i dont know what to do. (way ot!)

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BabiesRBlessings's picture
Joined: 10/24/13
Posts: 1106
i dont know what to do. (way ot!)

Is there anyone here that is a stay at home mom that feels like they need external fullfillment?

I feel like I need to go to school for something so that I can get a part time job when Eli starts school (if I don't homeschool) or something that I could start at home.

I have so many interests I don't know what to do. those of you that have careers outside the home, what made you decide to do that type of work?

K9Trainer's picture
Joined: 09/25/06
Posts: 4065

YES!!!! I can say that this is sooooo true for me, particularly with my first not so much these two. I went from job to job with him looking for that "fulfillment", but hating not being with him. Sad It's soooo hard. And you know you're doing a great thing by being with him, but at the same time you miss adults and having your own life. I soooo understand Liz. Honestly, my BB really helped me this time. I am completely isolated where I am now, with no family at all, but having PO really helped and now this board and scrapping. My online friends are my best friends. Smile And I feel like I've made a choice to be home with my kids, but I can still be sad about it once in a while. That's okay and doens't make me a bad mommy. Smile Hugs to you...PM me if you want to talk more okay???

scrapangel's picture
Joined: 10/05/07
Posts: 807

YES!! I have been a stay at home mom for about 5 years now and as much as I love staying home with my kids I feel like i need to contribute more than just taking care of the kids. Part of this is because since I was 15 I was working and never was out of "work" for this long. So I feel the need to go and do something. I want to go back to school once all my kids are in some sort of school and will probably be back in the working field by the time they are all above grade 3 or so.

BabiesRBlessings's picture
Joined: 10/24/13
Posts: 1106

I'm so glad I'm not the only one!!! Don't get me wrong i LOVE LOVE LOVE staying home with Eli. I guess my hang ups on wanting to be outside the house are that certain people around me (not dh, other family) feel that being a stay at home mom is not a job, that it's not worthy. My mom has a college education and has always thought that to be successful, you need a college education.

I just don't know what to do..lol Cosmetologist, esthetitian, CSI, graphic artist....all of these things interest me but I don't know which one to do. LOL

mnbarmy's picture
Joined: 06/13/07
Posts: 334

Oh yes!

I'm trying to get my "fulfillment" by going to school online. The college here in LR offers fully online degrees so I'm working on that. They allow you to choose three emphasis areas so I'm getting mine in Sociology, Psychology and Health Sciences. I really feel like I need this because if I get a degree, it is something that no one can take away. Paxton is "our" child, this is "our" home, they're "our" cars....when I graduate it will be MY degree and I think that will really just round out life!

mommys's picture
Joined: 05/08/06
Posts: 6264

I'm in a wierd situation because I have worked since Andrea was born and also been with her full time. I find that I don't really get fulfillment from my job at all. I'd rather not have to work to be honest. Much of my fulfillment comes from my crafts - I get much more satisfaction in finished stuff at home than in my day-to-day tasks at work. I only say all this to show the other side of the coin.

Joined: 09/01/04
Posts: 1436

Basically since becoming a SAHM/WAHM I have been torn. I didn't really have a "career". I have been waiting to decide that we are finished having kids. Then, I will go back to school and start something. I waited so long to do school that we didn't want to start and stop for fear that some of my schooling would become outdated before I could get into the workforce. I technically work at home. I homeschool 2 kids approximately 3 days a week. I HATE IT! I love the kids but homeschooling someone else's children is not the ideal situation for anybody. I do it because I make just as much as I was outside the home and I don't have to pay for daycare. Plus, now that we are baking #2, I couldn't really see us paying for 2 kids in daycare so it's homeschool or nothing.

I miss humans. I have found that I have been doing a lot more on the internet. I have been forcing myself to use this "free time" wisely. I am picking back up on my reading and learning to do the things that I didn't know before like cooking and such. I look at SAH as a short term situation lasting for a few years. In the meantime, I'm not just sitting here waiting. I'm learning what I can.

MommyCB's picture
Joined: 05/04/06
Posts: 7623

I know what you mean. For me it's mainly I know I could get a job and contribute, but I also want to stay home with Kayson full-time. I have nothing against childcare, but here where I live the pickings are slim and not something I want to put K in. We also don't have ANY family within 3 1/2 hours, so that's not an option either. God has always provided and worked it out, so for that I'm so grateful.

But I do cater part-time from home. I just got 2 more jobs this morning booked, and it's a job I can do from home without sending K to daycare. I earn probably as much in 2-3 jobs as I would with a "regular" job working 40 hours. It's a lot of work, but I love it! I also help a friend who owns a catering business a few times a month on her huge jobs. I sell Pampered Chef too. All of these things I can do from home.

Do you have MOPS or something similar where you live? I am going to a MOPS meeting tomorrow with a friend. It's nice to get out and visit with other moms. So important to stay sane. Wink

Plus, like Carrie, my internet friends are my best friends. I have met some of the most amazing woman on PO who I consider more than friends.....more like sisters.

BabiesRBlessings's picture
Joined: 10/24/13
Posts: 1106

Thanks for all the different sides ladies.

I think I'm wanting to be able to contribute financially to the family. I know dh struggles with the fact that he doesn't provide well enough to keep food on the table by the end of the month.

i've thought about getting my cosmetology or esthetitian license. I could do that from home, or part time evenings. I don't know how we'll afford it though. Sad

sadieruth's picture
Joined: 06/09/05
Posts: 6178

Liz- a lot of times you can get help from the gov't to go back to school. The FAFSA is what helped me pay for school, until Randall and I made too much money. :rolleyes: Which still wasn't enough in my honest opinion b/c school is one hour away. Anyways, try finding a school close-by and looking into things. Sometimes, you might find medical transcriptionist classes online, or something like that. I don't know how much $ they pay, but it's worth it just for some extra income. Usually they offer jobs where you work from home. Or at least that is what I have heard. Don't think school is out of reach, b/c if you guys are struggling, FAFSA should help. It did us. I am hoping after this baby, we will get it again, and I can FINALLY finish.

I also wanted to add, that when I was staying at home, I felt like I wasn't human anymore. Of course, I was keeping a few kids, and that was what made it hard, but honestly, PO was what kept me going. That and scrapping. So, remember, we are here for you no matter what.

Also, what about keeping a few kids in your home? What do you think about that? That would give Eli someone to play with, and you could make a few $ on the side. In some states, you can have so many kids without having to get a license. I never got one. I won't say it's easy, but if I would have had more room, I would have kept going. Plus, just a few wouldn't be too hard. KUP ok hon!

BabiesRBlessings's picture
Joined: 10/24/13
Posts: 1106

Thanks Sadie. Smile I am going through FAFSA and I have decided to continue with my original plan of doing an online criminal investigation degree.

I am watching a little boy M-W, and the lsat few weeks it has been M-f. Biggrin which I love having here for Eli. Eli looks for austyn in the mornings! it's so cute. and then he is upset if he isn't here. lol poor guy

Joined: 12/22/06
Posts: 1152

"mommys" wrote:

I'm in a wierd situation because I have worked since Andrea was born and also been with her full time. I find that I don't really get fulfillment from my job at all. I'd rather not have to work to be honest. Much of my fulfillment comes from my crafts - I get much more satisfaction in finished stuff at home than in my day-to-day tasks at work. I only say all this to show the other side of the coin.

Wow, this is exactly how I feel. I've worked 12 years straight (and this isn't just Bath & Body Works) and I totally feel ready to become a SAHM. I love scrapping and it definitly satisfies me, though.......I feel like, even if it's for as little as 3 hours a week, just to get out and work and interact w/ adults would be great too. So I've got to decide if I want to leave my job all together or just step down and work a few hours here and there just to get out!

In the end, Liz, it's all what makes YOU happy. You can't base your happiness off of what people THINK you should do.

Joined: 03/16/15
Posts: 53852

I am PT SAH and PT preschool teacher. I work M/W's from 8:45am-1:45pm and T/TH 8:45-11:30 or so. Its great because my Dh can watch Zylin in his office (we work at the same church) when Zylin is Not in school and I am. Zylin goes to the morning M/W class. I assist in that one and I teach the other two. Its good to get out of the house and talk to people. I would say its about the right amount of time to be out and home. I just wish I could sleep in more often Wink I would love to work with Animals, or craft stuff, but thats not in the cards right now. I hope you can find something that you would like to do. Have you thought about selling some of your talent online? You're digi stuff is amazing and you could definately sell templates or cards or somthing.

slurpeegirl13's picture
Joined: 02/26/07
Posts: 4125

I only got to be a SAHM for the first 11 months, but I felt that way a lot of the time ... I joined a mommy group in my area and I met a lot of people and had a lot of fun ...

For my 'career', I kinda fell into it ... my parents bought a meat packing plant and they needed some help in the office ... they recruited me 'for a little while' and it's been 5.5 years. Since being here, I've gone to school again (I have a degree in Sociology I finished before I got recruited by my parents), and I completed the first year of an office admin diploma, and I got my certification in payroll. I really like the HR part of my job, and I never thought I'd like the accounting part, but I do!