4weeks and 1day!
OK, so this is just a vague introduction post. I have numerous others that have been written privately some of which I'll copy over here!
For those that don't know me but want to follow my journal, my name is Sarah-Jean and I'm 25 years old. I have been married to Martin (aged 31) since September 2000 and we have five beautiful children together who are;
Tristan born on the 18th April 2001 weighing 8lbs 2oz. (Induced hospital birth)
Jaeven born on the 24th March 2002 weighing 7lbs. (Induced hospital birth)
Raistlin born on the 4th February 2004 weighing 7lbs 6oz (Natural hospital birth)
Ashton born 26th December 2005 weighing 7lbs 9oz. (Home water birth)
Lacey-Rose born 17th August 2007 weighing 10lbs 2oz. (Home water birth)
I have a number of health problems and past pregnancy history which means I am considered very high risk. These include;
Pre-Eclampsia in several pregnancies
Multiple miscarriages / blighted ovum pregnancies
Severe SPD which leaves me unable to walk when it's bad
Unexplained and uncontrollable pregnancy induced migraines
Silent/fast labours and births
Possible Gestational diabetes (have always refused testing for it)
Multiple PEs (blood clots in my lungs)
And to add to all that I was on Warfarin until yesterday when I was switched to Clexane (I think that's spelt properly!). As I believe, Warfarin can cause deformities, complications and even death in the unborn although I'm not sure what exactly.
I spent yesterday down the hospital to sort out my medications and am just waiting for an appointment with a heamatologist (spelling?!) to discuss exactly what we're going to do treatment wise, as it was a bit of a panic to just get me stopped on the Warfarin and changed over to heparin quickly so there isn't actually a plan yet of what's going to happen!
Pregnancy wise I am doing OK... Feel really sick right now but it's manageable. I also feel quite crampy and bloated but that's not unusual for me in early pregnancy. I'm pretty tired as well and my patience is wearing thin. For some reason I'm really emotional this pregnancy, I can't stop crying over silly things - I don't remember being that way in previous pregnancies but I'm sure I must have been. My boobs are massive and sore as well and my skin is awful although my hair looks great!!!
My first guess for gender is Boy this time. I've just got a feeling this is another boy and I'm quite happy with that! DH thinks it's a girl this time, as does Tristan and JJ thinks it boy/girl twins!
I am vaguely hoping for a home water birth again so my kids can be there... But I'm pretty sure with the blood clots and heparin I won't be allowed and to be honest I'm more weary this time then ever before as I'm aware my health is bad and I'm in real danger of something going wrong with either me or baby.
If the Warfarin has damaged the baby I don't know what I'll do. My gut says I'll carry on regardless and take whatever comes my way. I mean you're only faced with what you can handle right?! But DH is a bit more cagey about it and just says he'll cross that fence when we get there... Which doesn't help me a lot as I need a plan of action in place!
I can't really think of anything else. We aren't telling many people in real life yet as we want to wait for the NT scan... When we tell people we're expecting baby #6 we don't want to then have to go back and say there's a problem - we'd rather tell people we're expecting and there's a problem at the same time.
Anyway, I'll go and post some of my old posts and then carry on with my journal as per normal!!!
Oh, and this baby is due on the 24th October!
Last edited by Sarah-Jean; 02-16-2008 at 05:32 AM.
So here's the posts I've made since finding out on Valentines day!!!
Posted: Thu Feb 14, 2008 8:30 am Post subject: Oh. My. God.
I think I might have just got a faint BFP this morning.....
I had given up all hope of getting a BFP, and then this morning there was definately a faint line on the test which hasn't happened before this cycle. I'm thinking I might hold my pee and try again a bit later and see what happens then........
To be honest, I'm a bit shocked, I'd given up on this cycle and figured I had to wait until 2011!!!!
Posted: Fri Feb 15, 2008 7:25 am Post subject:
Well.... Three tests yesterday, two so far today before 6am and I think I have my answer as to why I've been feeling so sick....
Am calling the Drs first thing this morning and getting an emergency appointment... He's going to kill me, but I don't care! LOL
What a great Valentines day present though... I mean, I dreamed this would happen (as in proper nighttime dream) but I didn't really believe it would so I am in shock at the moment....
So far feeling extremely sick... That's about it really, the sickness dulls everything else down!!! LOL
Oh, and just because I forgot before I have a game going at expectnet.com under the name of hosierbaby6 if anyone wants to add a guess!Posted: Fri Feb 15, 2008 7:56 pm Post subject:
Well, it's now 7pm and I left for my 1st Drs appointment at 10:30am! I got in and seen and the Dr was very caring and kind. He spoke to me at great length to figure out my risks and health history and then phoned through to the hospital and spoke to them. I was then sent straight in to see a gynae about it and spent the rest of the day there (they wanted me to stay until tomorrow afternoon but wasn't in the mood!).
I am now off warfarin and on heparin (can't remember which one exactly, began with a C!) and will be sent for various tests etc to check for deformities and other problems later on in the pregnancy. It's also possible I have a UTI which they're testing for. I have also been told I can take folic acid, which is great as wasn't allowed it whilst on Warfarin!
I have to go back to hospital tomorrow to pick up my heparin injections (the pharmacy had closed by the time they sent off for it!). Then on Monday I have to go and collect my papers and green notes from my Drs surgery and book in for a midwife (if I don't go private like I did last time) appointment. I also have to see my heamatology (spelling?!) consultant to discuss the real risks and what happens next with my treatment.
I will probably have to have a viability scan around 6-8weeks, plus another scan at around 10-12 weeks and a proper NT scan. Depending on what they show will depend on further testing for deformities and complications such as downs syndrome and spina bifida (I think that's what they said!).
Erm... I think that's all..... It was a very busy and confusing day! LOL
Oh, and DH is ecstatic! I told him yesterday just before we went out for dinner... And he's really excited and happy!!!
On another note we're already thinking names.... I told DH if we had another girl he can call her whatever he likes. So far his suggestions have been Sienna (which I think is nice), Jennifer (*shudders*) and Sarah-Jayne (like me but different - not on his life!)....
Boys names so far the favourite is Brenton (nn Brent) but there are various others... Ruben, Lucien, Quentin, Devon, Roman, Lincoln, Rhydian.... Brent is the favourite so far!
Everything is slipping into place. We're making OK money from work with the aura photography, and also got home from a better then expected Drs and Hospital trip to find that DH had some more work in for next Wednesday. So he's out on site on Monday and Wednesday and we're doing Aura Photography on Thursday.... Things are finally falling into place for us!!!!
DHs current guess is we're having a girl. I say we're having a boy and neither of us cares either way!!!! I am planning on telling the kids tomorrow not that JJ will be surprised as he's been insisting for at least the last two weeks that I have a baby in my tummy. That boy has some serious psychic powers going on! Mind you, he also said we'd end up a family of ten... I hope he's wrong - can't imagine 8 children!!!! LOL
And even more spookily I had some strange 8 year old approach me in the hospital, he was alone and asked me if I knew where the shop was, so I pointed him in the right direction at which point he asked us if we could walk him there. Well, I was kinda miffed that his parents would just let him wonder around a large and busy hospital by himself so said yes... And as we were walking there he asked me if I was pregnant!!! I'm not showing and don't act it, so how the heck do all these boys KNOW I'm pregnant??!!! Mind you he also asked me if my baby was sick....
Anyway, because of my trauma today (needle phobic) and celebrating and stuff we're getting a chinese take-away for dinner so I'm going to go and enjoy my meal!!!!
4weeks and 2days!
I have made myself a promise that I will enjoy this pregnancy... And so far I really am! I'm not stressing over gender or health stuff, not upset or worried about my symptoms or lack of them, not stressed about miscarriage... I figure what's the point in worrying? I've worried in all my other pregnancies and it's tiring and depressing and does no good anyway so for now I'm going to just enjoy myself.
Only mild annoyance so far is that they told me I'd only need one injection a day and when Martin went and collected my prescription yesterday apparently I need two injections of Clexane a day now instead. The've only shown us how to do it in my stomach and so far I've had two injections and now both sides of my stomach are horribly bruised. I don't know how this can continue as otherwise they'll never be able to examine me or feel my stomach because it'll be too sore and bruised to touch!
I'm going to ask them to show Martin how to do it in my arms and legs when I see someone next!
I've already started shopping for maternity clothes! LOL Well, Martin insisted actually. He said if this is my last pregnancy, he wants it to be a yummy mummy style pregnancy with all the trimmings! So far he's bought me a pair of nice maternity jeans, a nice purple wrap around maternity top and a pair of yoga pants.
We're split at the moment about finding out the gender, the boys and Martin want to know ASAP but I'm really not sure I do. I've always found out - first couple of times it was for the novelty factor because our local hospital wouldn't tell you at the time, and then it became a gender issues - were we finally having a girl after all these boys type of thing. And there isn't really an issue with that now - I don't care whether this baby is a boy or a girl, I love him/her either way and I've never been able to look after the birth and see what we've got. I don't know though - I'm also really impatient!!! LOL
Symptoms wise, not a lot is going on right now. I feel sick quite a bit, am fairly tired but can't sleep and have been having really vivid but meaningless dreams the past week. Feel very emotional too over silly little things... But other then that I am pretty much OK!
Martin is working away all day tomorrow so I'm going to have to walk with the kids down to the Drs surgery to pick up my papers (whatever they are!) and make an appointment with the midwife and recheck that they're going to check my INR on Wednesday... Apparently they told Martin that I would be called to see a heamatologist (yep, still don't know if that's spelt properly or not!) very soon but I don't know whether they'll phone me or write to me or what, so I suppose I could ask about that tomorrow too! I can also pick up my folic acid prescription too.
Anyway, I better go and get my first injection of the day over and done with... Two days in and I'm already running out of unbruised spaces to inject!!! LOL Fun, fun, fun!
4weeks and 3days!
I have gone mad with spending the last couple of days. I'm a bit worried as I'm not even 5 weeks pregnant yet and could miscarry at any time, and even if I don't my baby could have serious problems because of the Warfarin, but I can't seem to help it. It's like if I buy things and believe this pregnancy will work out all OK then it will - which I know is stupid but it's how I prefer to think right now!
So far, I have bought a pair of Vertbaudet maternity jeans, a pair of yoga pants, a maternity top from E-vie, a fictional book on motherhood and erm.... A dark wood four-poster cot.
Why the hell I bought a cot I will never know!!!! I've already got a lovely white four-poster cot for Lacey-Rose that doesn't get used, and we've got Ashton's which he's just about to move out of and now I've bought this dark wood four-poster cot too..... ...... Was fun though!
I'm hoping to go and collect it tomorrow if all goes well! I've got to drive to Cambridge to get it though and probably go alone because I'll neat the seats in the car down.
I went to the Drs again today to pick up my maternity papers and notes and get a midwives appointment. Apparently she's not going to see me until the end of March. Sorry, but high risk pregnancy here... Need a bit more care then the end of bloody March. Martin is furious that despite the fact my life could be compromised the NHS can't get off their arses and see me for over a month and is phoning the midwife we used last time tonight to see if she will take me on despite my health... I'm thinking if they keep me on the Clexane then I will have a hospital birth because I'm scared of bleeding out... If they take me off the blood thinners then I may consider a home water birth again. Really I need to speak to the heamatologist (still haven't checked the spelling on that!) and find out what they intend to do but have no idea when I'll get an appointment through for that either.
I guess I'm just mildly disappointed. I was surprised by how swiftly they moved to get me off the warfarin and now I'm on the Clexane they don't seem to care anymore.
My little Lacey-Rose turned 6 months yesterday.... I can't get my head around the fact she's already going to be a big sister....
Pregnancy wise I am OK. Tired as spent the last 6 hours in the care travelling to London (traffic was appalling), doing some thermal surveys and then travelling back.... Blah!
Best be off... I am being hassled by Raistlin to bake some Thomas the Tank Engine cup cakes with him!!! LOL
4weeks and 5days!
I am upset today. Went for my regular INR appointment with the Warfarin nurse. For one she didn't know I was pregnant - I mean, she's one door down from the Dr I saw and it's on the computer system! Then she went on to tell me that she knew it woulc/could cause problems with the baby but she didn't know what or whether that would still apply because we found out so early and got off Warfarin so quickly.A baby is an angel whose wings decrease as his legs increase
She then asked me if I would consider a termination if the Dr thought my health was at too much risk. And then made a comment about how either me or DH should get tied or snipped.
Basically she didn't know anything about the situation or what to do with me and took my blood although only after I insisted the hospital had told me I must have my INR levels checked
So apparently she was going to speak to a Dr and phone me at lunchtime. Well lunchtime has been and gone and no phone call so far.
I was more upset and more incoherant earlier but I've calmed down now. There is no way I will EVER consider a termination again. My last one left me so mentally scarred I can't go through that again no matter what the risk or reason. It still makes me cry even to this day and I still feel anger, guilt and hurt over what I did. I swear that it is the cause of a lot of my depression issues.
I am now of the belief that nature chooses it's own course... And if my baby is sick and not meant to be here, then nature will deal with it. I'm not willing to interfere by having my baby broken up and sucked from my body. I just can't even think about it, it's too awful.
I love my baby, even now, even though he/she is soo small and seems like nothing to a lot of people. He/she is everything to me, and I can't stand to think of doing anything other then loving him/her for what he/she is - no matter whether my baby is sick or deformed or whatever the hell Warfarin does to babies (still don't know exactly!).
I would willingly die for anyone of my children and that includes the one growing inside of me now.
Anyway, onto nicer things. I am trying to figure out the bedroom configuration for when this baby arrives. If it's another girl it's easy. Four boys in the biggest room, two girls in the next room size down, then we get Lacey-Rose's current bedroom back as an office for Martin. If it's another boy then it's more complicated. Lacey-Rose will stay in her room, then we'll have to split three boys into the biggest room and two into the room next to it... But which three boys. My current thoughts are to have Tristan and JJ in the smaller room and the three younger boys in the bigger room. Tristan and JJ aren't too happy about the thought of that but I don't think they're seeing the benefits - their beds, desks, computers, games, broadband, TV, DVDs etc all in their own room away from the smaller kids who break their things.
I'll figure it out once I know what we're having.
Appointment wise I have got in touch with my wonderful midwife from last time. I'm not happy with the way my treatment is already going with the NHS and I don't believe they have my best interests at heart. Martin has basically insisted on calling Valerie and seeing if she will take me on. I'm not sure she will because I know her major scary thing is blood clots and I did have a rather serious case of it!!! I hope we can afford it though and she will take me on because I love her to bits as a midwife, and I love having my appointments at home and knowing she supports my decisions and gives me proper advice about my health not the NHS standard jargon. Plus I can still go to hospital and give birth there and she might be able to arrange a temporary contract (think she has done this in the past) so she can care for me there too. And if not she will at least be there to offer me advice and help me fend of the midwives on the ward. I don't know. She just makes me feel safer, like I'm getting some proper healthcare. And if this is going to be my last baby (and seriousely, I think my body has had enough now) I want to enjoy it without being stressed out by arguing with the blinkin' NHS all the time.
I'm also booking in for a private scan. I really need/want to have a very indepth NT scan (can only get this privately) at around 13weeks to tell me if there are any signs of problems with the baby because of the warfarin... And the NHS has only offered me a scan at just before 13weeks and I really need to know my dates a long time before then! So I am booking in for a private one for around 8 weeks and hopefully picking up the stuff I need for blood tests etc for the NT scan at the same time.
I am surprised with the way my life is going. It's like this baby is a blessing in our lives. Ever since I got pregnant everything has got better. Normally it works the other way around - once I get pregnant disaster after disaster happens. All of a sudden we have money coming in, Martin has tons of work on, I feel healthier, the kids seem to be doing well and everyone seems happier in our family. It's been a long time since any of us were really very happy.
Martin is worried after my appointment today. I keep telling him that this baby is a little blessing. He/she was meant to be and whatever will happen will happen. It's too late to worry about it now. I mean, seriousely, if he didn't want this baby (and he did so that's not an issue) he should have been more careful! Why does Birth Control always have to come down to me?! If I want a baby and he doesn't, he should take more care to ensure it doesn't happen!
Ok, well maybe not... But still! It's not ALL my fault?! I didn't know I would ovulate earlier then I ever have before! It's never happened in the past....
I can't wait to meet this little guy/girl! I am still feeling pretty much OK. A bit sick on and off and very tired but otherwise OK!
4weeks and 6days!
I am happy, happy, happy today!!!! And a little bit sick... But still happy!
Martin just got what could potentially be quite a big job in and even better it's ongoing work. The company (a major rail company I think) emailed him for info today, he phoned them and they basically said come have a look around and then give us a quote!!! How cool! That's approx. four jobs that came in, in the last 2 weeks or so, his business has never been so busy before. I'm so glad he ditched his last business and set this one up instead.
He also spoke to the midwife I used last time for me last night and she is more then happy to take me on again!!! Woohoo! And today we are booking a private scan for when I'm about 8weeks pregnant... Everything is coming good right now!
Oh, the nurse did call me back yesterday. At 6:30pm. So much for lunchtime. She basically just said the Dr had written me a prescription for Clexane which I could pick up today and that he was going to write to the gynae department to try and jiggle them along with my care. Can't see it happening though, not quickly at any rate.
I have got a phone number for my heamatology department and am quite inclined to get Martin to phone them up and try and get me an appointment with them himself, as nobody seems to know if, or when, or how they're going to contact me.
Supposed to be working tonight but really don't feel well. I really don't want to go but Martin is really riding my back these days with doing stuff and changing my mind at the last minute so I doubt he'll let me out of it. Ah well!
I have my first appointment with my midwife next Tuesday at 4:30pm. Can't wait - it'll be so great to see her again!!! Now we've just got to hope the money keeps coming in so we can afford to pay for all this stuff. We've got to really, as it's clear the NHS has no intention of treating me appropriately so my only option to have a healthy pregnancy is to go private for as much as we can afford.
Can't believe I'll be 5 weeks tomorrow. And straight into my "danger zone" for miscarraige. I'm going to try not to stress over the next two weeks, but 5 and 6 weeks is normally when it happens, so I guess there's no escaping it now!
I'm 5weeks pregnant today. Our little pumpkin is due in 35weeks!
According to my pregnancy ticker, you are now an embryo and your heart will begin beating this week. I can't believe how quickly you are developing already and how fast the time is flying. It won't be long before you're here and we're all cooing over how gorgeous you are and what a little miracle you are to us.
I'm just trying to take a nice belly picture. I didn't enjoy my other pregnancies enough and took virtually no momento's of the event except my journals which I only wrote for DS3, DS4, DD1 and this baby... Only problem is I can't show my stomach. 1/. It's covered in stretch marks and looks like jelly! And 2/. It's horribly, horribly bruised right now and I think the bruises are making me look bigger then I am as my stomach is swollen. I just took a couple of photo's but they aren't good so going to get dressed and take some more and will post them here once I'm done!
I can't remember if I said the other day or not but I am going with my indie midwife again. I just can't be bothered with the constant backwards and forwards of the NHS it's too stressful and so far as I can see this pregnancy is going to be pretty stressful already because of my health and the fact we probably won't know for sure if baby is 100% OK until it's born if what I read is right. I am also booked in for scans on the 19th March, 10th April and my big NT scan on the 23rd April. Hopefully we'll also be able to find out the gender of baby on the 23rd April too! I won't get my hopes up too high though, I mean we found out last time with Lacey-Rose but I know a lot of people who couldn't tell at that stage. I will be in the late 13+weeks though so it should be more visible then it was with Lacey-Rose - so fingers crossed.
We have been talking names too. So far our favourites are Lily-May/Lily-Mae/Lily-Marie for a girl and Brenton Thomas/Brenton Peter for a boy. We'll probably change our minds a thousand times though until we find out the gender! LOL
I am still annoyed at my GPs surgery. Considering I went in last week and told them I was pregnant and they put it on their computer system. I then had to explain the same thing over to the Nurse I saw (who's literally right next door to the Dr I saw!) on Wednesday and then yesterday again I got a call from another Dr there saying he'd got my INR results and they were very strange as for some unknown reason it'd gone down to 1. And I said yes, that's because I stopped taking the Warfarin a week ago and he asked me why!!!! I mean FOR GODS SAKE!!!! It's on the screen in front of your face - can't they read????!!!!!! So I explained all that had happened this past week, and he was much the same as the others there and had no clue what will happen next or when or why or anything. Basically they all know Jack-Sh!t apparently.
I'm not letting it bother me though. I'm just going to leave them to muddle along themselves. I have arranged my own scans and my own midwife and care and they can catch up whenever they figure it out. I can't be bothered with it anymore.
Healthwise I am OK. Felt really rough yesterday but feel a bit better today. Mainly I am suffering from fatigue. I am constantly tired, but unable to sleep so am also suffering insomnia too! A little bit of morning sickness but nothing I can't handle yet. And very, very bloated but I think that's partially to do with my injections and how bruised my stomach is. Oh and the only real bummer is that my hips and pelvis are playing up really badly the last few days. It can't possibly be SPD already, surely? I mean it never fully went away but for them to get this bad, this early on?? At any rate whatevers causing it, it's not pleasant. Everytime I move I hear my bones scraping together or cracking in and out of place and today I swear my hip and leg bone twisted out of place... I suddenly couldn't walk very well and the pain was awful and it's only just now beginning to feel like my bones are connected the way they should be.
Little man/lady, you are going to be one big challenge from the get-go aren't you!!! I don't mind though, it's only a few short months for a lifetime of gain, so I'll be OK!
I am going to go and get dressed and take a belly pic... Be right back!
Me today, yeah I'm tired and I look it! LOL In my lovely new E-vie maternity top!
And a scary close-up! God I look huge!
5weeks and 1day!
I think reality is setting in now. I am suddenly feeling very nervous and scared of what could go wrong. So many factors, so little chance. If it's not the baby, it's me and I've suddenly become very paranoid about every ache and pain and strange feeling.
I am also getting pretty fed up with Martin. It's a weekend, he's pretty much ignored us and spent the last few weeks doing nothing but shouting at us and telling us to go away or shut up and I've kind of had enough now. It's the weekend, step away from the flipping computer.
It's like he's being really pig-headed about transportation as well. We can NOT fit 6 car seats into our current car. Besides, it's not even running or road legal right now. No MOT, no Insurance, nothing. We've spent the whole of the last week with the kids going insane because we can't go anywhere because we have no car and now he's insisting we keep the stupid van and just put a bench seat in the middle of it which he knows from experience the car seats slide off of despite the seatbelts and which don't go forward so the kids can climb in and out. And worse then that's he's spent the whole of the morning mocking whatever suggestion I make like I'm ****ing stupid.
And now, just to illustrate my point, Lacey-Rose was crying and wanted attention so he's picked her up, put her in her car seat, propped a flipping bottle in her mouth (despite knowing how much it pisses me off) and is ignoring her again. WTF.
Not impressed at all. His parenting skills are seriousely lacking and I'm beginning to wonder why I ever had even one child with him, let alone 6.
I mean, I know I'm on the computer a lot but I make time for the kids. Even now I've just broken up a fight between Raistlin and Ashton and now am playing cars with Ashton at the same time as typing this. And once I've finished doing this I'm going to go and make cakes with the two older boys and help them do their homework seeing as I asked Martin to help me with it and he's just not bothered. He never reads with them or helps them do their homework, or plays with them or talks to them. It's ridiculous.
Anyway, pregnancy wise I feel like crap. I spent the whole night dreaming that I was miscarrying or my baby was deformed or I died. Yesterday I'm pretty sure my leg had mildly dislocated from the joint as I was in a lot of pain and could barely walk and my leg and foot were at an odd angle until it clunked back into place, I feel sick and tired and now I'm irritable too.
It'd be OK if I wasn't married to a poor excuse for a father who'd get off his arse and spend some time with the children he insisted he wanted rather then surfing Ebay and spending money he doesn't actually have.
Yeah. I'm pissy today.
5weeks and 2days!
So, I'm feeling less grumpy today. I think Martin has gone to help fix my brothers car and then my brother is babysitting the boys whilst we go for a walk around the city centre with Lacey-Rose. My midwife has an antenatal exhibition up there today which I wanted to go too.
I am feeling OK today. Tired as normal but it's manageable. Martin is working tomorrow and I've got to do all the childcare by myself for the first time in ages, including three school runs. Oh well, I'll manage it I'm sure!
Pregnancy wise I am doing OK. Still very worried, and I seem to be getting more and more worried as I go along. There's 24 days until my first ultrasound when we should hopefully see the baby is alive and growing well... But we've got to wait until the end of April for my NT scan which seems such a long way away right now.
On a baby front I can already feel the pressure on me to have another girl. To be honest I truly don't mind what we have, this is the first pregnancy that I've had where there are very real concerns for both my own and my baby's health. Gender isn't even on my list of things to think about, I just want a healthy baby and yet everyone in real life and online is starting in on the comments about how it must surely be a girl this time. I'm beginning to get a bit offended - it's almost like they're saying another boy wouldn't be as special as if I had a girl. I am getting to the point where I am thinking of just not telling people unless they're very close to me what we're having so I don't have to then listen to all the "oh, another boy. I'm so sorry" or "Great a girl, are you going to stop now then?!".... Why is it upto other people to tell me if my family is either finished or not good enough because my kids aren't the right gender?!
For the record, I have bigger things to worry about then whether my baby has a bloody penis or not!!!!! LOL
Anyway, I suppose I'd better go and get ready to go out.
5weeks and 3days!
OK, so today hasn't been too bad. Martin is working so I am doing all three of the school runs myself today which is a bit of a shock to the system! I got them all there on time this morning although it was disaster after disaster doing it!!! LOL Firstly I forgot Raisti's book bag, and then on the way to school he had an accident. His spare clothes and indoor shoes are all in his book bag so that was a bit of an annoyance. Got Tristan and JJ to their classes in plenty of time and then went to drop Raisti off who threw a huge tantrum saying he didn't want to go to school and he hates school (not true he loves it there!) and he feels sick and he wants to go home etc etc. I explain that he's had an accident and I've forgotten his book bag with his indoor shoes and his spare clothes so we sort him out with some other clothing and then I go to leave by which time he's shouting and screaming. I told the teacher I was just going to go as that may be easier and she agreed, so I left and he came chasing out after me, it took two teachers to physically drag him kicking and screaming back in.
In a way I really wish I'd just taken him home, but they did reassure me that they'd call me if he didn't settle down and they haven't called yet.
I have my first midwife appointment tomorrow. I am so excited as I love seeing my midwife! She's just so lovely and was a complete godsend to me in my last pregnancy. I am also dying to ask her where else I can inject myself. My stomach is now so bruised and sore I couldn't bring myself to let Martin give me my morning injection. It took me until 11pm last night to pluck up the courage to let him give me my afternoon injection as well. It can't go on like this cos I can see myself just refusing the have them anymore at this rate. Plus my stomach looks awful, completely covered in bruising and now I seem to be developing painful hard lumps under the skin.
Little Pumpkin, you'll never know how hard this is for me, and yet I'm happy to do it for you.
Sigh... I've been home just over an hour and now I have to get ready to go back out to the school to do the lunchtime run (Raisti finished school at 11:15am every day, Tristan and JJ finish at 3pm).... I'm already knackered from the first run as the walk back is all uphill.