been returned yet since her son has been out of that thing for almost a year. Your mommy never makes a fuss about things and she did give me a boat load of maturnity clothes so I guess I will just have to ask her about it. It probably just slipped her mind. I can't wait until your sisters big girl bed comes. She's starting to get really getting into this "mine" kick. When your daddy goes in to get her in the morning she says get off my crib papi. She is a trip! I think you too are going to have a good time together. She is a little on the sensitive side so be gentle my little lion.
Things I didn't get around to posting before
The saturaday before Mommy fell/slide down the steps. Your father was at work as usual and me and Madisyn decided to take a nap around about 4:30 since at 6 when he would normally get off he usually calls to see if we want anything that he can pick up on his way home. Well I wake up and it is 9 and no phone call from your father. I some kinda way move Madisyn of me and on to the bed without waking her up and get up to go downstairs. As soon as I turn the corner to go down the steps, I guess I slide on the carpet and do a little mini split and all of my weight lands on my knee. I finish hoping down the steps the and prop my leg up on Madisyn rocking horse. The funny thing is I'm not worried about the fact that I just fell, I'm worried about your big head daddy cause it's not like him to not call. I try all kinds of numbers and try the dealership but they were closed. Finally about 9:45 here he comes in the door. All I can do is start crying. He comes over and gives me a hug and says that he had a customer come in right before 6 and when he finally closed the deal with them he just jumped in the car figuring that he would be able to call from his cell phone but the batterey was dead. He asked me if I wanted to call the birth center, but I wasn't having any braxton hicks or cramps, just my knee hurt so I said no. I took a homeopathic arnica and that made it feel better. When I had it checked out I only over stretched my ligaments and brused my knee.
Had a visit with my natural path doctor. My blood sugar is very low and I had ate a snickers about an hour and a half before. He says I'm not eating properly and that it can make GD just as bad as a person who eats sugar all day. I need to get more green leafy veggies in my diet and step on the water because I'm taxing my kidney. He told me that my body was holding up pretty good inspite of myself though. He is going to check me on tomorrow (tuesday) to see if I have made any improvements which I haven't, so I will be yelled at.