Hmm...So I'm starting this journal just a 'leeeedle' bit late. I am officially 18 weeks pregnant today! So happy birthday baby! Or not really birthday because you haven't been born yet, but happy conception day or something like that
So you're probably wondering? Why are you starting now? I DON'T KNOW! Don't ask a pregnant woman why she does anything! Because I feel like starting one now and I didn't feel like starting one before!! Grr. Don't get on my bad side
ANYWAYS... thinking about it, maybe I didn't start before because I just wasn't feeling good. So I'll go to the beginning of the story....
My husband and I met at University of South Florida. We were both involved in an organization on campus. He was the band's drummer, and I joined the band to sing and WAH LAH it was love. We dated for 2 &1/2 yrs and then we were engaged for 10 months and then we got married on May 11th 2002.
We had been planning on starting our family NEXT year, and I knew it could take awhile to re-regulate your body once coming off BC pills, so I stopped them in January of this yr (2004) and we were just being careful, and not BDing around that "you could get pregnant" time. SO...the month of May came around, and I'm checking the calendar to see what days we "weren't allowed" to do it, and our anniversary was scratched out. So I'm thinking...forget that!! We had a good old time that night, and just thought to ourselves...just one time won't hurt. Well to all you unmarried teens who want to have sex at a party! One time does the trick just fine!!!
Right around the time AF was due, I started getting really sleepy all the time and then I'd have to wake up in the middle of the night to eat. I just attributed it to stress. Then we went to the beach that weekend, and when we got home, I puked. So I'm thinking....do I have sun poisoning? Then I started having to pee a LOT! Do I have a UTI? Then AF was late!!! I was feeling crampy, so everytime I went to the bathroom....where is it? Did I leave a tampon in last month or something? Is it clogged up? It took me a while (2 weeks actually!) to realize I might have something else going on. So I bought a pregnancy test and took it! And it was positive! AAGGH! What did I do? I was so scared DH was going to be upset, that I waited until we got in bed that night and turned off all the lights because I didn't want to see his face if he was angry. "Umm..Nick?" "Yeah, Amy?" "I'm pregnant." Here I am waiting for the explosion. "REALLY?!?! How do you know? REALLY!?!" He was like a little kid all excited. What a relief.
THe next day was Sunday and we went and bought another HPT to make sure. Positive. I saved it for the baby book. We told his parents who were super excited, and Nick's brother and wife. She was pretty upset because (I didn't know at the time) but they had been TTC for awhile. It's all good though, because 2 months later, they finally did and she is due 2 months after me! YAY for cousins!
Then we went to tell my parents and grandparents and siblings. Of course they all started crying and freaking out because this is the 1st on my side. First grandkid. First niece or nephew. First great-grandkid. My mom is already thinking of what she wants the baby to call her. My dad wants to be called "pappy" Silly boy
Geeze...this story is getting long. Let me finish in the next post..
OK...back to the story. So 1st trimester was YUCK! I mean, first of all, I was so emotional b/c I was still a little freaked out about being pregnant. Of course I was excited, but we had these fun vacations all planned. We were going to Cedar Pointe, OH in Sept because I'm a rollercoaster-aholic and I've never been there! Then we were going to spend the weekend in New York in December and go shopping and see a Broadway show! Then we had this 4 week trip/cruise planned for Australia next year...and BAM! It's all out the window! So I was excited, but bummed at the same time. Plus I was feeling SOOOO sick. I was puking my guts out every day and trying to work at the same time. I'm a pharmacy technician, so I spend ALL DAY on my feet with grouchy customers. Not a good combo with a moody pregnant lady who doesn't even LOOK pregnant, so the customers just complaing about her because they think she's mean.
Sorry, I had to vent!
So 1st trimester was yuck. I mean...you don't look pregnant, and you definitely don't 'feel' good. I was not a happy camper.
BUT....WHEW! 2nd trimester came around and it started a whole new ballgame! BYe BYE M/S! BUt HELLO constipation!!
Bye Bye sore BBS. HELLO Itchy BBS!
THe best part of 2nd trimester so far was at about 16 weeks....UNEXPECTEDLY...I started to feel the baby move!! This is my first pregnancy, and my doctor even warned me that I probably wouldn't feel anything until about 20 weeks, but OH WELL! The baby knew that I needed some encouragement after that grueling 1st trimester!! So I'm sitting in church, right? Trying to listen, and "squirm, squirm.." it feels like snakes in my stomach. WHAT THE HECK IS THAT? And then, there it goes again. So I decided to try an experiment. I've read that the baby moves away from pressure on the uterus..SO I took the pen I was taking notes with (capped it of course) and poked my uterus with it. And then "wiggle wiggle". Sure enough! That baby was in there, and didn't like me poking it. My DH didn't like it either cause he told me to stop pestering the baby! Since then it's been smooth sailing. Go to next post and I'll let you know how I'm doing today!
Now that you're all up to date. Here's today. Actually, I'll start with last night. I'm lying in bed, doing my regular thing. (trying to get comfy). I finally figure out some weird way to lay with my belly by this gushy pillow. About to drift off into lala land, when "flick, flick, flick" from the inside! Hello? Baby? Is that you? "Flick" again! So we've made progress! It's no longer the squirmies! It must be a kick!! YAY baby! You're growing up so fast!!
Today at work was hard. I have to give props to all you women who are working full-time and will continue to do so until 9 months. Not me. I'm a wimp and I'm ducking out early. I've already cut down to 4 days a week, 6 hr shifts. I was running around the pharmacy like a crazy cow and my back was hurting so bad by the end. I just wanted to go home. Finally I did. Yay. As soon as I walked in the door, my psycho dogs jumped all over me and my DH went to bed. I felt lonely. But that's okay. He got up at 4:30 this morning for no reason at all. I think I wake him up a lot in the night when I go pee, because he has been having a hard time sleeping.
On the bright side... I leave for vacation to Michigan in 2 weeks! Sept 12th we'll be going up to Lansing area to visit DH's sister. She built a cabin on her land for us to stay in when we go, so it will be private. I'm excited about that! ALSO, September 10th (10 days) is our BIG ultrasound!! HOORAY! I can't wait to find out if we are having a boy or a girl! Blow some pink dust our way, because my DH and I are both hoping for a girl.
My belly is starting to poke out a lot more. I had some early maternity clothes that I borrowed from a friend, and they are getting pretty tight. I am going to have to break down and buy some bigger ones. It's kind of exciting though. I actually look pregnant now...instead of "is Amy gaining weight?" Sometimes...I want to wear a sign around my neck that says "NO! I'm not eating too much these days! I'm pregnant and I just don't look like it yet!"
So far..I've gained 10 lbs. My doctor says that's about average. I'm not happy. GRR. I want to be under-average. Less to lose when it's over right?
Ok..well TATA for now. I should write more regularly now that I'm not so sick feeling. Goodnite!
THANK GOD I'm off work tomorrow! Like I said before, I'm a wimp and I'm only working 4 days a week. Today was SO stinkin' hard again! My feet were killing me!!! I think it's because my feet are so little and they are having a hard time holding up the 10 extra pounds I've gained since I got 'impregnated' by that guy that sleeps in the bed next to me
SO..LIKE....I'm SOOO proud of myself. Today, for the first time since I found out I was pregnant, I EXERCISED! YAY for me! I have always been an avid jogger on my treadmill...I mean, I was never super duper muscle queen, but I exercised to stay in shape and healthy, cause if I didn't then I'd blow up like a balloon (I have one of those short and stout bodies that put on weight easily). SO...I've been feeling so out of shape recently and I came home from work today, and all I wanted to do was lay down and put my feet up. BUt I said NO!! And I hopped on my treadmill and power-walked for a half hour. I was quite winded at the end...but I feel so much better. So lets see if I can continue my 1 day streak tomorrow. I'll have the whole day to myself, and I don't even have any laundry to do. So I think I'll sit down and play video games all day Yes, I know...it's a very 'guy' thing to do, but for those of you who don't know me. My DH and I have kind of opposite roles. We even took an online "FRIENDS" test (BTW..I LOVE FRIENDS, hence my screen name), and my DH turned out having Monica's personality, and I have Chandler's. BUt at least we're still a match...however reversed the roles may be. Yeah, so he is very sensitive, and likes chick flicks and decorating, and likes to garden and make sure our outfits match when we go out. On the other hand..I rarely cry, I love action movies, rollercoasters, videogames, but the weird thing is...I'm not a tomboy. I suck at sports. And I don't like to watch them either.
Back to baby. I guess he/she is doing well. I haven't been sitting still all day, so I haven't really had a chance to feel the wiggles and flicks, but I'm sure they'll be there when I try to go to bed tonite.
My DH and I are talking about trading in our Explorer. Long story that goes with that....When we got married, I had a BEAUTIFUL BMW325i. My favorite car in the whole world. And then HE decided that we needed something bigger so we could tote around our 3 psycho dogs and his drumset. SO he traded in MYYYYYYYY car! I was bitter for a long time. BUT, the Explorer we got is a 2 door sport trac, and recently seen on the news as a very 'flippable' SUV. So...out of the blue tonite he asks if I'd ever want to get a BMW Sport Wagon. My first impulse would be to say...A STATION WAGON? ARE YOU KIDDING? BUt then we were looking at them online, and the interior is SOO nice, and quite roomy, and still room to tote his drumset to and fro. I know I won't get my 325 back for a while, since we'll need something bigger for our new "family". And it is a BMW (if you've never test driven one...they are AWESOME!) So..we'll see what happens with that. OK. I'll go for today! 9 more days till U/S!![/img]
Bleh. Bleh. Bleh. I can already feel the negative vibe entering this journal entry and I haven't even started yet. Why does everything have to GET ON MY NERVES? I know it's atrributed to the raging hormones coursing through my system, but does that help me or anyone else? NO!
Why do people have to procrastinate? And why are people so silly?!?! There's a hurricane coming..and it's going to hit the east coast of Florida tomorrow. THe problem is..I live on the WEST coast, and according to the forecast, we're just going to get the underside of the storm, which is the weakest point. Plus, by the time it reaches our coast, it's not even going to be a hurricane anymore!!! The most we are going to get is a bad thunderstorm!! We get those every afternoon in the summer, and people are FREAKING OUT! From the second I walked into work this morning, there are customers lined up in the store, in the drive-thru....EVERYWHERE! And they all want an extra months worth of their prescriptions because "there's a hurricane coming.." GRR. First of all, do you think the pharmacy is going to BLOW AWAY? Walgreens doesn't close for ANYTHING! We freaking don't even close on Christmas day...HOW DEPRESSING IS THAT? Do you think we're going to close for a THUNDERSTORM? I promise people..you will NOT be stuck without a Walgreens close by that you can go to for your meds!! PLUS..why are you waiting until the day BEFORE the hurricane to come here? You've had ALL week!!! You KNEW this was coming!! THen, all the customers are mad because we've got a 3 hr wait for prescriptions today. I WONDER WHY? The WHOLE ENTIRE WORLD is here!!
Ok...that's my VENT. Sorry if I scared you away. It just gets stressful. Don't you hate it when people don't understand your job. It's like they think they should tell you why and how you are doing it wrong, and they don't even understand how the system works! It's like I want to say...OKAY. If you are unhappy waiting for your prescription to be filled, feel FREE to jump behind this counter, and do my job, and see if you can get it done any quicker!!! OK...I promise that's the end of my vent. Bleh. Bleh. BLeh.
Off to happy land now!! (BTW for those of you who are wondering if I walked on my treadmill yesterday...I'm sorry to say...I'm a loser! I didn't walk on it today either, but believe me, I got my exercise at work today!) So, I'm not happy with the "squirms" anymore in my tummy, now that I've felt the flicks. Last night, I told the baby I wasn't going to sleep until I got a good kick, so I layed on my back and put both hands over my "pooch" and put a little pressure. Soon enough..right into my hand "Thump thump thump". Three good kicks! Then the baby moved down and started kicking into my crotch, and that was a WEIRD feeling. But I'm so excited that the baby is getting big. So far, the baby likes the left hand side of my uterus...so I'm thinking the placenta must be on the right or something.
I wonder what I should have for dinner? I've get chicken cacciatore leftovers, but I've been eating them for the past 3 days. I don't know if I can handle that AGAIN. Wish I had a better idea.
WHEW!!! The hurricane is OVER!! Thanks to Hurricane Frances, we now have waterfront property and lots of tree branches floating around in our new lake! Oh well! At least the water didn't get in our house! The people across the street are on lower ground than us, and they are totally flooded. The kids next door are riding around their yard in a canoe. It looks kinda fun But I'll not try it, since I've heard that there could be poop floating around in the water if the septic system overflowed or something. It was a LONG weekend. My parents and grandparents both had to evacuate to our house because they both live in mobile homes. So, we finally had our house to ourselves yesterday.
I was supposed to have a doctor's appointment today, but when I got to the office door, there was a sign posted saying that they were closed today because of the hurricane. My DH came to the appointment with me, so I met him outside to tell him that the office was closed. I don't know why it is, but men ALWAYS have to check things out for themselves!! Why don't they believe that a woman can be right? ANYWAYS..I was SO depressed because I have my BIG U/S scheduled for Friday, and if I didn't see the doctor, then I couldn't get my prescription for my ultrasound. So I was almost crying when DH and I went back inside the building. He saw that I was so upset, so he starts pounding on the door of the office. All of a sudden, the nurse comes and opens the door. I was so EMBARRASSED!!! Then DH steps back as if I had been the one pounding!! MEN!! So I sheepishly, with my head down, all sorry looking...asked the nurse "so I guess you're not seeing appointments today?" She looks at me like.."Hmm..is she serious?" Then of course, she was nice as could be and explained to me that their computers were down because of the hurricane so they couldn't schedule or access their schedules for the day and so they would be calling me to reschedule for next week. So, I ALMOST walked away, again dejected...but I thought I would try and see if my doctor was there. Luckily, she WAS!! I guess the doctors had to stay in the office in case people went into labor or something. She came to the door, and I humbly explained my situation and that I couldn't wait until next week because I needed my script today, and I would be on vacation next week. She was so nice, and explained that she couldn't reschedule my appointment yet, but she went ahead and gave me my prescription so I can still get my BIG U/S on Friday. YAY!
So anyways, I'm not depressed anymore, because my DH saved the day, by embarrassing me.
Last night, we were laying in bed, and I put DH's hand on my stomach and all of a sudden, the baby starts kicking like crazy. I couldn't believe that Nick couldn't feel it!! I bet he will be able to soon, because those kicks are getting stronger and stronger every week. As far as pregnancy goes...my face is BREAKING OUT!! My face hurts! Their not just like little pimples, their like big old honkin' infected white and green ones that HURT SO BAD!! I know that sounds gross. THEY ARE!!
I think that's about all that's on my mind right now. I'm just counting the days until my ultrasound (3 days) and my vacation (5 days).
I called my doctor this morning to see if I could reschedule my appointment. She said to call around 4 pm and I could probably be seen today...so I called at 4 and my doctor had been paged for a delivery. So I guess I'll try again tomorrow. How sad
Okay....WHAT IS UP WITH THESE HURRICANES?!!?! According to the hurricane track on the news, this new hurricane Ivan is going to hit us too!! DH says if the news is right, it's going to be a lot closer to home this time and he doesn't know if he wants to leave and go to Michigan if our house might get blown away. NOOOOOOO!!! I have been looking forward to this vacation. If our house is going to blow away, it's going to happen whether we are here or not, but he doesn't get it! I pray that it turns and doesn't come anywhere near us, so DH doesn't have to act like a hero and 'save' our house.
Also, DH and I had a discussion today about my work situation. I guess he JUST realized that Christmas does indeed exist this year. So he asks me..."how long are you planning on working Amy?" (In all honesty, we have discussed this before, and I was planning on quitting after I got back from Michigan)....BUT...after this nice, fruitful discussion, we have come to the conclusion that I need to try and work until I'm at least 7 months, unless the doctor says otherwise, so we'll have extra money for Christmas. SHEESH. That's fine with me...as long as I can cut down to 3 days a week, because I have so much 'nesting' that I want to do around the house and not enough time. I want to steam clean the carpets and tile the nursery and clean out the closets.....and so on...
So in the end, I guess we'll work things out as it comes.
So... it's off to bed for me Goodnite all you pregnancy journal reading people.[/i]
IT'S A GIRL!!!!!!! We found out about a week ago, but I've been on vacation so no computer access for me. We got to have an extra long ultrasound because first we had an intern do the exam, which counted as a test grade for her, then the real tech came in an did an official exam. When she asked us if we wanted to know, of course we were like "YES YES YES!" and she typed "I'm a girl" on the computer screen. I turned my head and told Nick it was a girl and he started crying. It was so emotional! I was so happy. So....little Natalia Jolie was named that day! We are so excited. She already has two outfits. One from my mom, and one from my Nana (grandma). Both are pink, and one came with a little beret. They are soooo cute!
Since then, I think I've grown quite a bit. I wish I had a digital camera so I could post pics online, but hopefully we'll be getting one for Christmas. I'll want to take lots of pictures of our little baby girl!
On vacation, we went to Michigan, and stayed with Nick's sister and our nieces. It's fun going there, but it's not exactly a vacation, because when you go to family's house you always feel obligated to help. So, it's not as relaxing as it should be. You know? I think the whole time we were there, I didn't ever get any alone time with Nick!! BUT.. on the upside, my sister-in-law did take me to get a pedicure, and I got my hair cut and styled and I got my very first massage ever!! But BOY was I sore the next day! I didn't want to tell DH that I was sore, because he paid 60 dollars for the massage, and what's the point of a massage if you're going to be sore from it? So...I just told him it was wonderful...which it was, until the next day!
The bad news is..when we got home, everything was so hectic. My Papa (grandpa) is in the hospital with some major heart problems. They are going to do surgery on him this week. They have to do 2 bypasses, put in a stint, shrink his atrium, repair two heart valves and put in the wiring for a pacemaker. THe surgeon says that the survival rate for all that surgery is not that great, but there is hope, so we are praying that everything will work out okay. My family is all very close to him, so it would be devastating if the surgery didn't work out.
When we got home from vacation on Saturday, our dogs officially became "outside dogs". It's kind of hard on me, because we have had them for over 3 years and they've always been very close and cuddly, but the house is a disaster! It is SOO hard to keep clean because they shed so much and they are always tracking in dirt and mud. Plus they are all three very BIG dogs, and I just don't want to have to deal with all that with a new baby. So, tomorrow I'm starting my deep cleaning of the house. I just feel so bad for the dogs. I hope they understand. Last night they barked and barked because we've never made them sleep outside. They usually sleep on our bed!! but not anymore! Poor doggies! I don't think they understand.
I'm down to 3 days a week with work now, which will give me more time to work on purifying this dog infested house before Natalia comes. It's also nice not to have to deal with everything I have to deal with at work every day.
I'm SOO excited because I get to see one of my high school best friends tomorrow. SHe is due a week after me, and I haven't seen her since we both found out we were pregnant!! I'm excited to compare bellies. PLUS, she has her BIG ultrasound tomorrow and is going to find out what she is having! YAY!!
OH YEAH! LAst thing. Nick finally felt Natalia kick. I was surprised because the doctor said he wouldn't feel anything until 26 weeks, but lo and behold, she kicked his hand the other night! HE said it felt like someone flicked the inside of his hand. Now, he likes to rub my belly every night to see if she'll do it again! How cute!!
PHEW!!! What a long week already and it's only Wednesday! So I started deep cleaning the house yesterday getting it all ready. I spent the whole day dusting (well half the day). DH made a list (he loves lists) of all the things we want to do to the house before Natalia comes. We figured out that if we deep-cleaned one room a week, then we'll be done with the house in about 6 weeks and we can spend the rest of the time working on Natalia's room. So yesterday morning, before work, NIck took all the furniture out of the living room, and I spent half the day taking stuff off the shelves and dusting. I tried to make it fun by pretending I was on that TLC show "Clean Sweep" and I filled 2 whole garbage bags full of stuff to throw away. I thought that Nick would be proud when he came home, because he is always saying that I clutter up the house too much, but instead, he wanted to go digging through the garbage to make sure that I didn't throw away anything that had sentimental value to him. So he ends up fishing out these two really ugly pirate ship hats that we wore to the Bucs Super Bowl Party. I'm thinking to myself...how much sentimental value do these have?? But I kept my mouth shut. I only told him that he wasn't allowed to put them on the fireplace mantel and he'd have to find a place for them in his office. They are so ugly!!!
After I finished dusting for the day, my high school friend Mindy came over!! She's so cute and pregnant. I feel like a fatso though. We have both gained 16 lbs since we've been pregnant, but she's still so small (everywhere but her belly) and I feel like I'm getting fat all over! She was a little disappointed because she found out she is having a boy and she really wanted a girl. But I think she'll find that she would never trade him for the world once he comes! We decided that we have already prearranged the marriages of our children. I took her to see my mom and brother and sisters, who she hasn't seen in about 8 yrs, and then she took me to see her mom. It was fun!! When I was at her mom's house it reminded me of all the sleepovers we had growing up!
So then, I went and picked up my sister from my mom's house and we went to the hospital to see Papa. He is in good spirits...he's just ready for the surgery. He doesn't want to stay in the hospital anymore. I can understand. He's been in there 8 days now, just waiting... As far as we know, the surgery will probably be tomorrow or Friday, so I am going to get ready and head up to the hospital before I go to work today because I want to spend as much time with him as I can.
As far as Natalia goes...she made me get up 4 times to pee last night!! Crazy child!! We're gonna have to do something about this!!
In the meantime, farewell and say a prayer for my Papa!
First let me aplogize for my emotional roller coaster. I'm so stressed out and I don't know how to handle myself. First of all, I really wanted to steam clean my carpets this morning, because it needs to be done, and if I'm doing that then I won't be thinking about my Papa. My grandparents have always been such a huge part of my life, and I don't know what I would do if Papa didn't make it through this surgery. well....the stupid steamcleaner isn't working. I actually borrowed it from Nana and Papa, and it's just upsetting me even more, because there is no reason for it not to be working, just like I don't see the reason why Papa has to be going through all of this.
The surgeon finally told us that his surgery is tomorrow morning, and now I'm so scared he's gonna die. I told my boss I wasn't coming in tomorrow, and he said the only way I can have tomorrow off is if I come into work today. So, I was going to go to the hospital after I got off work tonite, because I don't know if they will let us in to see him before his surgery tomorrow morning. Well, DH just called and asked me what I was doing. I told him I was going to go to the hospital after I got off work, and he said "NO!" What the heck? I asked him why and he said because I've been gone every night this week at the hospital. So I said back to him, "Listen...my Papa may not be alive at the end of this week, and I want to see him!!" and then of course like a stupid pregnant woman, I started crying. Dh tried to apologize, but I didn't want to hear it. So then he has the nerve to ask me why I'm bawling like a baby on the phone. So I screamed, "Because I don't want Papa to die!!!!" and then I think he felt bad because he told me to call him later and tell him what I was doing and then he got off the phone really quick. How come he can't just understand? He knows how close of a family we are. Just because he wasn't close to his grandparents doesn't mean that I have the same sort of relationship with mine.
I hope the baby is okay through all of this. I know that stress isn't good for her. And I really am trying to stay occupied until this whole crisis is over, for her sake, and for my own, because I won't stay sane if I sit and think about this all day long.
So anyways...if you are reading this post, please say a prayer for my Papa. I'm so worried about him. Thank you.