I am surviving the week, and holding it together a little better, although with today being day #2 of no nap for DD, and having been up with some uncomfortable contractions (in my back) for several hours last night, I am starting to feel desperate about my need for sleep, or at least a little bit of restful, quiet time. I've found that when I start to feel like I'm going to go to pieces, listening to a hypnobabies track really helps me pull it back together.
So far this week I have met with my doula (last prenatal appointment- it was great!), babysat for my friend (for a total of 3 children under the age of three, for the whole day), gone to the dentist, and gone to my midwife appointment. I have gotten a few minor things done around the house as well. Tomorrow I need to go see my horse (not a good diagnosis from the vet- still upset about that).
I'm sorry I come off as being so negative in this journal. I'm really not a negative person, but right now I need a place to vent so that I can then go about my day and be cheerful with DD, and do what needs to be done.
I got thrown for a loop this morning when DH casually mentioned that he'll be traveling to another state tomorrow for work... he had forgotten to tell me! Not happy about that. It's not that I think I'll go into labor or anything, but I just don't like him being that far away when I've passed the 37 week point. Not to mention that it means I'm on my own with DD, and as much as I LOVE her, I just really need a break so that I can lie down for a little bit. It's just for one day, and if she'd napped yesterday and/or today I don't think I'd feel so desperate, but I was really counting on his help, and now he's not going to be here. If I had known ahead of time it would have been helpful, because I wouldn't have gotten my hopes up about getting a break. I think I'm going to have to get out of the house by myself sometime this weekend, just to regain a little sanity. I love my family so much, but I'm an introvert by nature, so sometimes I just need a little time to myself to feel refreshed and ready to go again. I shouldn't complain about DH, because he's really been SO helpful lately... I just wish he'd remembered to tell me about this trip a little sooner.
On a more positive note, I had a good appointment with my midwife today. I got to see my primary midwife, and I hadn't seen her in awhile (trying to make the rounds and get to meet the other midwives in the practice), so that was really nice. She's great! Weight was the same as last week, blood pressure was good, baby's heartbeat was good. She forgot to measure my belly, but since I've been right on every week, I don't think it matters. She said that baby's head felt nice and low in my pelvis- yay! Hopefully that means no more acrobatics! DD enjoyed getting to hear "Baby Brother's" heartbeat again- it was cute! I think she's starting to get excited... although who knows what her reaction will be when he actually arrives! Yesterday she told me that she wanted to hold Baby Brother. She got so excited when I told her that of course she'll be able to hold him when he comes out of my tummy. It was pretty cute. In spite of the no napping, she's been such a sweetheart lately. I'm trying to make the most of the last few weeks that it's just the two of us (during the day... obviously DH is also part of the family ).
Well, DH is on his way to Alabama, or maybe they're there by now. I forget what time they were leaving the office.
DD and I have had a good morning so far. She took a shower with me, which turned into a bath for her to play in after I was finished. She played in the water for an hour, and I had to convince her to get out because I could tell she was cold! While she played in the bath, I cleaned out and reorganized the linen closet, so I can check that off my list. Now if I can just get motivated to do some laundry, I can check that off my list as well! I have it all ready to go, just haven't thrown it in the machine yet.
I was planning to go see my horse first thing this morning, but since DD decided to take a long bath and I got started on my to-do list I changed my mind. We might go this afternoon since DH will be home late- it will help us pass the afternoon/evening until Daddy comes home. The weather is cooler today, so I don't mind going later.
I think today I'm torn between nesting and not having enough energy/feeling crappy. I've had a bunch of Braxton Hicks, and I just feel gross in general. So I have the motivation to get stuff done, but I'm having a hard time actually doing it! At least I'm slowly chipping away some things!
I'm having a crazy desire to hang pictures on the walls (we have some up, but since we just finished painting a bunch of rooms, there are still a lot to go). Problem is, I need DH for that. Maybe we'll make that the weekend project. I can do the smaller ones myself, but there are some large/heavy ones that require wall anchors/the drill/etc. and I'm not willing to attempt that on my own... not after we just paid to have everything professionally painted! Maybe I'll just work on figuring out where I want everything to go! That would probably be wiser .
Can I just say that I'm so thankful that DH helped me put my hypnobabies tracks on my new phone?! (I'm technically challenged... I needed assistance) It's SO nice to be able to lie in bed at night and listen to them!
What a night. I woke up at 12:30 with horrible indigestion/heartburn and it was all downhill from there. I STILL feel awful. I spent a large part of the night sitting on the couch reading a book because it was excruciating to lie down. When I finally went back to sleep, I had a nightmare. Ugh. So tired. This is why I won't miss being pregnant. I will still be exhausted, but I won't be physically miserable, and when I get the chance to sleep, I won't be kept up by stupid heartburn!
We got some rain this morning, which was definitely good, and saves me from having to water the garden! I have so many things I need/want to do today, but now I think I'd rather take a nap! I think I need to follow through with my plan to get out of the house by myself, though. I think it will do me good. I want to go see my horse and run a few other errands.
So one of my RL friends had her baby this past week, and another is due today. One of the girls from my birth board had her baby yesterday! Pretty crazy! I'm definitely at the point where I'm ready for this little guy to make his appearance. I know it will be hard- I don't expect life to be super easy once I'm not pregnant anymore... I have done this before and I remember what having a newborn is like . Not to mention the fact that it will permanently change our family dynamic, and that's a big adjustment for everyone. I remember telling my FIL when I was pregnant with DD, that being pregnant is hard, and having a newborn is also hard, and I was ready to trade the one kind of hard for the other. That pretty much sums it up!
I've posted on my birth board about how DH suddenly wants to change the name that we've chosen for the baby. This is REALLY not going over well with me- I'm very upset about it. Not a good thing to pull on a pregnant woman who is two weeks away from her due date! For now, I'm leaving the subject alone. If he wants another name, he's going to have to actually suggest something (what a concept).
Other than the name issue, the last few days have been really nice. Yesterday Catie and I went out to see my horse. He's doing a lot better (he's been lame... can't remember if I mentioned that or not) so that was a relief. Catie loves to brush him, so we enjoyed getting him all cleaned up. He was in a really sweet, snuggly mood. Today we've just been having a quiet morning at home. Last week was so busy that it was really nice to have a morning where we didn't have to be anywhere! I thought about going to the gym, but I decided to do that later in the week and just enjoy a little quiet. DD has been playing really nicely this morning. She's had a lot of fun with the dogs, so I actually got to sit and work on my knitting.
Well, I think it's time to put DD down for nap. My midwife appointment isn't until the end of the week this week, so no baby news... not that there's much even when I have an appointment. It's feeling like I'm going to be pregnant forever, but I'm okay with that for the moment .
I took DD to the zoo yesterday, where we met up with my friend and her kids. We didn't see many of the animals- just spent the time on the HUGE playground that they have. We're zoo members, so we can go as often as we want, which is nice because you don't feel like you have to see everything every time you go. We took the kids to the McDonald's play place afterward, then DD and I ran by Babies R' Us to pick up a couple more things that I needed (mostly hangers). I had a lot of BH in the afternoon/evening, probably because of the busy morning we had.
This morning I am feeling physically icky, but otherwise good. My lower back is still killing me (I think it's sciatica, definitely not a contraction-y feeling) and my belly feels like all of the ligaments holding it up have just given up. I've had some BH, but nothing in a pattern or that actually hurts. The baby is moving a lot better today. He was making me nervous the last couple of days, so I'm happy he's decided to let me know that he's still in there!
DH is working from home today, all day, which is kind of throwing me off. It's not unusual for him to work from home in the afternoons a few times a month, but he's not usually here all day. It's not that I don't want him here, it's just... weird! Well, I should go take a shower or do something productive!
Not much to report, other than lots of BH and one or two "real" contractions. Yesterday was a hard day for me. I'm feeling like I'm coming down with a cold or something, plus I was really hormonal and just got discouraged/impatient feeling like this baby is never going to come. Today I'm putting that out of my mind and going back to being patient! It would really be bad timing if he decided to come right now anyway. It's better to wait!
DD slept pretty badly last night. I had to get up with every two hours. I was pretty frustrated by the last time... I mean, she's almost 3, not a newborn for crying out loud! Oh well. She's always been a good sleeper, so I shouldn't get so frustrated with an occasional bad night. She's just seemed to have more than her fair share of them while I've been pregnant. But, better now than when the baby comes. Hopefully she'll have it out of her system by then! Plus when the baby comes, my mom will be here for a bit and will help out with her if she's up in the night/early morning. Then it will be DH's job . I am only dealing with one child at a time when it is the middle of the night!!!
I got the double batch of meatloaf made yesterday, and in the freezer! That's been hanging over my head, so it felt good to get it done. I don't know why I was procrastinating so much- it's easy to make and didn't take very long. Now I just have to make the pumpkin bread for my mom (I've tried to make a few dairy-free things to have in the house- she's allergic) and I'll be all set. I'd like to make another double batch of filling for shepherd's pie, at least one more lasagna, and a pound cake, but that would just be a bonus. As long as I get the pumpkin bread done, I'm good to go. It feels good to know that I won't have to think about cooking for awhile after the baby's born! When my mom is here she'll cook, when DH is off work he'll cook (he actually really enjoys to cook when he has time), some friends and possibly our church will bring us meals, and then we have the freezer stash! That's the one thing I wish I'd done when I had DD (freezer meals) but we didn't have the chest freezer at the time, so I didn't really have the space to do it. We got by okay, but I think this will definitely make life a lot easier!
I think I'm having a small burst of nesting energy today, which is great, since I have stuff I need to get done! I'm trying to do a little bit at a time so I don't totally wear myself out and then spend the rest of the day in bed . DH has been grocery shopping for me the last couple of weeks, which has been beyond wonderful! It was really sweet of him to volunteer to do it. I had mentioned that it was getting tougher to do with carrying the bags/getting DD in and out of the cart, etc. and he offered to take over! I wasn't really complaining about, because I actually like to grocery shop, I was just talking about how the belly was getting in the way! Lol! But since I usually do that on Mondays, it's been so great to have the extra time and not have to worry about it (DH does it Sundays).
I think I'm going to make the pumpkin bread today. I had DH go ahead and pick up the one ingredient I needed for the shepherd's pie filling, so I'm committed to getting that done this week as well. I'm excited since I managed to make a little more room in our chest freezer, so I can add a few more things. I just feel so much better knowing all those meals are in there.
Anyway, today I've been doing laundry, getting ready to pack (or at least start packing) DD's bag for when she goes to our friends' house while I'm in labor, as well as washing the last few things for the baby (carseat cover, pack n' play sheets that I just bought, etc.) I got the guest sheets washed, folded, and put in a place where my mom will be able to find them in case I'm still in the hospital when she gets here. I cleaned a spot on the carpet that had been driving me nuts for a couple of weeks (it's really small, and not a big deal, but I feel better having that done! Lol!)
We hung some more pictures on the walls yesterday, and I hope we can do a few more today. Almost makes it feel like we live here or something . Anyway, it feels good to make progress! DH made dinner last night (his homemade pizza, which is amazing) and cleaned the kitchen really well afterward while I was watching the kids (we were babysitting). I was totally dreading cleaning the kitchen, so that was wonderful! I'm not a big fan of cleaning kitchens in general, but I especially despise our kitchen. I had an absolutely beautiful kitchen at our old house, and I really, really miss it. Eventually our kitchen here will be great, but at the moment it is falling apart, vintage 1973, and I just hate spending time in it... which is a bummer, considering that I really love to cook and bake. When I get really annoyed with it, I just imagine what it will be like after we've renovated it. The rooms we've already done have turned out great, and we have big plans for the kitchen. Just a matter of saving up the cash to do it!
I glanced at my ticker a minute ago and realized that my due date is in 9 days... for some reason that just seems crazy! It still feels weeks away (and of course his actual birthday probably will be). I think that was the wake up call I needed to get a few more things done... like getting the carseat ready and installed!
DD and I went out to see my horse yesterday, which was a lot of fun. It wasn't too hot, and there was a nice breeze, so it was actually pleasant to be outside (rare for August around here). The baby decided to drop while we were there! I was super uncomfortable for the rest of the day, but I feel much better today, so I think my body made the adjustment.
Not much else to report. DH thought I was going to go into labor last night because of the baby dropping, but I'm just hoping that he'll come about a week from now!
Midwife appointment today. I'm expecting to be in and out pretty quickly. No cervical checks until next week (due date). Baby is moving well. I've tried to really watch my calorie intake this week, so hopefully my weight gain will be fine (it has been all along, but I get a little nervous about packing on the pounds at the end). Not much else going on... if there's any news from my appointment, I'll post it, but I really don't expect there to be.
Midwife appointment yesterday was good. I lost 1 1/2 lbs according to their scale. Blood pressure was 102/60 or something like that. Baby's heart rate was good, although a little on the low side of normal. We think he was napping, so she listened to it for awhile, but wasn't concerned. He's almost always on the low side of normal anyway- I think he's just a laid back baby. Goodness knows I could use one of those to balance out DD! Lol! She said that he's in the perfect position, so let's hope he stays there!
Not much else going on. Just trying to finish up odds and ends before he arrives. I need to remember to email my doula today with an update. Desperately trying to find some energy to get stuff done today. DD woke up crying at 6am this morning (she usually comes into our room all cheerful, so it was weird to find her in her bed crying). Don't know what that was about, but she seems fine now. But mommy is tired! I think I'm going to try to get some stuff done this morning, and then take it easy this afternoon, and maybe even try to nap when she does.
No news on the labor front- nothing happening, but I never expected to go before my due date anyway. I'm still really hoping for the first few days of September! Oh please oh please oh please!!!!
3 days until my due date! How crazy is that? One way or another, he will be here soon, even if he goes as late as he possibly can! Thank goodness- I am ready to be done! I want to meet my son, and I want my body back! I can't wait to get to know our family as "complete." I've always wondered, since I was a kid, what my life/family would be like... who would those people be? Meeting my husband was obviously one piece of that puzzle, and then DD came along. Then, we found out that our second child would be a boy. Slowly over the years pieces have been revealed. It's so crazy to think that sometime within the next two weeks (give or take a few days) I will have finally met my little family! That's pretty cool .
Baby did one heck of a crazy maneuver yesterday afternoon. It gave the most painful contraction I think I've ever had. I told DH it was the mother of all contractions. I think what happened was that he moved even lower. His little butt is really low down now. And even when he stretches out his feet and kicks, they don't come up anywhere near as high as they did.
We had dinner/game night with friends last night. That's always fun. It was a good distraction too, since I was pretty uncomfortable after Baby Boy's acrobatics. On Wednesday (my due date) we have DD's classroom visit at the preschool, then that evening I'm going out for dinner and pedicures with two of my best friends. Looking forward to that! DH keeps saying that he doesn't think I'll make it to Wednesday, but considering that he's been saying that for the last two weeks or so, I don't believe him . Plus I just don't feel like anything is going to happen before my due date. But I'm really hoping that something will right after! Lol!
I slept horribly last night. Really horribly. So this morning DH and DD went to church and I am once again playing hooky, enjoying the quiet and trying to rest a bit. I know there won't be much quiet in the near future!
My parents are getting hit with hurricane Irene today. I tried calling them earlier, not really expecting to be able to get through, and I couldn't. Hopefully their property comes through unscathed, since they're getting ready to sell it! I'm not too worried- they've been through plenty of hurricanes in the past. Just praying that they don't lose any trees, especially the ones that are right next to the house!