How do i deal with the loss?

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Last seen: 5 years 8 months ago
Joined: 04/15/11
Posts: 1
How do i deal with the loss?

Hi Everyone!

It hurts just to wrote this note but here goes......6 weeks ago I lost my baby boy Nathan...I was 6 month pregnant.....he live only for 4 hours after he was born.....I can not wrote any more for now because am crying... can some one please tell me how to deal with this loss it hurts so much.....


CharleneDokter's picture
Last seen: 4 years 5 days ago
Joined: 09/18/10
Posts: 250

I am so sorry. I personally have had two losses, but both were a lot earlier then yours and so I feel like my experiences are somewhat less then yours. My mother however lost her second child a few hours after he was born (also at about six months) and I remember her advise was to find someone to talk to. Back then, it was not normal to go to a councilor or anything like that, but I know with my second loss, I did and it really did help. For something so traumatic and horrible, six weeks is not long enough to grieve. I'm sure that with time you will start to feel better. But you shouldn't put too much pressure on yourself to "hurry up and recover". There are no right and wrong ways to feel after a loss. I found that it helps to vent. A lot. To anyone who doesn't walk away or cringe when you talk. I find that with losses, people dont know what to say and so they just carry on with life and you start to feel like your the only one who isn't "normal" and that everyone else has forgotten. That was what was most painful for me with my losses. I was almost forced to just "be okay" and to work and do fun things and carry on with my life like nothing had happened. The first time, I tried really hard to do that and it made everything so much worse. The second time, I refused to play along. If people asked me how I was, I told the truth. If I didn't want to do something, I said no and why. It made people uncofrotable, but at least I got the support I needed from those closest to me the second time around. Make sure you have support. If your family and friends are not doing what you need them to, tell them. Someitmes people just don't know how to react and how to help. There's nothing wrong with laying out exactly what you need. If they still don't support you the way you need, go see someone. Really. I hope you find some peace soon.

Last seen: 5 years 4 months ago
Joined: 06/28/11
Posts: 4

There never is really an easy way to deal with a loss but prayers and acceptance is the key. I am so sorry for your loss but know and believe that no matter how painful, there is always a reason behind every loss and pain that we go through, it may not seem to make sense now but soon. God bless you.