nerves...

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Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59
nerves...

Well I had the level II U/S and it was unbelievable! I don't even know where to begin. Put it this way I cried the whole entire time I was there. First of all it was throughly confusing because as soon as I arrived I was met by a genetic counselor who immediately started talking to me about all these genetic disorders. She did not build any rapport with me or show any humaness what so ever. I was completely innundated! She then sent me into the room for the u/s. From there she came into the room to come and get me and brought me into another room to discuss the findings. I mean this all happen soooo fast, you can imagine my nerves, and I 'm still crying!!
She says that they did not see the marker on the brain that was found the first time, but that doesn't matter, she says, because it was there for my initial u/s. I thought it was good thing but she got me right out of that thought. She then tells me that a there was a slight thikness behind the neck that was discovered during the initial u/s, but she couldn't check that because I was too far along to see that area on u/s. Now mind you I was never told about this "slight" thickness behind the neck from my doctor, but anyway. She then tells me that another marker was found, one that they did not expect to find. OOOhhh great i'm thinking! She says that the head is 1 week smaller than the rest of the body. This she says could be a number of different things. First she goes through all the worse case scenarios, and then she comes up for air and says that it cold be nothing.
It was mixed....whenever she said something bad she then would say that it could be nothing. I was on an emotional roller coaster. I didn't know what to think or do, I was screaming ay my husband, I was a mess. I think I went through every box of tissue that she gave me. So, I then had the opportunity to have an amnio. Because I am so far along I needed to know if anything was wrong with my baby.
I went for the amnio, which was nerve wracking, of course, but not painful. I'm still worrying 1day later if I'm o.k., hoping I don't miscarry. Now I am awaiting the results from FISH, which I am supposed to get tommorrow. I have been praying all day, I've had a constant headache and I chewed off all my nails. I am soooo nervous I can't help but have a million things run through my head. Mind you I am 31 with two healthy boys and no family history on either side of chromosomal abnomalities.
Meanwhile, I have done some research on the net and it is all reassurring, for what seems like my conditions. A lot of sites say those markers are not accurate reads. I hope that these sites are right for me. I pray and beg that Madison is born healthy and normal.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59
Results

O.k. so I got the results from the FISH and they came back normal. PHEW!!! I am really overjoyed. The only thing that keeps me from being estatic is that Lauren told me (my genetic counselor) that a little of my blood was taken along with the fluid from the my sac and that there is a small percentage of a chance that the results came from my chromosomes and not from Madison's. Can you believe it? But, nonetheless I am happy, because she said that it was most likely from Madison.
Now, I have to wait for the results from the full amnio results. Lauren did tell me that it is unlikely that they will be any differnet from the FISH results...let's hope...and pray.
Also, I need to still take the TORCH test, which is a test that will determine if I have an infection. They are giving me this test because the baby's head is a little small. It is in the 5% range. I am tring to be completely optimistic. The FISH test made me feel good because that was for major chromosomal abnormalities.
Please keep the prayers coming as I will especially to ST. Jude, who is the saint of hopelessness and to Saint Therese.

I will keep you posted. I have a OB appy. next Friday on the 3rd. of Feb. and there I will take the the TORCH and the results will take 10 days and right about that time I should get the results from the amnio.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59
Some uplifting news

I went to the doctors on Friday and explained to her what has been going on. She was in disbelief, and said that she doesn't understand where they were getting the measurement of the head being small. She asked me if I wanted to do an u/s there and I said ohh yeah. The head is smaller than the abdomin but nothing to be alarmed about because it is still measuring in the normal range. She said Madison was small to begin with. I still took the TORCH test because she said why not, just to cover all my options. I have the level II folow up in 2 weeks and they are just supposed to check the head size too see if it has grown or stayed the same. I still need prayers even though mu OB told me that the odds are my baby is going to be fine. I am still waiting for the amnio results to come back for the 2nd. part. and I need to call on Friday to find the TORCH results. I do feel a lot better after talking with my doctor and doing some research on the net. But, I continue to pray and be mindful of what is actually going on. She said it was all a numbers game that the genetic counselors play. Even if the baby's head were an inch smaller than expected it would plug into this figure which would make it seem like a problem. I am trying to be optimistic so I will wait patiently. Madison we love you and pray for you continously as we await the day we get to see you.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59
6 mos. already

Hello little Madison!

It is about 11:00 and I am home with your two older brothers. Michael Ryan is plaing Hary Potter in the living room and Nicholas is downstairs with PaPa.
I have been feeling so good about you. I feel lke you are really fine and that everyhing is going to be great. With the prayers that Mommy's been sending to God, Mother Mary, Saint Jude and Saint Therese and Grandma Colleen I know that everythig is going to work out.

I having been feeling you move a lot lately, and that makes me feel all the more better. I am still anxiously awaiting the phone to ring and it be Lauren, the genetic counselor, telling me that the second results from the amnio came back and that everything is normal. That would be the best news ever!!

Today is Tuesday and I have to it until Friay to call the OB and find out the TORCH results. I feel confident that those results will be normal as well. I still pray everyday that that will happen. I am nervous and scared! I really want everything to work out, because I don't know how I would make it if something were wrong. I don't want anyone one of my babies to have to suffer and endure pain and hardship, especially not my newborn baby.

Madison we are all going to be fine. We all love you and are praying for you to be born healthy and normal. Hang in there girl we have a few more months to go!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59
Feeling a lot better

Yesterday was Valentine's Day. Happy belated! I was home with the boys and they were happy. Daddy bought them a matching bear and some candy. It is funny because the bear was soo girly...but whatever.
I am very happy because I recieved the results from the second part of my amnio and the results were normal. I also recieved the TORCH results and those were normal as well. Thank-God!! See the power of pray does work. I am elated!!
I am feeling Madison move a lot more than I ever did. I was worried for a little while, just because of everything that was going on. But now I feel more than confidant that she is perfect. I am 25 weeks this week and I feel great. I am really excited about eveything. We are going to start on the nusery next week, when dh is on vacation.
I realy wish that Nicholas was potty trained. I tried. He goes on the potty every night before he goes in the bath tub. But when I try to put him on during the day it becomes a game. He is cleary not ready. I just wanted him to be all set with diapers before the new baby comes. He stills needs to get settled in a big boy bed in Michael Ryan's room. So many adjustments for my little Nicholas. It will all work out I know, but I want to get a move on things.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59
Emotional & anxious

Michael Ryan had his birthday on Sunday. It went really well. The kids all had a great time. He then slept over Michael's house that night and we picked him up after I went to Babies R Us to register. I was so exhausted last night. I tried to take advantage of only having one child with me so we tried to do many things...which left me sooo tired.
Today we are going to organize and get ready to paint. We want to get some things done while Mike's on vacation. I'm anxious and I feel overwhelmed. There is soooo much stuff that needs to be done. Lauren and Mikey are slepping over tomorrow night. More work, but I did promise. Well right now I need to go and make luch for the boys. They want ham and cheese sadwiches. I can't wait for nap time!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59
Mood swings!!

Hello Madison!
Today was a good day for me. I had a mani./pedi. and had my eyebrows done. In other words I had some me time. But the odd thing is that I was in a bad mood early on in the evening. So much that I brought myself to cry. Over the stupiest thing ever, of course. Your father was going to see your Vavo in the hospital, and I flipped out because I did not want to be alone. Mommy has been soo tired, and your brothers are soo active I just want some help....all the time. Now I know that that is unrealistic and that is why it is so silly for me to be having these flipping mood swings. But I love you, and I can't wait for the day I get to meet you and see your face and touch your warm skin. On Wenesday I have a drs. appt., I actually look forward to these appts., so I can hear your heartbeat and know that you are doing just fine. Well, right now I need to go and shut off your brother's light and kiss him goodnight.
Bye for now!!!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59
sweet dreams...

I had a beautiful dream of Madison the other night. I was holding her and looking at her, sizing her up from head to toe. She was a bit of a baldy bean. She had light skin with beautiful long eye lashes. I remember commenting in my dream that her eyes were light, but I don't remember actually seeing them. I also remember that she was longer, and bigger than I thought. It was amazing!!
Things have been going really well. I love feeling her move inside me, it seemed like last night she was up the whole night. Everytime I got up she would kick me or something to let me know that she too was up. I am 27 weeks this week. I can't wait, one more week to 8 mos.
We are going to paint her room in lavendar and pink. Big stripes. I want lavandar to be the flat color and a shiny pink. White, light curtains and a white borber with a white rocking chair. I have a plan I just need to execute it.
We ordered the bunk beds for the boys. They shoud be in in a few weeks. That is going to interesting putting Nicholas in a big boy bed. Well, I guess one needs to start sometime. We asked Holly and Michael to be the Godparents. It's funny because Holly booked the babyshower like that day. She is really excited, as we are. WellI am hungry, I am going to make a toaster strudel. I love those things, but can only eat them say when I'm pregnant.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59
27 weeks

Today I had a drs. appt.. Everyting went well. I gained 7 pds., that's right...7 pds.. Next month will be my last of the four week appts. and then I go every other week. I need to go Friday for my glucose screening. I could of had it done today, but I didn't feel comfortable having Nicholas wait a whole hour with me.

I feel energetic and like I don't want to sleep anymore, but just lie down and close my eyes. It's weird because I love to sleep. Nicholas has been getting up at 6:30, and I get up no problem. I like it. It would be great if I could continue with this energy, and the need to not lay in bed until I absolutely have to get up.

The babies hb was at 150. Pretty consistent with what it has been for all my check-ups.
Nicholas is napping so I will take advantage and at least try to see if I can sleep. I already cleaned up th house while he was downstairs with Papa.

So I am going, I am happy and feel great. I'm so glad I am able to enjoy my pregnancy now!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59
Feeling scared

O.k so I have been feeling great as far as pregnancy is concerned. No heartburn,or heavy aches. But my concern is more mental. I feel real aniexty over the health of my baby. Today we were at a b-day party for one of Michael Ryan's friends. I met a women who had a baby in a carriage. She was talking to me about my pregnancy and asking me how old Nicholas was. I told her and then I naturally asked how old her baby was. She told me that her son was born with problems unbenouned to her. He had webbed fingers and an extra digit. She told me she had no idea. This frightens me! I think about my Madison and wonder if she is o.k.. After all the scares I have had with her, I am so worried. Just when I thought I was o.k., I'm not. Lord please help me to be strong, and please help Madison to be healthy. I'm going to search the web for webbing and see if it can be detected before birth.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59
Tired and hungry

O.k so I did a two search on the web and found that an extra digit could be detected on a sonogram and is most likely part of a disorder which includes other problems. Why would that women make me feel so uncomfortable?
We went over Michael's house for dinner last night. It was yummy as always. Holly tells me that my dear Aunt Linda was questioning why I was having a third shower. I knew it would come from one of my aunt's. Holly simply told her that I have two boys and that I don't have any girl things. My scong shower for Nicholas was not needed, nor was I expecting, it was a surprise. But oh well. I do need this shower and I don't need my meddling, negative aunt to tell me otherwise. I need to call the doctor for Michael Ryan. He has been having problems with his eyes. He is contantly getting red, pink eyes. So I need a referral for an eye doctor. I need to get my boy checked out, hopefully there is nothing wrong, maybe he is just prone to getting pink eye. I hope that is all it is.
So, I am still feeling great. I mean I an't stand up for too long, or I get a little lite headed. But I really do feel physically fine.
You what does make me a little uneasy. And I know I am a big worry wart nowadays, but lately a lot of people have been telling me that I am small for being 7 mos. preggo. It is different people at diferent times and I never had this said to me for my other pregnancies. I am gaining a ton a weight, too much. No really last month

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59
Tired and hungry

O.k so I did a two search on the web and found that an extra digit could be detected on a sonogram and is most likely part of a disorder which includes other problems. Why would that women make me feel so uncomfortable?
We went over Michael's house for dinner last night. It was yummy as always. Holly tells me that my dear Aunt Linda was questioning why I was having a third shower. I knew it would come from one of my aunt's. Holly simply told her that I have two boys and that I don't have any girl things. My scong shower for Nicholas was not needed, nor was I expecting, it was a surprise. But oh well. I do need this shower and I don't need my meddling, negative aunt to tell me otherwise. I need to call the doctor for Michael Ryan. He has been having problems with his eyes. He is contantly getting red, pink eyes. So I need a referral for an eye doctor. I need to get my boy checked out, hopefully there is nothing wrong, maybe he is just prone to getting pink eye. I hope that is all it is.
So, I am still feeling great. I mean I an't stand up for too long, or I get a little lite headed. But I really do feel physically fine.
You what does make me a little uneasy. And I know I am a big worry wart nowadays, but lately a lot of people have been telling me that I am small for being 7 mos. preggo. It is different people at diferent times and I never had this said to me for my other pregnancies. I am gaining a ton a weight, too much. No really last month I gained 7 pounds. I am going to ask my doctor when I see her next month if everything is o.k. She has neer mentioned anything like the baby wasn't growing appopriately. But know I can't help but to worry. I hate worrying soooo much.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59
not feeling too well today

Hello,
today I am feeling a little under the weather. My throat is sore and I have a stuffy nose, and my body is achy. I wish I could just lie in bed all day. I have the curtain lady coming over from JCPenny today. In fact she should be here any minute. She is going to measure the french doors in the kids rooms as well as the window in Michael Ryan's room. I really want to get those curtains hung. Yesterday my OB's office called me to let me know I have low blood, so I need to start taking iron pills at night. If I remember correctly I had to do that for both of my other pregnancies as well. No big deal!
I baby sat Luca yesterday. It was fun. I had three children. So it was good practice for me. Lunch time was a fun act, as well as nap time. But I managed.
As soon as NIcholas goes down for a nap today I need a shower in the worst way. I feel soooo nasty. I want to scrub clean and then take a nice long nap. Well as long of nap as Nicholas takes, usually 2 hours sometimes even 3.
Well Nicholas wants popcorn so I need to go and get it for him.
29 weeks here I come!!!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

Can you believe that i'm still sick? I have gotten worse. I feel like it is a head cold because everything that hurts is located above my shoulders. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day, or should I say a better night. I am anxious about my check-up in two weeks. I wish I was going every week, just so I can make sure all is well with Madison. Am I drinking enough water, eating enough of the right kinds of foods...all these questions I ask myself. It is tough being pregnant. You don't have full insight as too what is going on. Right now I think she has the hiccups because every second or so my stomach gets a little nudge in the same spot. although it is gone now, so who knows??
I am home with Michael Ryan and Nicholas today. I am making chicken cutlets for dinner. I wish I had potatoes to mash em'...maybe Manny has some.
Well I got to go and check on the boys it is somewhat quiet in there, I want to go and investigate...quietly.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

29 weeks!!!
I'm still sick with no signs of this letting up. Last night I took two xs tylenol and slept pretty good. I have the worst time trying to sleep. I just cannot get comfortable. The doctor said I can take sudafed but really I would rather deal with this...I'm just not much for med's.

Today is Christopher's b-day party. Honestly I don't feel like going anywhere. But I have too. My dh said he would take the day out of class to go with me. How would I manage chasing Nicholas around and trying to keep up with Michael Ryan, all while I'm just not up to par??

I can't taste any food, but does that stop me from eating....NO! Michael Ryan is in school today. Mike will pick him up early, come home and then we will all head down to USA Skates. Yay!! Sad .

Well I need to go and blow my nose, drink some water and get a snack for Nicholas and myself. We will share a strudel. Yum!!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

What a crazy week-end! I am soo emotional, I just can't help it. My son, Michael Ryan stayed home from pre-school on Friday because he was complaining of the same types of things I have been complaining about. I took him to the drs. and found out he has scarlet fever! Which is basically exactly what I thought it was. I went online and tried to find out what was wrong with him before I went to the drs. I was right!! Anyway I also went to my drs. becuase I was still sick on Friday. I took a strep test the short one that gives results imediately. No strep. I am confused!! I am better today, but this is the first day that I feel almost like my healthy self again. I usually never get sick, and especially for the amount of time I was sick....over a week! Today I should get the results for the full strep test.

Madison has been really moving lately. I don't know if it is because I have been drinking tons of water so I didn't get dehydrated. But if that was the reason she has been moving so much then I will continue to drink tons of water, because I love love love feeling and seeing her move! It makes me so happy!!

I will be 30 weeks tomorrow....so I'm excited! I have a drs. appt. next week. And then I start to go every two weeks.

I do feel overwhelmed every now and then. Thinking about having 3 kids scares me sometimes. Nicholas is sooo needy right now, it will be hot summer time, and Michael Ryan is going to want to be doing different things. How am I going to keep up. I will need to keep Madison in for a little while...no direct sun. I am going to want to be outside because inside I will go nuts with three little ones. Mike will be working a lot of the times. I don't know! I guess i know I will manage, but the thought of it makes me a little nervous. I want o be a good mommy, but sometimes I feel like I'm not good enough. I should and could be better. I hope the Lord gives me the strength to be as good and as efficient and still stay sane as I can be. I think I can..I think I can.. I think I can.

O.k so I am going now.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

I tried to post earlier today but for some reason my password was invalid so I had to make a new one.

I had a dream of Madison last night. It was a result of me being paranoid. I haven't felt her move around as hard as I have been so I was worrying. My dream was me going to the doctors for a check-up. They found her heartbeat and then wanted to check on the u/s if everything was ok. I saw her. She had dark brown hair past her ears and bangs. Very stylish! The reason I wasn't feeling her as rigourous as before was because in my dream she was snuggling up to my placenta. Weird i know but comical. It was just nice to see her and know that my dreams are there to let me know that all is fine.

10 weeks left to go. I can't believe it! I'm happy, but I have not one thing done for her room. And I have soooo much to do. My dh says he is waiting for me to clean out the room. How can I clean out the room when I have all Nicholas' belongings still in there. We really can't do anything until the bunk beds come in, which should be any day now. All the work that needs to be done is soooo daunting. I know it will get done. I am one of the people that definately works better under pressure.

It is our 3 year anniversary today. It seems like we have been married so much longer than that. We will celebrate Saturday night with my brother and sil at Cappriccio's. Mike is in the bathroom right now with Nicholas giving him a bath. That is his job when he comes home. I have Nicholas all day, and as soon as dh comes home he is all his. Mom neds a break every now and then too. Mchael Ryan is so easy at this age.. he is no trouble. He just constantly nags for the computer, as he is doing right now. I will let him use it.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

I fell asleep last night worrying again. I wish I didn't do this so often. I can't help it. After all the different scares I have had throughour this pregnancy I just can't help it. I worry if the baby is moving around enough, if she is growing the was she should be, am I big enough(which with all the weight I've gained I'm sure I am). I really want another u/s. I want to see her and make sure that she is o.k.. I fel like a paranoid crazy lady. I rationlize by telling myself that I'm just excesively worrying because of all that has happen. I have less than 10 weeks left and she will be here before you know it. What I really should be worrying about is getting her room organzied.

I feel like she is completely on my left side. My left side comes out more than my right. But yet I feel her move on both sides. Maybe just her bigger parts are on my right.

It's funny being pregnant. It sems like all you do is eat sleep and think about your baby.

I feel good today. Nicholas is downstairs with my fil. I am fixing a chicken sandwich in the midst of posting this entry. Hold on... o.k. I got my sandwich. So I need to eat it and then grab Nicholas and put him down for a nap, and hopefully I can nap myself!!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

So I still feel great! No problems at all....thankfully. I am slepping well, I don't feel the need to use the bathroom in the middle of the night, yet. I am still very emotional, but I can live with it. I have a drs. apt. this Friday. Can't wait to hear how the baby is doing and growing.

I started the Little Gym with Nicholas this morning. He absolutely loved it. Mostly all boys in his class. I think I will enjoy the month going there with him, before Madison is born. I am going to miss Nicholas being my baby. He is sleeping right now. We got home, I gave him lunch and put him right down. I am going to miss that as well. Those days will be long gone I am sure once he moves into a big boy bed.

Well I am going to go and try to catch a little snooze myself!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

So I still feel great! No problems at all....thankfully. I am slepping well, I don't feel the need to use the bathroom in the middle of the night, yet. I am still very emotional, but I can live with it. I have a drs. apt. this Friday. Can't wait to hear how the baby is doing and growing.

I started the Little Gym with Nicholas this morning. He absolutely loved it. Mostly all boys in his class. I think I will enjoy the month going there with him, before Madison is born. I am going to miss Nicholas being my baby. He is sleeping right now. We got home, I gave him lunch and put him right down. I am going to miss that as well. Those days will be long gone I am sure once he moves into a big boy bed.

Well I am going to go and try to catch a little snooze myself!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

oops!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

oops again!!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

In the mornings, usually every morning if I am on my feet too much I begin to feel light-headed, and I feel the need to sit or lie down. I have been taking the anemic pills, figuring my blood is lower in the morning, but it doesn't help. Also lately I have been waking up extremely dry and thirsty. I try to stay well hydrated throughout the day, but who knows.

Madison today or rather first thing this morning seemed to me to shift from my left side to my right. I usually feel her big movements on the left but this morning and now I feel those movements on my right. I sure hope she is cozy in there.

31 weeks tomorrow... yeah another week closer to meeting my baby!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

I am eating Girl Scout Cookie Mint choch. chip ice cream right now! It is sooo hitting the spot right now. Nicholas is napping..we got back from the little Gym a little bit ago. It is so fun to see him having a blast. He really enjoys himself. I am so glad I decided to join...it was a liitle expensive, which my husband had a wee bit of a problem with at first, but I don't care. Nicholas is soo worth it.

There is nothing as cute as when Nicholas talks to Madison. He tells me I want to talk to Madison, and the lifts my shirt and in his sweetest little voice he says hi Madison and rubs my belly. It is absolutely edible. He just started dong this after watching Michael Ryan do it for all the time. It make me soo emotional....it that's damn cute!

I went in for my appt. on Friday. The last of my monthly. She is head down and the fundal height was fine. I gained 5 lbs. All went well except the fact that I disliked my Doctor. She was on th rotation and I usually try to avoid her, but I Figure I might end up with her in the delivery room so I should give her another chance to redeem herself. Well, we did not click, yet again. She is very young, probably the youngest in the practice, and she is new. I do have a hard time adjusting to new people only because I love all the other doctors, and it is a little scary meeting a new one because you never know she could be full herself as well as rude.
So, I was having a pretty anxious morning. My appt. was at 9:15. I got up earlier than I usually do in order to feed the kids get them dressed and drive Mike to work all before 7:30. So I was rushing around and got extremely dizzy while driving the car. I had to literally pull over and take some deep breaths while closing my eyes. Mind you, Mike is yelling at me telling me he is going to be late for work to move out of the way so he cold drive. I could not move for at least a minute or two. After mumbling a few impolite words his way I moved. He stopped and got me a water, because at that point I think he could tell I wasn't joking. He then pulled to the side of the road let himself out and I just sat there with the kids in the back asking me questions and tried to breathe slowly and calmly before taking hold of the wheel again. So I then dropped Michael Ryan off and headed to my appt. I am feeling a lot better at this point, just still a little shaken up about what happen. I get Nicholas in the stroller and head to the waiting area. They call my name and I go, and I sit and wait for the Dr. to come in. In she comes, you should of seen my face. She's like we've met before...I was like yea. Anyway I was asking a lot of questions because I felt emotional and still a little uneasy. She tells me in a very condescending tone of voice. I don't undestand why your so emotional, there is no need for it, you are fine. Well, with that I grabbed my stuff and pretty much ended the visit, and I hope I sent a loud message. I will avoid her like the plague from now on! Don't like her once, don't her twice...no more chances. I don't like her!!!

So anyways....I needed to vent that out. I have another appt. in 2 weeks, with someone I do like, and hopefully all goes well.

Lower back pain, major, major pelvic pain, leg cramps at night, and the inability to move after sitting for any given amt. of time are all the things I am suffering from at this point in my pregnancy.

Aside from that no heart burn and no constipation, so yahoo for that!

I am going to rest a bit before Nicholas wakes up.

Oh, and by the way it is gorgeous outside...I love it!!!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

I slept lakie a baby last night, in fact I woke up tp Nicholas calling for me. I usually am awake before him. I did have a long day yesterday. I wentto my sister's house and we took the babies out for breakfast and then walked around Babies R Us. I showed my sister all the things on my registry. Looking over it again there are things that I want to change, but we will see. Later that day My husband and I along with Nicholas went to Burlington Coat Factory before we had to pick Michael Ryan up from school. Too my surprise they had cuter things in there then Babies R Us. I may start a registry there online sometime today.

So I am feeling good, no real complaints this pregnancy despite all the concerns is going relatively good. The kids are downstairs watching Zathura, for like the hundreth time, what is weird is that I think Nicholas is into it more than Michael Ryan. Hey, whatever keeps them quiet and calm.

I need to go and blow my nose and then lay down for a bit before the kids come back up!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

I had an awful week-end! I fought with my dh the whole time from Friday night to Sunday afternoon. It was a nightmare. I was supposed to go to a get- to- gether 10 mins. from my house at 7:00. My dh was not only late to come home, but he shows up with no car!!! I mean come on- how do you forget the car? This is what he told me....imagine!! He told me becuase I was rushing him he just forgot to get the car and drove home with his father instead. So needless to say I was pissed. I mean I never go anywhere, and I really felt like he did it on purpose. So I was a maniac toward him, I mean I said awful things! So anyway after him taking my verbal abuse for awhile he gave me the silent treatment and his father treated me like shit on Mike's behalf....but that's another story for another time. Mike called me Sunday morning...he was at the Mayor's breakfast, and told me he loved me and did not want to fight. So he came for me and we went shopping. I knew I had him when he called me to reconcile. I know, I am bad, always thinking about shopping. But what ever works, and I got everyting I needed w/o hestitation!!
Don't you just love making -up??

So now that I am feeling better I can talk about the fact that I am almost 33 weeks and my drs. appt. is 2 days away. I feel great! The baby seems sooo big inside me, she feels like she is everywhere. I am so excited I am getting close!!!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

My Dh's uncle passed over a couple of days ago, so today we attended the brunch together with the kids. Last night was the wake. My dh was a pall bearer. I could not wait to get out of the house today. I do usually get like this whenever the weather starts to break. I never want to be home. I want to be out enjoying the sunshine, hearing the birds chirp, and the soft wind blowing toward me. It makes feel really good and plus you have to remember I have double the itch now because I am in the house sooooo much with the kids.

Yesterday I went and looked at baptismal outfits for Madison. My dh was getting a haircut and so I strolled Nicholas to this boutique where I bought Nicholas' baptismal outfit from. I found one I loved, of course I was just killing some time so I did not purchase anything. At least I know what I want when it is time. The girl outfits are so much more expensive than the boy outfits. Almost $300.oo for the dress and bonnet.

I am so excited that I am having a girl. I cannot wait to give birth.
It will be a lot of work with the three, but I am in love with my Madison already and cannot wait for her to meet her brothers.

I am making pork chops tonight. It is about 5:30 right now and still seems so early, so I will begin cooking around 6:00.

33 weeks tomorrow!!!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

My dh ran over is foot with the lawn mower on the eve of Easter. We were all in the car geting ready to do some errands, when his father asked him to trim the areas that the tractor could not get. He was rushing and obviously not paying attenton. I heard the horrific soung of something being caught in a mower and then.....the screaming. It was completely crazy.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

I haven't updated much because my dh has been out of work for spring vacation, and if it weren't for that he'd be out on injury. So, needless to say I have been taking are of him around the clock, as well as, my kids.
Madison's room was started over this past week. Mike had the art teacher come in for $25 an hour. I thought it was a little much, but oh well, it is almost done now. I painted the room a creamy purple, which looks like a soft pink, and then we put a darker, shiny stripe all the way around 6" apart. It looks really pretty. I was quite impressed. So, now of course I want to change my bedding and luckily I didn't hang the curtains yet because I have changed my mind on the original ones I wanted. So, we are supposed to go to Pottery Barn for Kids today. I love that store, and we will be getting a lot of things for our kids rooms from there. Nicholas' bed is supposed to be coming in today. Well a loaner twin bed, because the bunk beds will not be in until June, so dh's cousin said we can borrow a twin bed aquipped with matteress until then. I thought that was nice of him. So, things have been gettig done aroud here despite Mike's injury. It has actually been nice having him home. I don't get to see him much during the week when he works. By the time he comes home I'm too physically exhausted to appeciate him.
I went and got my haircut yeasterday. I chopped it off. I also got my eyebrows done, bought a new lipstick (impulse buy), I hate it! and then went to lunch all by myself. It was really nice. I put Nicholas down for a nap before I left and Michael Ryan was in school, so it really wasn't a big deal for Mike to stay home on crutches with Nicholas.
My shower is tomorrow! I will drop Mike and the kids off at my brothers and Melissa will pick me up from there. My brother will pick up the slack from Mike because he knows I need help and that is just the type of person he is. Both my brothers are so helpful and caring. I seriously could not have asked for better ones.
Well, I am going to watch some cartoons with Nicholas for a little while. Michael Ryan and dh are still sleeping and the painter is coming at 8:00 a.m. so I need to get going.
Oh by the way, I still feel great! Madison is always moving...it seems. It is funny as soon as I eat, no sooner I put the fork in my mouth and swallow she is moving away. She must be a hungry girl, or she just loves food like her momma.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

I haven't posted in a while...it has been hard having my dh home with a busted up right foot. But, I do have lots to report.
Nicholas is sleeping in a twin bed, even as we speak. I put him it for the first time last friday night. I bundled up all kinds of blankets and pillows on the flor next to him, in case he fell off. I was totally expecting him too, because Michael Ryan fell off all the time. But not Nicholas, he is a trooper. He is a more restful sleeper than his brother, and now he is napping there. He doesn't climb out, he doesn't fuss, in fact I think he likes it better. I am a very happy mommy.

Madison's room is coming along great! It will be finished up by this Saturday. It looks beautiful already. Pink walls with shiny slivery strips. Then we had all the woodwork painted white. I am so excited!!!

I had my shower on Sunday. It was really nice, everyone showed. It was very quaint...about 20 people...some family and close friends. I just wanted people there who loved me and were happy for me and my growing family. I thank my brother and Holly sooo much for throwing the shower for me. It was really nice of them. Not having my mother here for these big events is not right, and they just tried to make it a little easier on me. Thank-you, thank-you!!!

Michael Ryan is doing great too. Can't leave here without mentioning my biggest boy. He is awesome! He is sooo big, Friday he goes for his yearly check-up.

Tomorrow is my 35 week appointment. I am anxious....as usual.
I am getting more and more anxious as the weeks go by. I want to meet and hold her and be her mom. But I can't help but to worry about her. Is she o.k.?, Is she healthy, will she be healthy? I am praying, and I do believe she is. I need to keep the faith and be optimistic. I want my baby girl so badly, I never wanted something sooo much as to have this third child and welcome a baby girl into this family. She needs to whip all these boys into shape!!

I have to go now, and wrap my dh's foot up so he can shower. Tootels!!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

I went to my drs. appt. today. I gained 3 pds. in 2 weeks. I have been gaining consistently. I did not get a reading on the hb because the doppler she had did not give a reading, but she said based on the fact that she was kicking while she was trying to get a reading she was healthy. She also gave me an internal because I told her that I felt a lot of pressure in my lower abdomen. She said I was tightly closed and although the baby was right in position she was still far away. So that was good to hear. She told me I was measuring a week behind at 34 weeks. She followed up by saying better to be a week behind than a week ahead. So all in all a good appt., I go week to week now.

I have to go right now, Nicholas wants to get out of the tub!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

My Dh has finially returnd to work today. I am happy about that because now I can get on with my schedule as usual. The dr. said that he will remain in a special shoe and not be able to walk again, the way we are all accustomed too, for at least another 4-6 weeks. I sure hope he recovers quickly. I need him too help me. We havent been able too get much done lately because of his inability to use both feet. Poor thing!!

Well I just got home after taking Nicholas to the Little Gym. He is in his "new" room right now, and he is supposed to be napping, but I hear him in there.

Madison seems to be moving all the time. My belly is soooo big! But I'm not complaining. This has been a great, physically feeling, kinda pregnancy.

I don't know if I want to sleep or clean or eat. I need to do all three, but only one is what I have time for. Well maybe I can eat before I do one of the other two.

Nicholas is quite now. Maybe he is sleeping....or getting into mischief. I will listen a bit and then check on him. No I am going to check on him right now. Yesterday he destroyed a book at nap time. Gotta go!!!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

Tomorrow is my 36 week appointment. I am excited...I wonder if I am dilated, at all. Probably not, but oh well. I am really not in any big rush. I patiently await her arrival. Don't get me wrong I am very eager too see her, but she will come when she is ready, and I don't want to push that. I still have a ton of things to do. I am one of those people who do best under pressure, so you can believe that I will still not have everything ready a week before.
I am very tired...and very hot! I am so happy that I have less than a month left, because I just can't take the heat, at all. It was only 70 today, and still I was uncomfortably hot and irritable.
My feet are swollen. I am not sure if it is the heat or the pregnancy or both, but they are swollen.
I want something cold ...like sherbert, not icecream, sherbert. I have none so I guess I will have to find another way to satisfy my craving. Probably cereal. When in doubt eat cereal. It is healthy, and cold and crunchy, so it should work.

I can't wait three more minutes and Michael Ryan will go to bed and I will have my bed all to myself. He is watching t.v. in there until 8:30, and Mike is watching sports in the living room, so I need to wait until Michael Ryan is in bed to do my thing. The sacrifices Moms make...and Dad's do what???
I'm going. Bye bye

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

I went to the drs. on Friday and got to see my favorite doctor...Dr. Randall. She is awesome. She was my first doctor that I saw as a gyn patient.
Anyway, I gained 1 pound since last week. I can never go a week without gaining :x . She did not giveme an internal so I am not quite sure of any dilation. She did tell me that it could be any time now and the baby would be completely fine. I had my strep test and that was it. I will see Dr. Eager on Monday of next week. She delievered Michael Ryan, so it will be nice to see her too.

I had a lot of anxiety yesterday. I think it was because of what Dr. Randall had said about it could be any time now. That really hit home for me. I got to thinking that oh my God I am not ready. I am not prepared.
I got real emotional started crying, which I haven't done in a while. So, I did what any girl in emotional stress would have done...I went to get a pedicure. And yes, I did feel a lot better!!
So tonight my dh is at a bachelors party :x . He has ben gone since 12:00. They were going to race cars in Boston, and then take it from there. Whatever!!
My brother Ricky came over today and helped me put together all the baby's equipment. He is so good. He did not read a single direction. He put together a stroller, a swing, a bouncy seat, and a bassinette. In like record time. My poor husband...he is so not a handy man. If my brother did not come and help me I would of had to do it. I mean, dh would have tried just to say that he did something, but I still would of finishing whatever he started. Thank God for having handy men in the family, at least!
Well Michael Ryan is in my room, my T.V. is off, Nicholas is in bed and I can't wait to go to bed. So i will go now, maybe I will peel and orange. Yeah that sounds good. C-ya!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

37 weeks

I am feeling good for the most part. I do have a nauseous feeling every now and then. I do feel a lot fuller after eating small portions, and I do need the bathroom more often now than I ever did.... and I don't just mean #1.
I have been getting many more contractions during the course of a day, but they don't hurt and are certaintly not regular. I am very excited, and nervous, and sometimes overwhelmed...but I guess that comes with the territory.

My dh is graduating on the 21 of this month. I am very excited for him, and wish that I could do something special for him. Right now all I can do is be really happy for him and let him know how proud I am of him.

Michael Ryan has his kidnergarten screening today. This is also very exciting, as he will get to see his new school. The environment in which he will spend many years in. My baby is going to kidnergarten in September!!

Well there is really not much else to report on at this time. I just want to note that I am anxiously awaiting Madison 's arrival. I am sooo excited that I am going to be a new Mommy again, for the third time. 3 weeks to go...hopefully sooner, but we'll see.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

I had terrible, terrible hip/pelvic cramps last night. It was excruiating! I could not get comfortable. Everytime I would turn over it would not take me long to turn again. It's bad enought turning is a project...but add the pressure of my aching hips and that makes for one heck of a night's sleep.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

Mother's Day was nice. My dh bought me a "circle of life" pendant. I wanted one for some time now. Michael Ryan wanted to buy me a lipstick...but dh said he didn't know what shade. Michael Ryan was upset, but I told him I loved the thought anyway, and I told dh that he should of just let Michael Ryan pick any lipstick...I wouldn't of cared. We also went to Providence Place Mall where we had to exchange a curtain rod for Madison's room. While we were there we also picked up a rug for her room...it was on sale! So now we have just about everything we need to get her room in order, we just need to set it up. Of course the crown molding is not put up yet. But I know it will get done. With 2 weeks left for this pregnancy, I can't believe how relaxed I am knowing that the room is not done yet.

I went to my 37 week appointment yesterday. I did not get checked for dilation, she said next week. I lost a pound!!!!That was great news for me, considering I have gained close to 50, so any 1 pound loss is music to my ears. My GBS test came back negative, and my bp was 127/70, I think... but it was great! The baby's hb was 130. It has been the same for about the last month now. It has been high up to this point, maybe she has just really grown.The bigger the baby, the smaller the heart rate.

O.k well I am off!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

I don't know what happen to my post. I had it all down and nothing!

Oh well, here it goes again.

My brother came and hung Madison's curtains on Thursday, early in the morning. He did a beautiful job. The curtains a re pink silk drapes with flowery sheers underneath. My father came that night for dinner and he and dh moved the furniture and laye the rug done. The room looks amazing. I am very happy with how it is turning out. I still need to do work in there but the moldngs have not been put up yet so I want to wait so everything doesn't get dirty. They are supposed to put up sometime next week. My dh is picking the up tomorrow.

Nicholas has went 3 days with no diaper, with the exception of bedtime. He even let me know that he needed to go cocky on the poddy today, for the first time! I am so proud of him. I hope he doesn't regress when Madison comes. He chose to poddy train at this time all on his own. I was leaning on waiting, but I will follow his lead.

38.5 weeks and I am anxious! My dh wants to wait until after is graduation, which is Sunday. But I am like.. no bring it on now!
My honey, I am so proud of him graduating with his Masters in Administration.

I am sooo tired right now, so I am going!!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

I am so extremely miserable, and irritable! I feel soooo bloated it is not even funny. I don't know, sometimes I feel like my body is ready, and other times I feel like I still have a ways to go. Well anyways my dh graduated today. It was nice to see him so happy. However, I was so uncomfortable. I had to sit for about 3 hours and my butt was aching like you can't imagine. Now, my husband says, I can have the baby.
Out of all the days for my camera's batteries to die it would be today, the day I need it the most. Well at least I got two good shots of him anyway.
Tomorrow is my 38 week appointment. I really hope I am dilated or thinned out, something.
Tomorrow night Michael Ryan is graduating from preschool. I can't wait to see him. He has the opening lines in the ceremony. The teacher said it is because he speaks so well. He is really excited, as well as I.
Well speaking of my boy, I need to go and tuck him in.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

I went to the drs. today and found out that I gained 2.5 pds., well that certaintly made up for the one pd. loss last week. Whatever! She did check to see if I was dlated and I am, but only a fingertip!! My next week appointment comes after my due date. She told me what to look out for. Things like my mucas plug don't necessarily have to go for me to know I am in labor. She said if I have any contractions that are regular no matter how far apart(becuase this is my third) to call. So that is what I will wait for.
O.k well I just put Nicholas down for a nap, and I need to eat something!!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

Still nothing! I am due in one week, and I thought maybe something would happen by now. I was 5 days early with Nicholas, and 5 days late with Michael Ryan. Well maybe something will happen over the next couple of days. I just want to see my baby...I am anxious!!!!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

So, last night I was trying to sleep and I had some cramping in my lower belly, almost underneath "the hump". It was then accompanied by some movement from the baby that I could literally feel in my groin. Now I have never felt that before, in that region. It was like it would beat in my belly and follow up with a repeat in the groin. I thought and think well maybe I am dilated more and this is just an open area were I can now feel things. It was a weird sensation, and I thought it would lead to something last night, but nothing!
Today I walked on my treadmill, want to laugh, for 10 minutes.
Believe me, that was enough. It energized me enough to clean my house and do all the laundy that I have been meaning to do.
My father is coming over for dinner tonight. He cooked and is bringing it over. I can't wait! Just heat and serve.
Well I should set the table, he will be here shortly.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

The same type of things happen last night as the previous night. I was really hoping that that was it. I could not sleep for the life of me. Well, I'm still at home waiting for something.
I did have a dream of my baby girl. I got to see her and hold her. She was beautiful, and I remember thinking to myself, in my dream, that she was perfect. She had dark hair and a huge smile. She looked like Michael Ryan. Oh well, We will see what happens tonight. It seems night time is the time, for me, to have all kinds of cramping. I wish I could be checked to see if I dilated any more than a fingertip.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

Last night I really thought that it was "it". To my dismay I was sent home at 2.5 cent. dilation. I tried walking for an hour, but nothing I did gave me the xtra push I needed to go into labor. My contrations just weren't regular. The doc. told me that they had to be at least 3 mins. apart, if they could admit me, or my water has to break, or a bloody show. Now I was having some great contrations and I really thought the intensity was there. It is funny because the minute I arrived at my father's house ( I slept there becuase he was at my house with the kids and his house was so much closer to the hospital) the contractions ceased. I think I have only had one thus far today. What is up with that?? I go from contracting every 7-10 mins. all night, to nothing! She suspets that she will see me later today or tonight, who knows. Tomorrow I have a drs. appt., which I am hoping not to make it to. Come on baby girl!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

I am two days overdue and completely frustrated. I don't think I have had a contraction since yesterday. No nothing! I had a drs. appt. yesterday, and he did strip my membranes, but who knows for sure if that will do anything. I am so sick of people calling me up and asking..."How ya feeling, no baby yet". I just want to scream I will call you if anything happens. Oh yeah frustration is ALL I am feeling...unfortunately!!!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

I am feeling so wacky that I don't even have the patience to wait for this to post.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

Still nothing! I was an emotional wreck last night, and its not because I'm late. It's because of my dh, practically blaming me for not having this baby yet. Can you believe it, what a man!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

Mild contractions last night, and I lost my mucus plug this morning. Finally some progress! Lets hope it is tonight, today or tomorrow. I am getting excited again!!!! Bring on the contractions!

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

Still nothing! I am having more contractions, I feel like going to the hospital and lying just so they can check me and make something happen. Come on Madison...We all want to see you.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

1 week late and still...I wait. Today is my birthday and to be quite frank I really did not want her to have to share a birthday with Mom. Nicholas and dh share a birthday, and I like that they do, but for some reason I really wanted her to have her own special day. My brother didn't want me to have her today because of the superstition of 6-6-06. Whatever! I don't believe in superstitious stuff like that.
So anyways I really felt like have some spicy food tonight, so we went for Mexican. They say that spicy food is a natural way to induce your labor. We will see if it works, but I do love spicy food anyway, and was thrilled to learn that it helps women like me. I also went for a mani./pedi. It would have been relaxing except that I had Michael Ryan there with me and so I had to reprimand him every 5 minutes. I can't blame him, I know he was bored, but he needed to come with me. Dh had Nicholas and he took him with him to the lawyers.
So that was my day, maybe tonight something will happen. Tomorrow I am off to the drs. for a check-up.

Joined: 10/16/05
Posts: 59

I had my baby!!!! June 8, 2006 1:23 a.m.

It was amazing. I went to my routine drs. appt., and she told me I was 2.5 cnt., I was depressed...no change. But, she says there is no reason to wait you are 41 weeks so lets gets it started. I was thrilled. The hospital was going to call me later that day for a scheduled gel that would allow my cervix to open. They call and I need to be there for 7 that night. We get everything ready, drop the kids off at my brothers and arrive at the hosiptal. They check me and tell me that I may need to come back tomorrow morning at 5:15 for the induction. I'm like no way....just freakin keep me. Low and behold I am 4 cent. dilated, but no steady contractions. The nurse still tells me she is unsure if they are going to keep me. My doctor, the doctor on call is there and she, gives the o.k. to keep me. I love her!!!

I get upstairs with the intention of no epidural. I am 5 cent. dilated with the help of a slow drip pitocin and the contractions are coming fast. I can breathe through them but I can tell they are going to get worse. So I ask the nurse if she thinks I should get the epi. She tells me yes, because the contractions are only going to get worse and why would I want to have a baby w/o anthes., noone has surgery w/o it. She has a darn good point so I have them order it. I swear it was perfect timing becuase no sooner that I order it the contractions are right on top of each other, and painful, beyond my dealings. I get it and they check me because I feel pressure, just slightly, down there. I am almost complete they tell me. They get everything ready and I need to push now! I push, and it was like I forgot how too. You have to push like you have to have a bm, and yet for some reason I was just randomly pushing, and couldn't get tit together. After 20 minutes of pushing she was crowning and turning as the doctor and my husband witnessed. This little girl decides to turn just as she comes out. 8 pounds even. I was elated! She came right to my chest and after a few clearings from the doctor she went stright to my breast. The girl latched on like a pro and was sucking like she was starving. Shw recieved an 8 and then a 9 on apagar scoring. She is perfect!
Her head is so round that she came out like a -section baby. Not a mark on her. I feel so blessed! She is sleeping next too me right now in her cradle swing after being up from 11-5 last night into the morning.

So now I don't have to worry about my pregnancy anymore. Now I'm onto worrying about her well being....for the rest of her life!!!